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Sleep

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Original poster

Early wakings really effecting family!

85 replies

SnowWhite26 · 09/04/2019 06:16

Hi
So i no this is about the millionth post abput a 7 month old waking at 5 or 5.30. My issue is that its different everyday and its really effecting me which effecting my family. Basically he can go through without food but in a way if he wakes at 12 or 1 for a small feed he will prob sleep till 5.30,6 or 6.30.I ignore him or give him a small feed at this time but if he wakes up we take it in turns to get up.last night he went 7 till 5 with no wake ups but milk and leaving him wouldn't work and i eventually angryly gave in at 5.45. I think i get so cross coz i no he will be ready to bk to sleep by 7 or 730 so makes breakfast etc all over the place. My 3 year old used to wake early and eventually stopped so i no it does. I just get so cross. As i have quite a few friends who say all i do is give them.milk then they go back to sleep on them for a bit or they go back in there cot. Why does my baby not do this! Yesterday he slept till 6.30 with a little feed at 12 the night before he woke for a small feed at 11 but woke at 5.30 for the day. Its just so all over the place. I no he does ok with sleep but im so tired with my 3 year old as well. Is anyone else in this boat? Why do all my friends babies go bk to sleep at 5 or 5.30? I feel like my husband is going to send me to an asylum if i keep going on like this. I was so unreasonably angry this morning after all my calm effort to get him back to sleep.I no my husband is finding it hard with work and 2 kids and a crazy wife! Anyone else? Thankyou x

OP posts:

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WinterHeatWave · 09/04/2019 06:34

Honestly, not all babies go back to sleep at that time. My 10YEAR old is usually awake by 5.15. The 8 year old by 6.
We have just shifted our day. We all get up early, have breakfast, tidy, chores, read, play on tablets. Then after school, we can go out, because everything has been done.
Yes, it means I go to bed earlier than many, but hey, it works for us. Nights out are hard, because I want to be asleep by 10, but that's not all the time.

MintyT · 09/04/2019 06:39

Bring the baby into bed with you. You should be getting a big chunk of sleep. It's just an early start. Or quite you feed and go downstairs and start your day and all nap

dancemom · 09/04/2019 06:40

Is baby on solids?
Try a small supper before bed

user1474894224 · 09/04/2019 06:42

Sorry but YABU. Your 7 month old is sleeping from 7-5.....and you're complaining. Do you know how amazing that is. Just go to bed earlier so you aren't so tired. Getting up at 5 is not that much of a hardship. And yes baby will nap again by 8 or 9.....they are a baby it's what they do.

hopefulhalf · 09/04/2019 06:43

It is irritatung would a dream feed at 11pm work otherwise go to bed at 9:30pm? What does the rest of his sleep look like ? Try to postpone the morning nap until at least 8:30- morning naps exacerbate the problem IME.

SoyDora · 09/04/2019 06:44

A later bedtime? Shift his whole day back an hour? It won’t work instantly but the baby would adjust in about a week (like then the clocks change).
I know it’s hard, DD2 woke up at between 5 and 5.30am for around 6 months. I find early mornings harder than night wakings.
Alternatively, try a dream feed at around 11?

NoParticularPattern · 09/04/2019 06:47

Early morning waking is very normal, especially at 7 months old. My daughter is 14 months and gets up any time after 4 having gone to sleep about 7 and woken between two and four times overnight. 7-5 is a really good length of time for a 7 month old to sleep and really should be enabling you to get a decent chunk yourself. Early mornings are a bit crap, I know this, but it’s light very shortly after 5 at this time of year and it really isn’t that antisocial.

vegpatch · 09/04/2019 06:50

I'm sorry, but I think your expectations are a bit unreasonable. You get loads of evening time, which is a massive luxury. As others have said, shift your expectations and go to bed earlier. It's not going to be forever.

ememem84 · 09/04/2019 06:51

Ds has been awake now for an hour. He’s 18 months. I’m downstairs with him having breakfast.

Dh did it yesterday.

I’ve also thrown a load of laundry in the machine and will (hopefully) be able to pop it on the line before we leave for work and nursery.

I’m usually in bed by 10 at the latest now. Ds goes to bed at around 730.

tomhazard · 09/04/2019 06:53

5.30 is so normal for little babies. My DC are older than that and the wake up by 6.30, the 4 year old sometimes earlier. Neither of them have ever gone back to sleep if they wake up at that time. You have to make your peace with it, the baby doesn't care if you are tired and if he's not going back to sleep then you need to stop winding yourself up about it and accept earlier starts for a bit.
I know it's tough but changing your mental outlook on this will help.

vegpatch · 09/04/2019 06:54

I'm also a bit that you feel 'angry'and 'cross' about it? Tired, yes...angry, no. The baby is just doing exactly what is age appropriate and you'll have to adapt for a while. I know tiredness is a killer, but if you shift your mind set so that you recognise baby isn't being 'naughty' or doing anything wrong, you might feel less cross

AloneLonelyLoner · 09/04/2019 06:59

Angry? At a baby? A baby who sleeps for hours and hours. I'm confused. I've had five wee scunners that woke up all the damn time. It doesn't last forever.

YABU. Go to bed earlier.

abcriskringle · 09/04/2019 07:03

Sorry that you're angry and upset but you are actually incredibly lucky! 7pm-5pm is an amazing stretch! My son used to wake every 2-3 hours at that age and still be up at 5am. Just get an early night and make the most of that lovely long stretch of sleep.

