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Sleep

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Original poster

Feed to sleep association at 5.5 months - move rooms or camp out for good

34 replies

Jellybabie3 · 16/03/2018 08:48

Think i need a bit of reassurance.....
DS has always fed to sleep at night (not naps). He now feeds on his side, and when done rolls onto his back and i lift him into the next to me. I am 'OK' with this although he still wakes for feeds (he does feed of only a little) every 2 hours. He cant self settle. He is now getting too big for his cot so we were thinking of moving the cotbed in - it will be a massive squash but doable if it saves me getting up 3-5 times a night. My only worry is that me being there makea the night feeds worse and if he stays with us it wont be temporary.....

Any thoughts please?? I dont want any sleep training that involves crying. Pantley pull off worked for us although we had a recent wobble due to illness. I have tried leaving him to settle but to no avail.

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Original poster

Jellybabie3 · 16/03/2018 08:49

And I am back to work at 1 year old so would like some sleep routine by then!

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Original poster

Jellybabie3 · 16/03/2018 08:51

And by reassurance i mean 'its normal keep going' would be marvellous lol....

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crazycatlady5 · 16/03/2018 23:16

It’s normal keep going 😊 you have no idea how much things change between 5-12 months.

AlecOrAlonzo · 16/03/2018 23:44

There's no "For good" with bairns. It changes all the time. Do what suits you until it stops suiting and then just change it.

Original poster

Jellybabie3 · 17/03/2018 07:45

Oh god last night was ridiculus. Longest he slept was an hour and he fed for 45mins at some points in between.....worst its been for ages 😴 now i wish he had slept for 2 hour chunks. I'm really worried he is not getting enough sleep

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crazycatlady5 · 17/03/2018 08:28

What happens when he goes to sleep, are you lying down with him and then transfer him over? Does he stay asleep if he stays in bed with you?

crazycatlady5 · 17/03/2018 08:28

That’ll be the way to get the most sleep for everyone

Original poster

Jellybabie3 · 17/03/2018 09:01

Yeah hes moved all of 2ft in next to me crib asleep. He would happily stay but i cant sleep with him in the bed....and how would i stop him rolling out in a months time when the next to me goes? And we would have to go to bed at the same time??

He's woken with a beautiful smile so all is forgiven but I am worried about sleep deprivation for both of us.

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crazycatlady5 · 17/03/2018 09:05

and how would i stop him rolling out in a months time when the next to me goes you could get a bedguard which is what I did

I very rarely have gone to bed at the same time as DD, only when I’m knackered or she’s ill. She slept downstairs on me mostly until about 6/7 months, by which time I’d feed her to sleep upstairs and put the video monitor on. For a couple of months I’d be up and down resettling occasionally but by about 8 months it got better and she was sleeping long strestches, from about 7-1am and id have an evening, then snuggle up next to a warm baby when I got into bed

crazycatlady5 · 17/03/2018 09:07

Basically i got the most sleep possible in the first year by accepting the way things were - her sleep was also important to me so moving her around for hours on end when she clearly didn’t want to be moved didn’t work for me. She fed a lot in the night while cosleeping but she’d basicslly still be asleep while doing so, and I could drift back off quickly. Winner.

KTCluck · 17/03/2018 09:52

My DD is fed to sleep at night too. She’s 11 months and wakes a few times through the night. She is transferred to her cot so I can have a bit of an evening with DH downstairs then when she wakes (anywhere between 30mins to 2 hours later) I go upstairs and we co-sleep. She has done the waking every 45 minutes in the past but has gradually improved without me doing anything differently. The thing that helped me most was relaxing about it. I no longer look at the clock when she wakes and some mornings I have no recollection of how many times she woke. I’ve stopped trying to add up how many hours sleep either of us have had - she’s happy through the day and has two good naps so I’m just trusting she’s getting what she needs. I’ve been back to work a couple of months and am managing far far better than I thought I would! I spent too much time stressing about her sleep before I went back and really wish I hadn’t. It’s working for us. She’s just starting to doze off on her own every now and then rather than while feeding so I have faith she’ll stop needing fed to sleep completely when she’s ready.

