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Original poster

Wtf is going on, 8 week old still not sleep

62 replies

JamesonCask · 23/09/2019 00:38

Been trying since 8pm to get her to sleep and every time I put her down she wakes up. Im exhausted.

No to co-sleeping before anyone suggests it.

I tried googling sleep regression etc and can't find anything. It's been 3 days of bad sleep now, very short naps unless being walked in buggy

OP posts:
titnomatani · 23/09/2019 00:56

Been there, don't that. Co-sleeping was the only thing that worked for me. Give it a try.

Original poster
JamesonCask · 23/09/2019 01:08

No I really don't want to co sleep. Im surprised that 5 hours with only tiny naps she isn't tired herself. Is this how it will be or is it just a phase and will pass shortly?

OP posts:
Squeakybubbles26 · 23/09/2019 01:14

I feel your pain .. well with the putting them down part 😩
My 10 week old DD is a bad napper, usually balling about 30mins in the cot or maybe a little longer on us (this isn't always an option tho)!
However it feels like the last couple of dahs the night times have changed .. waking earlier and for some reason tonight will happily fall asleep on me but the moment I transfer her to her cot bam she's awake!
I'm sure it's only a phase .. and have no advice myself but just to say your not alone!

harper30 · 23/09/2019 01:21

I'm afraid mine was the same and it's not what you wanted to hear but we ended up cosleeping for a few months. Because I used to breastfeed lying down in bed I could just feed her to sleep then roll away from her and she'd sleep for a couple of hours before needing another feed and it saved my from dying from exhaustion as I could just lie in bed the whole time whilst feeding etc.
We also used white noise?
And some of the impossible nights we went back to swaddling as we seemed to run out of options and sometimes a tight swaddle used to work?

titnomatani · 23/09/2019 01:27

Could it be you baby is cold, poorly, hungry, uncomfortable, over/under stimulated? Colicky? Suffering from (silent) reflux?

Mine (13 month old) has always been a nightmare sleeper and stubborn to boot so I could've jumped through hoops in every way possible and he'd scream the place down until he was in my arms or next to me feeding. Every regression, tooth eruption, whatever else has been majorly painful for me because it's meant his sleep has become worse than it already is. He was colicky and had silent reflux in the first trimester so I can't blame him too much for giving me sleepless nights. The name of the game in the early months is survival- do what you can do to get through it. It will/does get better. Eventually. The 4 month sleep regression is the worst (prepare for it) but mine got into a bit of a routine after that. Yours might too.

MustardScreams · 23/09/2019 01:27

She sounds massively overtired.

Unfortunately another advocate of cosleeping here! Dd slept with me till she was 1 and it made life a LOT easier. If you do it safely it’s no more dangerous than in a cot.

Teddybear45 · 23/09/2019 01:45

Is she crying? If not leave her to it until she cries. A sleep routine might help too - my sisters both had terrible sleepers at 8 weeks but managed to turn it around with fixed routines (bath, feed, nappy change, cuddles, bed) and improving their sleep hygiene (blackout curtains, moving any bright infrared camera sensors away from the cot etc). It takes commitment and time but could sort it out.

BertrandRussell · 23/09/2019 01:55

Why don’t you want to consleep? You can do it safely- and at this stage anything that gets the most sleep for the most people is the way forward.

darceybussell · 23/09/2019 02:05

We put a sleepyhead in between us in the bed with a hot water bottle or wheat bag in it to warm it up, I fed the baby as close as I could get to the sleepyhead, put the white noise on, waited a while and then really slowly slid him into the sleepyhead. That worked for a while! Was harder when he woke up in the night and I had to try and repeat it once the hot water bottle had gone cold! He grew out of it about 4 months and then he became a lot easier to put down (at night, anyway, he still didn't like being put down for naps).

TillyTheTiger · 23/09/2019 02:06

Sorry I'm another for whom co-sleeping was literally the only thing that worked and believe me it was a last resort after everything else failed, and I was basically delirious from lack of sleep. Obviously not an option if you're on medication/ a heavy drinker or if baby has risk factors like prematurity. But otherwise it's worth considering.

darceybussell · 23/09/2019 02:09

Also sometimes did the same but with the sleepyhead in the sidecar crib. I'm sure someone will be along to say that sleepyheads aren't recommended any more, but we used one. Falling asleep holding the baby also definitely isn't recommended and that's the alternative if she won't be put down!

edgeofheaven · 23/09/2019 02:15

Do you have the Wonder Weeks app? It shows you whenever there are developmental leaps and often those are the cause of poor sleep. I just checked for you and there is one that starts at 8 weeks and lasts for around 2 1/2 weeks.

littleduckeggblue · 23/09/2019 02:21

White noise?

OrangeSwoosh · 23/09/2019 03:17

Google 4th Trimester. Baby wants to be close to you. Co sleeping safely with a next to me crib was an absolute game changer here.

ocefrag · 23/09/2019 03:40

This reply has been deleted

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LiveInAHidingPlace · 23/09/2019 03:50

Is there a reason you're so opposed to cosleeping?

