Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Sleep

Join our Sleep forum for tips on creating a sleep routine for your baby or toddler. Need more advice on your childs development? Sign up to our Ages and Stages newsletter here.

SLEEP IS FOR THE WEEK part 7 -- prop your eyes open with matchsticks here

1000 replies

MegBusset · 21/10/2007 09:18

Zzzzzzzzzzzzz...

OP posts:
gingerninja · 26/10/2007 20:21

Chilbi, yes yes yes. I've very much felt like that. The age you're at is such a hard time, it really is. Don't beat yourself up too much, yes it's bloody annoying when you seem to be the only one with a sleepless child but it isn't the case, there are thousands that don't admit to it. You should try and focus on something else when you're with your friends. COuld you politely tell them that you're feeling a bit down about lack of sleep and you want to steer clear of the subject? I know Tam has said this, and I agree, mn is a fantastic support but it's also a bit of a curse. I found when I was at my lowest mn was my saviour but it also made me obsessive about sleep. I spent far far too much time worrying about it. Of course this is another one of those occasions in motherhood where hindsight is a wonderful thing but you have my word. It does get better.

From memory, 4/5 months were the worst, little unsettled at 6 (due to weaning I think) settled down much better and consistent at 7 months, slight regression at 9 months. Been much better since about 11/12 months. It has definately got better, easier and more predictable through doing nothing. We tried PU/PD at 4 months which was awful we tried gradual retreat for a while which was good but I gave up when she learned to pull herself up as it was like a jack in the box so we reverted to cuddling her to sleep. These days we lay with her and then transfer her to her cot when she's down.

My advice to you would be this. Ignore all advice, discussion, reading, writing about sleep for one whole week. On those mornings you feel terrible, instead of wallowing and searching for answers as to why your LO doesn't sleep, get out. even if it's just to the park for a walk or to sit in the library. Sometimes being out just makes these things seem less important. During this week remember the SIFTW mantra and repeat daily, "it is just a phase". I pretty much guarantee that after a week, you might not be getting any more sleep, but you will feel a whole lot better about it.

chibi · 26/10/2007 20:59

dear god 2 hours of trying to get her down i feel damned

Amberjee · 26/10/2007 21:02

poor you. she will get there. xxx

MegBusset · 26/10/2007 21:18

Chibi, 5 months was the absolute worst time for my LO. There were nights when I absolutely despaired, to the point of tears, and if it wasn't for the fact he has eczema I might even have cracked and done cc. It was awful. But at 8mo now he is a lot better, due to a combination of things (stopping feeding to sleep, eczema improving, going into his own room, dropping the 3rd nap) but really just down to age. He is just getting slowly (very slowly!) used to the idea that nighttime is for sleeping.

I would really recommend what Ginger said. Sounds silly but after an awful night, if I felt like I was resenting DS, I would dress him up in the cutest outfit I had, and go and do something nice with him like walk round the park. Just to remind myself that the good bits were worth the awful bits.

You are not alone, loads of us have gone through it and it will get better, I promise. At 5 months there were nights when I was in to him 10 times before midnight. These days 4 wakings is a bad night, 3 the usual, and 2 is a good night. It's still not easy but so much better, so just grit your teeth and hang in there...

OP posts:
EffiePerine · 27/10/2007 08:12

Chibi: I would follow my DH's methods if it's taking that long to put your LO down: give up on it and try later . DS is much better when he's had an earlier night, but some nights it just aint happening. If it takes more than an hour I bring him back in with us and try again when he shows signs of being sleepy (DH gives it 15 mins tops before giving up but he has less patience than me). I found the worst part was spending bloody HOURS in the bedroom trying to get DS to sleep. I'd get wound up, he'd get wound up and it escalated till I was crying and knackered myself and DS was still bluncing around showing no signs of ever settling! Whenever we've gone through periods of later nights I've found they settle down after a while and we're back to the earlier bedtimes.

Hope there were some good nights out there. DS back to waking every couple of hours (sigh) but not too difficult to get back to sleep. He is now grinning at me so probably doing something he shouldn't - will have to investigate!

MegBusset · 27/10/2007 08:43

Morning

Mostly a good night here...
Asleep at 8
Awake at 3 (fed) -- crawling round the cot playfully til 4
Awake at 6 for the day -- so much for me pushing back his routine to avoid a 5am start tomorrow...

OP posts:
Tamdin · 27/10/2007 08:53

ep glad ds was easy to settle after waking. makes all the difference.

meg your nights sound like they're making such an improvemnt to a month ago

ds had vom session when i was trying to put him to bed so that wasn't a great start but once we got cleaned up he was easy to put down.
asleep by 8.40
woke at 7.45 for day

bealcain · 27/10/2007 08:57

meg - for your night in comparison to mine!

i feel bloody awful this morning! i've literally had half an hours sleep, i'm shattered and why i'm down here watching my DS1 LO is upstairs catching up on all the sleep he missed last night, little bugger!

Chibi - i know what you mean about resenting them and stuff and i'm totally with you there sister! i'd quite happily give him away today!

we're going through separation anxiety at the moment hence bad nights, but it's so annoying, it's not separtion from anyone just me, so i have to do everything for him and have him with me constantly during day, i have a sling so it's ok, well i have many, i'm addicted but there we go. DF doesn't agree with co/s so that's out, i'm at the end of my tether and taking my mood out on DS1, who as we speak is wuite happily watching me too! his 2nd hour of watching telly today bad mum, i know!

bealcain · 27/10/2007 08:58

am i really thick??? do the clocks go back tomorrw?

