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Original poster

The great non-sleepers... continued (again 😴)

999 replies

Jellybean2017 · 21/02/2018 01:32

New thread for night (and daytime!) chatter for those awake more than they'd like with a non sleeping baby/child 😊

My DS is six months. First baby likely to be only baby if I don't start getting more sleep! He is a nap and sleep fighter but incredibly cute so I choose to forgive him 😂

OP posts:
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6
Meepmoop · 07/03/2018 20:00

I'm currently doing the bedtime feed. DH finished work early today so I was looking forward to some family time however DS screamed uncontrollably for almost 2 hours!! No idea why as he was really happy when he finished, not sure DH is going to finish early again

I'm hoping for a good night but I'm not hopeful after the tears earlier

lizzlebizzle33 · 07/03/2018 20:03

@MummyCuddlesSolveEverything I hate it when Ds falls asleep really quick at night, you just know you will be up soon.

Good luck everyone with teething, colicky, virusy, grumpy, regressiony babies tonight, I hope you all get some rest, I hope I do too!!

MummyCuddlesSolveEverything · 07/03/2018 20:24

We've already had one wake up! I thought he would because he fell asleep so quickly

lizzlebizzle hope the cat nap helps. So sad to dread bedtime...I don't dread bedtime because he usually falls asleep fairly easily, but I dread night time.

meepmoop 2 hours!! How do they know when you're trying to do something nice?

WhoAteAllthePercyPigs · 07/03/2018 20:52

Hi all!

So last night went well with both DC sleeping at my parents...DD slept through and DS did a 5 hour stretch then 3 hours! was up for the day at 6 but who's counting I am obvs praying for the same tonight...

Mmm the old sleep training debate. From what I see on here, it's usually the parents with long term poor sleepers who are most against it, the ones for it have had good sleepers who have stopped sleeping - prob more a shock to the system! Personally, it isn't for us. Not to say I don't agree with it or judge anyone for doing it. I just know they'll get there in their own time, as long as I'm consistent with a routine. DD now sleeps through and on the nights she doesn't, I can usually identify what's wrong.

I guess I just feel that infant sleep is not a linear process; children will experience ups and downs with sleep and I find that people get perplexed when sleep goes screwy because 'but we trained them! How is this happening?' And that maybe obscures the real issues affecting sleep? I find that just rolling with the punches and co sleeping when needed is what works for us. Plus, having two DC has really shown me just how different babies are. I'm doing nothing differently with DS but he's taken better to this sleep thing than DD ok not great otherwise I wouldn't be on here.

But honestly - no judgement. Sleep deprivation is the pits as we all know, and if you think it's for you, go for it (but gently please!) There are some real arses on that thread - any sleep training thread usually attracts posters crying child abuse. No need at all.

Newmum26 · 07/03/2018 21:03

Hoping for good nights tonight everyone!
A lot of stirring and coughing in the monitor but no wake ups yet fingers crossed we get a decent block of sleep 🤞 x

UtterlyConfused111 · 07/03/2018 21:12

@haypanky
@amags
Interesting to see this debate for me because I just bought ferbers book. He has a case study in there that exactly describes DD2 situation. I know a tough couple of nights may well solve her problem but I just can’t make myself do it. DH (being a d1ckhead) says the sleep deprivation thing is there fore self inflicted and maybe it is but I just can’t seem to make myself do it... I can’t hear her cry- even if it’s a few minutes. Let’s see; I hope she gets better with time.

@cheshiremama
Being able to express a bottle and give it to my mum - even if during the day - made such a difference to me. If you can do it, go for it! If you can’t, well a bottle of formula is not the end of the world!

Haypanky · 07/03/2018 21:25

Ferber is the extreme end of the scale. There are lots of gentler ways.

Notmorewashing · 07/03/2018 21:46

Hi all, I have a poor sleeper 6m + never slept through and I’m back at work :(

I’ve come across people who are still up with kids school age and so I think this is just part of being a parent :o imagine when we can’t sleep as they are out at a bar etc..!!!