I was also worried about her falling out the bed. She did once in the morning when she’d woken and wanted to play but I’d dozed back off - she landed on pillows I had on the floor and was absolutely fine (me not so much!). After that I started lying her cot mattress on the floor but she’s never done it again. I also tend to hold onto her sleeping bag and when I wake up I’m usually still holding on.

He’ll get there for you eventually, just do what gets you the most sleep now. Try not to notice the time or count the wake ups and it’s far easier to just doze back off to sleep.

GimbleInTheWabe · 17/03/2018 10:40

Waves to @Jellybabie3!
I made pretty much this same thread yesterday! I've decided to wait it out and try again.
Could he be about to teeth? DS' (also 5mo) sleep is so up and down. He's slept through for 3 nights in a row (thought I'd cracked it of course!) and then went back to sleeping like a newborn. His 'usual' is maybe 2 feeds a night.
Anyway the reason I ask about teething is that DS had 2 awful night of waking, being unsettled and eventually dropping back off to wake 45 mins later and then the next day his top two teeth had begun to come though, they're still working their way out now. His sleeping has gone back to his usual 2 wake ups but he was in the bed with us for 2 nights.
So yeah, keep going it's normal, but it does kinda suck (thank god they're so cute!).

Original poster

Jellybabie3 · 17/03/2018 11:05

@GimbleInTheWabe hi! I've just seen your thread......looks like we are both in the same boat. My DS only naps on me too!
Yup looks like we have to wait it out I'm really not keen on cosleeping....just because he wriggles so much and basically latches on/off all night which drives me potty!! I just cant drift off when i feel like i am being pecked like a carcass.....

Unfortunately my DSs 'normal' is 3-5 wake ups (average) since Christmas and he feeds like a trooper when he wakes (not comfort). But last night was more like 9 wake ups..maybe i should stop counting but man i am tired!!

Goodluck Gimble - when do you think you will try again??

It could be teething but cant see anything coming through yet. We have all 3 if us just got over a chest infection. He had antibiotics so i have coslept abit (he refused to be anywhere else but our bed) hes still sneezing so maybe hes still feeling under the weather but his medicine has just ran out. Poor little guy. I can see he is tired.

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Original poster

Jellybabie3 · 18/03/2018 14:22

So we had another bad night but i could hear his nose crackling. Doesnt seem to bother him during the day but obviously is still building up at night. I feel terrible for keep trying to put him in his bed but i cannot sleep with him next to me unless i literally nod off while feeding him from exhaustion. I really envy those of you that can lay cosleeping all night. Within 5min of me lying on my side in the right position i feel i want to move. I naturally want to sleep on my tummy.

Here's hoping his chest clears soon. Those 2 hour wake ups seem bliss now have to worry about where he will sleep at 6 month another day!

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GimbleInTheWabe · 18/03/2018 16:29

Sorry that it's still tough going @Jellybabie3. What's your routine of getting him in the cot? Have you tried sleeping with the bed sheets so they smell like you? Or a hot water bottle to warm DS' seat, as it were? I had an amazing pregnancy pillow called B.B. hug me which I use when I have to cosleep with DS and it's sooo much comfier than just lying on my side but you could probs get a similar effect by putting a pillow between your knees and ankles, maybe one behind your back so you have something to lean against iyswim.

DS is sleeping a bit better at night now, 4 wakes ups last night but one of them he went back to sleep with a back rub (unheard of even a week ago!). He's actually started doing this thing where, if I'm hugging him, he'll relax in to me by leaning him a head on me, does that make sense? Usually if I'd hold him his head would be up and looking around, but now when he's tired he'll snuggle in. It's adorable and means he gets sleepier on his own. Day naps are getting a bit easier as I've started to feed him to sleep lying down on the bed side by side. When he drops off I'll roll away, sometimes it works sometimes it doesn't. And i worry that the pillow buffer I build around him won't protect him but I check him every 10 mins and have the monitor on too.

