My toddler doesn't sleep

[Catsandkittens638297]

DD is 2 in March, shes never been a good sleeper. Maybe once a month she sleeps all the way through.

We put her to bed at 6pm, by 11pm she is wide awake until 3am.
I never ever take her out of her bed.
90% of the time she doesn't cry she just talks really loud, let's out the odd scream to let me know she's awake.
Il go in after a while check her/change her nappy, give her her dummy (no hate for that please) and give her some water.
She's warm enough and has a good routine except she doesn't nap during the day because she refuses unless she's had a really bad night.

I also have a three year old who goes to bed at the same time and sleeps straight through. I'm currently pregnant with DC 3 so need her to start sleeping before babies born.
She doesn't have a lot of sugar and has a really good diet.
She wakes up generally at about 8.30am and is in a great mood all day, like the lack of sleep doesn't bother her
I just can't carry on with no sleep.
Can anyone suggest something

Sounds tough. Could you co sleep? That's what always meant I had the most sleep and they grow out of it

@elvislives2012 we tried co sleeping, it didn't work🤦 she just stayed awake and whined every time I went near her

6 sounds very early for bed time. Can you put it back an hour and see if that helps?

I was going to say the same, 6pm is very early, our 18 month old goes to bed at 7pm (he has no naps during the day) and sleeps through! Perhaps give her a later bedtime?

Could you push her bedtime back to around 7.30? See if that might help. Maybe she isn't tired enough by 6 to.sleep through and just has a long nap and then up again. You have my sympathy as my two eldest did that 2 hr wakings during the night. I always dropped naps around 2.5 yrs. Maybe bring back the nap and push bedtime. Maybe over tired by 6pm if no nap? Its so hard & very much trial and error.

We've tried putting her to bed at 8pm, it didn't make a difference 😭

What strikes me is that being pregnant, you still seem to be dealing with the night wakes. That should be your partner's job both whilst you are needing extra sleep because of pregnancy, and to free you up (if breastfeeding, otherwise they can be shared too) with the new baby.

My partner works away so he can't really help out

Does she need her nappy changing? Or a drink of water? Have you tried not going in at all through the night? Do you have a can you watch on so you can see she’s ok?

You need to get the circadian rhythm in check.

Wake her up at 6 if you’re putting her to bed at 6. 7 if you’re putting her to bed at 7 and so on. After a few days it will improve, 8:30 is a massive lie in if she’s going down at 6

@FTEngineerM I think that's what I'm going to try doing. She's only sleeping In till 8.30 because she's up all night

DS wasn’t quite that bad but he has started to almost sleep through now I shifted his bed time to 8:30. He still wakes up 3 times for a feed but they’re mostly dream feeds now.

@Catsandkittens638297 I know it’s hard, ours was having a party at 5am but that’s stopped now 🥳🥳. First days were horrible because it’s knackering but will be worth it.

Try putting her to bed at 8pm.
Personally I never put mine to bed that early.

How long did you stick with the later bedtime though? A few weeks won't cut it, this is a months to years changes. It took years for my oldest to sleep through, but 6pm sounds way too early in your case.

I’m going to be contrary and say does she need a nap on the day? For many kids a good sleep in the day begets good sleep at night as they aren’t wired and overtired.

Is she also stimulated enough in the day? Exercise and fresh air count for a lot. Some gentle but structured activities, puzzles, play dough/crafts etc and 1-1 time all help.

I think keep trying the eight o’clock bedtime.

Sympathy - that sounds grim.

We've literally been through this with our 18 month old! She never slept through, would go to bed at 7 and be up around 10 for three hours every night. We started to put her to bed at 8 and just like that she started sleeping through. We did introduce white noise on low as we live on a busy main road. So it could be a mix of both. She's not woken up once in a month now.

DS 22 months sleeps through about 5 out of 7 days, he has a couple of nights where he’ll just be awake in his cot for 2 hours, just lies there really so we don’t need to see to him and thankfully usually doesn’t wake us up (we have a camera in his room you can check back)
It’s usually on nursery days where he’s wired and only napped for an hour and has gone to bed at 7pm exhausted. So he’s overtired. I wake him up in the morning at 7 as usual, then he’ll be ready for a long nap that day, and then goes back to sleeping through. I think 6pm is an early bedtime, 8pm would be too late for DS. I’d also wake her at a reasonable morning time even if she’s been awake at night.