NoParticularPattern · 09/04/2019 07:05

Just to add that I know what you mean by angry (or rather I hope this is what you mean). I get it too when I have to get up at 4am but I’m not angry with the baby, not in any way. I am, however, pissed off that I’ve been woken up probably 3/4/5 times before that and that I then have to get up hours before everyone else. It doesn’t sound like that’s similar for you though- you appear to be getting the opportunity for a decent evening to yourself plus a good chunk of night sleep. It’s unreasonable to be angry AT a baby, pissed off at the situation yes, but not AT the baby.

blackcat86 · 09/04/2019 07:07

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Sexnotgender · 09/04/2019 07:09

You’re being very unreasonable!

Why are you so angry? Anger is a weird emotion to feel in this situation.

I’m not surprised they won’t settle for you if you’re so angry.

TeddyIsaHe · 09/04/2019 07:16

Angry because your baby wakes up early? He’s not doing it to piss you off, he’s doing it because he is a baby and you are his security and warmth and he wants you. It doesn’t last forever, and while it is hideous having to get up early that’s kind of the deal with kids.

Try a dreamfeed when you go to bed to see if that helps? Or go to bed earlier yourself so 5am isn’t so knackering.

DrWhy · 09/04/2019 07:25

You need to either shift your day or the babies - 7 until 5 is a 10 hour stretch it’s probably all they need. Either go to bed yourself at 9.30 aiming to be asleep by 10 and get 7 hours straight plus a couple of hours of evening. Or if (like me) you hate mornings get good black out blinds (really good ones that seal into a frame) and shift their bedtime routine back by 15 minutes every couple of days until they are (hopefully) going to sleep at 8ish and getting up at 6ish or whatever works for you.

EmmaJR1 · 09/04/2019 07:31

I don't think you're helping yourself get advice the way you have written your OP. You're ranting which is all well and good but your baby sleeps through the majority of the time it seems?

Your complaint seems to be that your baby doesn't fit it with your current routine?

To be fair WHOSE DOES?

I have 2 children, both amazing sleepers by any standards really but I know when their patterns change it knocks me for six because I JUST got used to it.

Even though I get a fair amount of sleep for someone with 2u2 I'm still tired and sometimes resentful that my life has changed so much so fast in ways I couldn't have planned for.

HOWEVER I'm not angry or cross at my children and my husband, although concerned about my hormones sometimes, does what he can to help practically and emotionally.

If you think your feelings are irrational perhaps you need to speak to your health visitor because your baby does not sound like a problem sleeper.

Maybe stop expecting your 7 month old to do what you want and go with his flow for a few days to see if you feel better?

Oh, and ignore smug unhelpful friends talking about how their children sleep. It's all bollox- you only ever get the show reel of someone else's life, the real stuff is on the cutting room floor.

TheVanguardSix · 09/04/2019 07:34

Maybe you have a lark.
My 4 year old woke at 5am every day when he was a baby. But I’d also been up 9 times in the night with him every night for close to 3 years.
You have a great sleeper but an early riser.
You’re the one who needs to adapt, not your baby. Get a grip with the anger.
Blackout blinds probably won’t work because when he’s up, it’s dark anyway. So it’s not the light waking him up.
Adjust your routine. Sleep at 9-10pm. Prepare to wake up early. You’ll be less resentful if you prepare for how it is rather than hope for a change in habits.

SoyDora · 09/04/2019 07:45

What time do you go to bed? When mine woke up at 5 I made sure I was in bed for 9.30pm. Not ideal but still gave me a couple of hours wind down time in the evening (DH mainly worked away at that point so I ate dinner with the DC early).

darceybussell · 09/04/2019 07:49

Yes, put him to bed later. If he goes to bed at 9 he'll be up at 7, would that fit in better? I'm with the others who said they can't believe how much you're complaining and getting angry about an absolutely amazing sleeper who can sleep for ten hours straight!

Darkstar4855 · 09/04/2019 07:52

7-5 is really good for a baby of this age, as others have said. That’s 10 hours of night time sleep. Those mums whose babies sleep later in the morning have probably been up in the night for an hour or two so their babies need to sleep later in order to make up the hours.

He will nap after he’s been awake for 1.5-2 hours, that’s what babies do.

Sorry OP but your expectations are unrealistic. Either accept the 5am wake-up or shift his bedtime back to 8pm so it’s a 6am start instead. You will feel better if you stop wishing for the impossible and make the best of what you’ve got.

Mine was sleeping 7-5 with at least one wake at night. I would get up at 5, feed him then shower, clean up the kitchen, put the washing on etc. so I got all of the jobs out of the way for the rest of the day. I would go to bed a bit earlier in the evening so I still got enough sleep. He’s shifted to 8-6 since the clocks changed which is easier.

seeingdots · 09/04/2019 07:57

I agree the best thing to do here is adjust your expectations. I'm not surprised you're tired juggling a 3 year old as well but can't help being a bit at this given at 7 months my DC wouldn't sleep for longer than 1.5-2 h at a time and was still up about 5:30. Maybe try reading the Gentle Sleep Book. It helped me accept the shit sleeping until it got better.

Raspberry88 · 09/04/2019 09:32

Yeah, I agree with pp. I know that being tired is hard but 5 is a normal time for children to wake, even older children. I woke at 5 even into secondary school, used to read in bed when older but I'm afraid there's nothing you can do about babies and toddlers.

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