Please Help. I feel so lost :(

[TallulahTaboo]

Firstly, thank you for reading. Just like my title explains, please help, I feel beyond lost. My LO won't sleep through the night. And I know this i is a completely normal but this has been ongoing for months.

My LO used to be a fab sleeper, 10/12 hours a night sometimes and since the 5 month sleep regression, he wakes every night. He's nearly 8 months.

And I feel I've tried everything (or maybe not?) and I'm still no further forward. Ive tried allowing him to nap long, nap short, an early bedtime, a late bedtime and still nothing seems to work. We have a routine in for bed and have had that since he was a newborn and never had any bother putting him down. Naps are good too, maybe 1/5 are a struggle but he always goes down.

What am I doing wrong? Am I not doing enough? Should I be calling in a sleep consultant? I should say I bought Just Chill Mamas online course, done everything and still nothing!

He's not got new teeth coming through, he's not ill.... I'm nearly at breaking point. And not to mention how mentally I feel like a failure (I know I'm not but I feel like it) especially when all my friends little ones who are similar ages are sleeping through.

And people who say 'it's just a phase' are probably absolutely right but if doesn't help.

Can anyone suggest anything else? Am I doing something wrong?

As pp said make up to 8oz. As your giving 4 bottles - I think personally that's enough if you can be sure lo is getting enough in day. Especially if your upping to 8 oz. My 8 month old has 3/4 8oz a day. 9/930 2/230 730/8 sometimes I add a 4pm one but its small one.

I found my LO woke in night and I upped her food and water intake in the day which helped the sleeping through.

@lapinr0se I'm curious how to make 9oz bottles? As I can only see way to make 8oz on the box. a 9oz bottle would be perfect at bedtime for my LO .

You just buy a bigger bottle and add one more scoop of powder and up the ml of water accordingly.

Well done OP.

I echo what others have said that if he's polishing off his last bottle perhaps increase? And hopefully over time, as he gets used to being put down fully awake after stories, he'll start to take this learning on through the night.

Good luck, you seem to totally have this! ✅

@Fancyties From memory isn't one scoop about an extra 30ml of water (I always found it easier to work in ml)? Obviously check your formula instructions!

So get a 270ml bottle and make it up with 255ml or 9oz water and add the relevant scoops.

@LapinR0se @Fancyties @BlusteringBoobies I'll up his milk to 8/9oz and see how he finds that. I'll keep offering him his milk and water too.

Feeling more confident for today/tonight too!

Thank you 🤗

Just thinking about it if LO is hungry in night, I'm a naughty mum. I give her dinner about 515/530. Then when we eat I give her a bit of it 😂 which is usually about 630 or I give a farleys rusk or couple heinz biscuit thing 🤷🏼‍♀️ still takes 7/8oz for bed. May just help fill lo up. Some people swear by a biscuit thing and a full bottle of milk before bed.

I do think the 3am waking was hunger 🤔 I go by If LO hasnt resettld within 30mins to hour of resettling, then I do a small feed (5oz or so) just enough to see through till morning. Then next day I offer as much food and milk as possible to give her as many calories as possible to prevent night waking. (I'm blw weaning now though as she refuses all purees for past 4 days 🤦🏼‍♀️ I used to do both )

He slept 7.20 to 5.30 without waking up last night.... I know it's probably a one off but at least I know he can do it. I followed everyone's tips and it obviously worked! Going to continue to do the same every night and hope it pays off long term!

Thank you all so so much 🤍

Whoop whoop 🤗 I would try pushing that last wake window if having 3 naps more to 8pm. It will likely stop the 530am wake ups after a few weeks but that's my personal view, as worked with my LO. Bed 8pm wakes between 6 and 7 x

Yay! Well done OP! Forming new habits takes some time to bed in but hopefully it won't be a one off and things will improve as you gear up to restart work! 🙌

Hey @TallulahTaboo how is it all going?

Please keep in mind that some people do actually lie about how well their baby sleeps, I have no idea why but they actually do. So as someone who endlessly compared, please take comfort from the fact that you are doing nothing wrong. Some babies sleep one way and some sleep other ways.

I would second what previous posters have said about possibly expecting a bit much from sleep at this age. Waking up at least once is totally normal.

@LapinR0se hello, thank you for checking in 🤍He's not slept through since my earlier post and we've had some good nights and a couple of awful nights but we are still powering through. The only issue I'm battling just now is he's taking his 8oz or so before bed but peeing through his nappy! 🙈 so we've got a bigger nappy and different brand on him tonight to see if that helps.

@Mattieandmummy I definitely am. I never thought I'd be one of those people who compare their child to someone else's but here I am! I've been more relaxed this week since the night he slept right through and powering through the lack of sleep. I appreciate your comments though 🤍

Yes put him in a bigger nappy for sure! Is he going down fully awake?

@LapinR0se nappy success last night but still the usual waking, 12am (instead of 11pm) 3am 5am wake up call. Yeh he's still going down fully awake and I only got up to resettle him once at 3am, I let him self soothe and he went over himself. I know it will just take time 🤦🏽‍♀️

Check the temp of the room as well, DS went through a stage of this the winter he was a similar age, and when he woke at around 1am chucking another blanket over him seemed to help- I was surprised by how much the temperature dropped in his room from bedtime to the early hours.

Is lo crying at these times? Or just whinging?

@Ricetwisty his room can be quite could as it's above the garage but we've put the radiator on full and done some improvements to keep the heat in. When I went in last night around 3am it was 22degrees but a cool 22 degrees if that makes sense? I did think the cooler temp could be a factor.

@Fancyties just general moaning really. However sometimes it can develop into a cry 🤷🏼‍♀️

If lo is moaning I gernally leave, it's the change in the cry that I go in. I don't know if it's right. But if she needs me she let's me know.

What's lo wearing @ night?

@TallulahTaboo I know this is contentious. But? Having been exactly where you are now, would you consider sleep training?

What are his naps like in the day? Eg how many, what times and how long for?

There were a few things I did (actually on the advice of a sleep consultant) which I'm happy to go into more detail if you like, and my LO had one bad night and has slept through pretty much ever since. If you had told me this would have happened I'd never had believed it!!

@jemimafuddleduck absolutely yes! I did buy the Just chill Mama sleep course and we were doing most of what she suggested and the things we weren't we implemented and still nothing. Personally I found the course a waste of money 🤷🏼‍♀️

He has either 2/3 naps a day depending on what time he wakes (usually between 5-6am) and they total anything from 2.5-3.5 hours a day.

We actually had an ok night last night... he was up twice, resettled with his dummy and he went back over with no crying or screaming so that's a small win!

Great that you had a good night!

I would cut his naps back. Aim for 1 hour at 9:30 (no matter what time he woke up - even if he woke at 5, push him through to 9:30). And then another hour at 2:30. Again, he'll probably stay to sleep before 2:30 but push him.

Dinner at 5, bath at 6:30, in bed for 7.

This worked for us, it felt counter intuitive initially as everyone says they need more sleep, and it felt really tough to keep her awake. But, it did work!

Oh wow @jemimafuddleduck that's hard core!

I meant he will probably WANT to sleep before 2:30 not stay!

@Fancyties yeah it is hard!! But, we went from being completely at the end of our tethers to having a baby who consistently sleeps through, and it took one night!