It's so frustrating but I really think that it's just a long game.. my DS is changing every day atm so it must be exhausting for his noggin to keep up with it all.

How big is he though? Cos my DS is really long but still has quite a lot of space in the next to me (we had to swap from the snuzpod which was tiny and only last him 3months!)

Original poster

Jellybabie3 · 18/03/2018 20:49

Ok I didnt think of using my mat pillow. I will try that thanks.

He is just fed to sleep then lifted into his sleepyhead which is in the next to me. He is 97th percentile for height. The bottom of the sleepyhead is open. I would say he has maybe 2 inches spare before we need to sort his sleeping arrangements. We can put our cotbed in as a side car but i worry he will be with us forever!! We thought he would move at 6 months but with 6 wake ups a night its not gonna happen!! Just have to take it a week at a time. Even if he nails it now i am sure the next regression will change it!

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Original poster

Jellybabie3 · 18/03/2018 20:50

I havent done the tshirt trick since he was tiny - maybe i can do that. I thought he wakes alot because he can smell me though?? Hmm

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GimbleInTheWabe · 18/03/2018 22:44

Gosh he is a biggun then! We've been looking st the Mokee cotbed which looks quite good and affordable too. It's a small cotbed but I think it can be extended etc as they grow. We live in a one bed flat so Ds will be in our room until we move to a bigger place so we have the same problem with wanting to save on space as much as possible.

Do you think he's maybe still not totally over his infection and that's causing the extra clinginess? I know if my Ds is ever feeling under the weather he just refuses to settle in the cot, or only for v short bursts so he's straight in our bed for some uncomfy night sleep for everyone but him! Do you use the wonder weeks app? Can be useful sometimes though some of it I think is a bit baloney.

crazycatlady5 · 18/03/2018 23:49

but i worry he will be with us forever!!

😂

Oh jelly, he’s not gonna be getting into bed with you when he’s 21! You’re worrying way too much about it, I know plenty of bedsharing babes that have slept on their own since about 18/24 months x

Original poster

Jellybabie3 · 19/03/2018 03:31

Yeah hes long but skinny 25th percentile for weight. Well he slept alone for 2hr 45min but i just woke up 3 hours later with him in with me and no recollection of when he woke/fell asleep/got in. Doesn't matter of course but shows how tired i get i guess. But yes his nose sounds a little crackly when he feeds so he may still be under the weather bless him.

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Original poster

Jellybabie3 · 19/03/2018 03:33

I do have wonder weeks and hes in leap 5 but they are just bloody constant arent they. 😂😂

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kentgirl1 · 19/03/2018 05:48

I could have written this post!!!! DS is 5 months, only naps on me, wakes every 2 hours for feeds until 3am this morning, when he wakes every time I put him back in his cot!!! I'm so exhausted I just sit in bed with him and cry.

crazycatlady5 · 19/03/2018 07:01

Oh god I remember leap 5, that one was rough!

Original poster

Jellybabie3 · 19/03/2018 07:11

But there was no bloody relief from leap 3 or 4!

2 hr 45 was the longest stretch. Feel asleep with him after that (no idea how long for) then he did a 2 hours stretch then 45min and is up for the day

I am literally surviving on maybe 4 hours sleep or less (by the time i get my head back down) for 3 months. Sigh.

He was doing so well a few weeks ago. I could literally dump him in his bed almost asleep and he would sleep. He would feed and just go back off. Now he feeds or talks for up to an hour inbetween 1 - 2 hour sleeps.

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Original poster

Jellybabie3 · 19/03/2018 07:29

Poor little guy went to sleep at 10pm and up at 6.50am with 4 wake ups. Hes getting nowhere near enough sleep for his age.

Anyway worry over.....and on to tonight!!

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