Just wanted to add that formula is not a magic cure for all and I was dissapointed when I found out that. I’m not convinced poor sleep is at all related to baby being hungry and that’s even with a baby who I have weaned.

I would continue with Breast and give in a bottle for a break for Mum.

FrozenMargarita17 · 07/03/2018 22:00

My 7m is ff and she is a terrible sleeper.

Pray for me tonight. She had weird naps today and we've been up about 10 times tonight already. Aghhhh.

cheshiremama89 · 07/03/2018 23:47

Thank you for your replies Thanks
Expressed about 5 oz today (3 and then 2) I can't seem to get any more than that in a sitting.
So my mum had him downstairs for the afternoon whilst I managed some naps.

Feeling more alive but the fear has set in about what's in store tonight Confused

Meepmoop · 08/03/2018 00:39

As predicted I'm not having a very good night. Currently on hourly wake ups with screaming in between.

I did fall asleep and dream that DS woke up with all his teeth. I think I've got his teething in my mind

Sakura03 · 08/03/2018 01:50

cheshiremama89 well done for expressing and that’s a good amount.I can’t remember exactly how old your lo is but I know he’s quite young (6 weeks??). I remember the early weeks so well, my ds could feed non stop and he was only 6.2 lb when born so I was petrified that my milk wasn’t enough for him. I worried so much and I would have the same conversations about it with dp over and over again, we’d agree that his nappies were fine, probably going through a growth spurt etc but by night time I would stress about it again and considered giving up bf. It didn’t help that my mum and brother kept saying why don’t you give him formula. I persevered and he’s always had good weight gains, I get him weighed every 3 weeks. I’m really glad I didn’t ditch the bf but it was tough, quite often made worse due to the lack of sleep but then I discovered feeding lying down which helped when I hadn’t had much sleep as then I could at least get some rest. My ds is now 16 weeks and he’s just started feeding loads again in the evenings but I don’t mind, as I know it will pass. I’m going to start expressing again as I haven’t been out on my own yet and it would be nice to be able to go out for a bit. Hang in there, you can do it, but only you will know if it’s time to go onto formula, in the end of the day you have to do what it right for you- happy mum happy baby!

Sakura03 · 08/03/2018 01:56

I forgot to mention that I started using a sling for ds around 6 weeks, it was brilliant, it meant that I could get things done around the house also taking ds out in the pram was a godsend I could pop to a cafe, go shopping etc but obviously that won’t help you getting more sleep unless you can get your dp or someone else to take him out on the pram.

WhoAteAllthePercyPigs · 08/03/2018 04:28

So when will I ever learn..the first rule of Sleep Club is: you don't boast about how well it's going - after the success of last night, tonight has been a bit rubbish with DS. But I was awake for the first part of the night - can't blame him for that. Yawn. Oh well. Not too full a day ahead so hopefully I can rest at some point.

@Cheshiremama I second everything @sakura said about bf. DS was 5 pounds 4 when he was born, so I was obvs very keen to get him gaining weight. Which he is, like a champ! Moving up the percentile chart and unrecognizable from the tiny baby he was. It's amazing how your body works to give them exactly what they need.

I was giving a bottle of formula in the evening but have stopped as he refuses the bottle now, and it wasn't really making a difference to his sleep. The longer stretches he's done of late have all been down to breastfeeding. So it's easy to see ff as a magic bullet but there are no guarantees. You are doing an amazing job, it will get easier i promise!

FrozenMargarita17 · 08/03/2018 06:49

Awful, awful night. I could cry. Struggling badly.

NinaMarieP · 08/03/2018 07:21

Apart from needing his dummy a few times and waking once briefly at 5am he essentially slept through again, 10.35-6.50.

Of course I was awake half the night coughing again and so did not enjoy seven or eight hours of peaceful bliss... bet he stops sleeping through when my cough is gone!