Tamdin · 27/10/2007 09:02

beal clocks go back tonight at 2am to 1am.

for yoru night. could dh nto sit with ds1 while you go back to bed this morning?

tibsy · 27/10/2007 09:02

morning all!!

chibi - no further words of wisdom, our siftw friends have covered it all and eloquently, lovely lot that they are just wanted to lend my support, send big cyber (((hugs))) and say, yes, it most certainly does get easier. hang on in there lovely, and do whatever it takes to get through.

tam - how late did ds go to bed after late nap?

meg that was a fab night, apart from the hour long playtime obviously. apart what tomorrow a.m will bring

EP - about the frequent wakings. hope ds didnt get into too much mischief

well, after a couple of crappy, crappy nights, dd came through for me and gave a goodun [thankful emoticon]

bed at 8pm
woke at 4.45am (drink of milk)
woke at 7.45am for the day

man, i needed that!

tibsy · 27/10/2007 09:05

X posted

Tam for your night. youre giving me hope my darling!!!

Beal for your night my love. dd only had sep anx for me too, some days, if she wasnt attached to my boobs, it was my hip, or in the sling that was the same for the night too. hang on in there lovely. as tam suggested, rope df in to watch them whilst you snooze.

bealcain · 27/10/2007 09:06

he works saturday mornings...i will definately be getting them both to sleep at same time so i can have a nap later and definately having a lie in tomrrow!

MegBusset · 27/10/2007 09:08

Tibsy, for your night, you've earned it!

Beal for yours, can you leave DS1 in front of the telly for half an hour and snooze on the sofa?

Tam for your night too. You're right, I do feel like his sleep has improved a lot in the past month or two, although I still feel knackered! DH 'helpfully' suggested giving him the dummy as he fidgeted around in our bed at 6am, as if I would go and undo all that hard work! But to be fair, DH has got a cold so wasn't feeling very much like being awake at 6...

OP posts:
MegBusset · 27/10/2007 09:45

PS anyone buy the Guardian onn a Saturday? You might find a pic of DS in the Family section...

OP posts:
Tamdin · 27/10/2007 09:46

no meg normally get the times/ will go a lookin when we're out later. how did that come about?

tibsy · 27/10/2007 09:57

will make sure i do meggy

gingerninja · 27/10/2007 10:05

Disturbed sleep and very early waking today but managed to get her back eventually and slept unti 8 so we're gonna pretend the clocks have changed today and shift everything by an hour. She was just restless rather than too awake but it obviously had me awake so feel pretty knackered but I'm certain once these blasted molars have made an appearence she'll settle again.

Tam and Tibsy for your nights. Meg yours sounds pretty great too. Beal for yours. You're doing so well with two. Chilbi, hope yours settled down.

Must dash DD is into EVERYTHING now she can walk

Tamdin · 27/10/2007 10:12

ginger ds does that unsettled thing at least one night a week when he's not really awake but changing position every 2 minutes. hard to sleep next to isn't it!

tibsy · 27/10/2007 10:17

ginger for your restless night lovely. bring on those flaming molars! its so cute watching them toddle along isnt it? but, yep, into everything ...hope you manage to get some rest today x

charliemama · 27/10/2007 10:57

Hello all. i wanted to write something quick so you would know i am still here and thinking about you. I'm not much good at remembering everyones name and what they've posted so I hope big s for those whose night went well and sympathy for those feeling knackered will cover it. (I apologise if this is bad net etiquette!)

As you will all know from your own experiences we have good days and not so good days at maison charliemama. thanks to all thise who suggested I re-look into silent reflux. After some research on the web ds2 does seem to fit alot of the symptoms. I will try to get past the guard receptionist at my surgery to see my nice sympathetic doctor next week.

Got to go cos not even dressed and due at co (cue ranting dh) in half an hour .

charliemama · 27/10/2007 10:59

Forgot to mention tragedy! Silent reflux is aggraveted by chocolate . Will I survive?

Amberjee · 27/10/2007 11:14

hi everyone,

hope the CO works some magic CM.
ginger, hope the molars pop through soon and things settle down
tibs, glad yougot to catch up a bit
megs, will try to peek at the guardian today
poor belcain, hope you catch some zzzzz soon
ep, when will this end!?
hi tam!

we had a night of two halves. a loooong waking from about 11 to 1 or something with screaming, attempted rocking, attempted co-sleeping, attempted feeding - but nothing worked until the attempted nurofen! then nothing until 6am must have worn himself out. up for a while, then slept 7 to 9 again. so actually think while the night was tough to begin, i got some decent sleep!

tibsy · 27/10/2007 12:40

amber a big fat for 2nd 1/2 of your night and a wow for your 9am lie in!!!

charlie hope all goes well at the CO and def sounds like a good idea to get lo checked out re. silent reflux.......no chocolate tho, that is some sacrifice

meggy - i got it!!!! what a gorgeous little man, he looks quite grown up too, bless your mum does look a little unsure about the whole thing tho i hope you had a lovely time with her, it looks like you did

chibi · 27/10/2007 18:02

CM I am v interested to hear how the CO goes - I've heard good things but am a little unsure.

amber, ginger, Meg effie beal + tibsy thanks for the encouragement.
I am just so at the end of my tether at the mo. It is helpful to hear that this will pass.

LO hasn't really napped all day today. She is usually quite good + has 3 naps 45 min-1 hourish. She will occasionally miss one out but never all of them! I reckon she has had maybe 30 minutes all total today, who knows what tonight has in store for us.

I hope you all get a good rest tonight.

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.

This thread is not accepting new messages.