You can get attachments for the bed so they're not actually in with you.

There's a reason it's the most common practice in most of the world: the only way for people to get any sleep most of the time!

Scythrop · 23/09/2019 03:57

Hope you've had some sleep by now, OP. Here are the things that sometimes helped when I was in the same boat: Try warming the cot with a hot water bottle, remove it just before you put her in. Also pop a shirt you've worn recently in as a top sheet for the comforting smell. And wait till her arm drops, i.e. make sure she's deeply asleep before putting down. And swaddle if she's startling awake (if she likes swaddling). And if she's looking for something to suck, offer little finger upside down - can sometimes soothe back to sleep when they semi wake on putting down. White noise occasionally seemed to help. Plus very dark room. And waiting a moment while they wriggle on putting down, sometimes they're just getting comfortable anx can look/act awake while sleeping. And I still put a comforting hand on belly for a moment after putting down. (And it gets better. DD is six months and we have never bed shared. I'm still feeding to sleep (or DP rocks her), but apart from occasional phases has become easier to put down and she sleeps for hours after that)

cravingmilkshake · 23/09/2019 04:18

My baby is 8 weeks and goes down at 9pm every night, wakes for a feed at 3 then sleeps until 7... I strongly believe it's because of the next to me crib and Ewan the dream sheep! Try tHat, it really worked for us.

Also, we co slept for 6 weeks- worth it's weight in gold- if you can't do that- invest in a next to me crib.

I hope you get some sleep soon. X

burritofan · 23/09/2019 07:02

Lol, at 8 weeks my baby woke 18,000 times a night and we had a sidecar crib and a dream sheep, which is now gathering dust on the floor. It's not the sheep, it's the baby.

OP, has your baby had the 8-week jabs? My daughter had a fortnight of (literally, sometimes) shitty sleep after those. Then a fortnight of mediocre sleep followed by the 12-week growth spurt from hell leading us nicely into the four-month regression.

Why the no to cosleeping? I never expected to do it either but I'm currently alive and perky after a night of 6 or 7 wake-ups.

theyvegotme · 23/09/2019 07:10

Bottle or breastfed?

She isn't going to go down I'm afraid. At this age they need to be on you. I'd stop trying.

Why the stance on cosleeping?

Hope you got some rest

Squeakybubbles26 · 23/09/2019 07:37

When you all say co sleeping so you mean sleeping next to you in the bed?

My DD physically wants to be on my chest (me led on back she sleeps on her front - not advised I know but that's what she likes)

However I know the risks in this so try not to but if she needs her sleep I think she's only little.

Just wondered what everyone else does with the LO?

MustardScreams · 23/09/2019 08:05

@Squeakybubbles26 yes exactly. When they’re tiny I suggest only with mum in bed because dad won’t wake up in the same way as you do.

I took all pillows etc off bed, just had two on my side. Dd slept basically nose in line with boobs, and I slept on my side facing her with one arm out above her head to prevent rolling.

Duvet was on, but I kept most of it hanging off my side, so that if I moved in the night the duvet would fall off the bed rather than onto dd.

Have a look at the ‘C’ shape you naturally sleep in if your bf and cosleeping. This is the safest way to cosleep when they’re small. As dd got older (8 months+) we slept any old way.

Original poster
JamesonCask · 23/09/2019 08:07

Sorry I didn't get any notifications to say I had replies.

She eventually went to sleep at 2am.

The reason I don't want to co sleep is because I don't want the habit of always having to lie down with her. I never did it with my son either and I know nearly everyone on mumsnet disagrees with that but it just isn't for me.

She has woken up this morning all stuffed up with a cold so I wonder is that what was stopping her sleeping last night or maybe just coincidence.

She wasn't actually crying when I put her down just instantly went from sleep with eyes closed to alert and then would start moving etc

She is breastfed and I have her in a swaddle. She was ok to sleep up to recently, would sleep for 4 hours then go 2 hours.

Hope the rest of you got some sleep!

OP posts:
LiveInAHidingPlace · 23/09/2019 08:09

"The reason I don't want to co sleep is because I don't want the habit of always having to lie down with her."

They don't form habits that early. Until six months is when you might start thinking about habit forming.

burritofan · 23/09/2019 08:11

Squeakybubble yes, squished next to me. I do the protective C shape and DD does, well, whatever she wants. Sometimes flat on her back starfished with one hand on my boob to check it's there; most of the time she favours rolling on to her side facing me, head wedged firmly in my armpit, one arm wrapped possessively around my boob, the other hand clutching my mouth or sticking tiny sharp claws up my nose. DP sleeps on the sofa :)

Duvet is round my waist and tucked in under my knees so it can't ride up/DD can't slide under it; pillow is behind my head. Snuzpod on DD's side to catch her if she rolls/hold my water bottle, phone and snacks.