Emberblu · 08/03/2018 07:47

@cheshiremama89 that's a great amount to express! I could only ever get 1-2 oz A DAY when expressing so you're doing amazing. I'm sure baby Cheshire is fine. ds didn't gain weight for 8 weeks which is why we switched to formula but if he had gained, even though breastfeeding was hard and he fought me a lot and was making me sore even at 16 weeks, I would have stuck with it. It's made no difference to sleeping but my mental state is much better since I can take breaks, go out alone etc. So maybe a bottle/ syringe feed when you need a break would help you :) but it has to be YOUR choice BrewCake

tealandteal · 08/03/2018 08:30

DS was up every hour until midnight, then at 4.30. I woke him up at 6.30 to try and crack the napping today. We have swimming as well not sure if it will help or not.
Frozenmargarita I have found on really bad days it helps to rest when DS naps, he doesn't usually go down long enough for me to nap but if you can, just sit down, have a drink, don't worry about tidying or anything just have a rest. (if you are able!)

That said yesterday I did manage a nap and when I woke up the dog had been sick on the stairs.

FrozenMargarita17 · 08/03/2018 09:46

@tealandteal yeah I nap with her every day either the whole thing or partly. My DH didn't even get up until 9:20 when I went in the bedroom confused and then stood there silently furious. He works from home but starts at 8. When I ask him to do baby things on a wfh day he says he's working. If he wants to go on a bike ride or do some DIY though.. there's always time..

Sakura03 · 08/03/2018 10:15

Ds’ behaviour and sleeping patterns are just so random at the moment, yesterday he was definitely less fussy and clingy, happily played on his own for a bit but come evening he was totally wired. For the last 10days or so he’s been sleeping from about 7 pm but last night he didn’t calm down until nearly 10 pm. I had to go off to the bedroom, keep the light off and feed him lying down and that calm him down and we could return to the lounge and feed until I transferred him to his carrycot. We were up at 1-2am, he actually slept again after 1/2 hour but I was on here😁 hence not going off to bed until 2 am. Ds then totally surprised me by sleeping until 6.15 am!!! The previous night he was awake every 50 minutes and then did a 2 hours sleep, this is what I mean sooo random. It was a very stinky baby I picked up this morning though, he’d done a massive 💩 that had gone all up his back and getting him out of his clothes was so grim poor little boy... he is currently asleep on me and has been for about an hour while I watch YouTube videos🙈🙈🙈 and have breakfast. I managed press 4 oz from one boob this morning, only because dc hadn’t fed since 1 am so my dp can give him a bottle tonight. Last time dp gave him a bottle he rejected it, but was happy to feed of me, I’m so hoping it was a one off and not him not wanting to take bottles anymore... We’ll know tonight.

We’re off out today, I want to check out Hobbycraft to see if they’ve got christening table decorations and possibly some bunting (I love buntings), then pop in to Homesense and Asda and finally go to John Lewis, well that’s the plan anyway. Hope you all have a lovely day.

Sakura03 · 08/03/2018 10:18

Argg...should say managed to express...

UtterlyConfused111 · 08/03/2018 10:22

@frozenmargarita
My DH is exactly the same re wfh.... he’s such a d1ck about it!

cheshiremama89 · 08/03/2018 11:23

Thanks so much @Emberblu @WhoAteAllthePercyPigs @Sakura03

I have got the sling out today and am really enjoying it!

I've actually managed to get a few bits done this morning.

Introducing one formula feed early evening so that DH can do it while I get an hour or so before bed.

Hope everyone has a better night tonight x

FrozenMargarita17 · 08/03/2018 12:15

@UtterlyConfused111 it's absolutely infuriating but I can't say anything !

MummyCuddlesSolveEverything · 08/03/2018 14:13

utterlyconfused frozenmargarita my dh is exactly same. He works (studies) from home. He's 'always busy', but not too busy for lie ins, going out when it suits him, having 2 hour naps etc. Apparently I'm lucky that he's at home, and I get lots more help than other mums because of that (so should cope better!) He is deluded if he thinks that sitting upstairs in his office then coming down for lunch/dinner and playing on his phone before going back upstairs while I do everything is helping. I think being at home makes them think they are doing more when really it's an excuse to do less.
Cheshire I'm glad the sling is working for you, I found it really helpful to be able to get on with things and actually get off the sofa!