Right tell me how to do this AP parents...want ds and dd in own room and me and dp in SAME room

[FillyjonkIsMilitantAboutFruit]

right i am sharing rather a lot here in an attempt to get some help. anyone mocks me for my hardcore lentilly nightime parenting, i shall get a pitchfork out

ok

since dd was born 21 months ago, dp has been sharing a room with ds (3.5 ) , dd with me. Because, tbh, that was the ONLY sodding way to get some sleep. Both of my kids are utterly, utterly, crappola sleepers, which is probably in part due to me needing only about 6 hours sleep a night.

But now, bascially, I want dp and me in the same room, and the kids in a room of their own (only 2 bedrooms).

So how do we achieve this?

Here are the problems.

1. Ds will not let ANYONE except dp put him to bed. He has a complex ritual involving stories.

1. dd will not let ANYONE except me put her to bed and furthermore is usually still fed to sleep. This could possibly change, there is scope for her to have her feed earlier and then go to bed without a feed.

1. The stories are important but the kdis squabble over which story and dd has little concept as yet of turn taking, your story next etc. Of course we are working on that but in the interim, it means bedtime stress.

oh and i'd like one parent to be able to do the whole bedtime ritual so that the other could bugger off the the gym or something.

hmm. I need to work out my own thoughts here really, yours also greatly appreciated,

but i htink you imagien these scnarios
i woudl say to MIl oh " ds3 need to do xyz before he will go ot bed"

you feck off and thent hey dont giev a hsit

HOOOOOOLD on

so your plan involves first bringing them BOTH back into YOUR room?

nonononononononononononono

that's not right

hmm left to their own devices mrsA, NEITHER naps. dd has not napped without intervention since about 10 months.

but I can bring it about through timely driving of the car in circles round the block

but aaargh then ds doesn't sleep til past 9 so that is not a goer.

adn "! months wiht your dh in antoher room ix VERY VERY BAD

Wow, respect nappies

Should also add, ds and dd1 shared from when dd2 was born, so they were just 4 and just 2. DS got his own room 2 years later and now the girls share. On both occasions we just did it.

you rae a lackey to your kids
stand up to them
stop mincing aroudn DRIVING your kids to sleep ffs

not into my room?

oh feck is that not good?

I have just filled their room with crap cos of my ceiling issues

and there is no space for a futon in their room

oh feck

parenting is quite hard, isn't it?

Hello Filly

Agree with Franny (quelle surprise!) - get them sleeping in the same room first. You feed dd to sleep in said room at 6pm then sneak off, then dp put ds to bed in same room at 7pm (unless story time is too noisy?) It would still be musical beds later on in the night though wouldn't it for a bit? I think it would be quite a while before the whole bedtime could be done by just one parent tbh, unless they take to the idea miraculously quickly.

bung them both in together with one parent doing bedtime, take it in turns and see who is more successful (your methods will differ) the loser/winner gets to do bedtime forevermore while the other one cleans the kitchen.

what WERE oyu thinking of?

go out and tell dh ot get on wiht it liek ost folk do
they wont die

Presumably you could never have a 3rd child in this scenario?? You'd have to move in an au-pair just to take over one of the bedtime routines

no oyu d say "oi kids ffs go to bed" and go out and get hammered with your mates

I have no idea .

Currently I sit on dd1's bed (aged3) whil feeding dd2 (7 months) telling stories till they are both asleep.

It is actually easier if dd2 goes to bed first as I have more focus on dd1 and she knows it.

Could you sort out dd first (into bed in shared room ds joining in with her stories ot not as he sees fit) then do whatever it is that ds does before quitely reading him stories in the same room - or is that ridiculous?

I would have thought that if dd2 is asleep at 6 you could feed her then leg it.

why are you a green bird with rod hull's arm up your arse, cod? just out of interest? god things have changed since i was last here

Oops here we go, trouble

out you go Missy Cod

go on, go quietly now or we'll hoick you out by the arse of your saggy Gap jeans

no i am stunne dthat you ever thought what was goin on was a Good Idea.

i relaly mean it
go out
tell fh to put hem to bed( or vice versa) the kids will have to get used toit

ah here is what concerns me re the later bedtime

dd will get woken up.

I can't even feckin KNIT when she is sleeping, its a nightmare.

Seriously, what would you or DP do if the other one was called to an ailing parent's bedside? You'd get on with it and the kids would be fine because they'd have to be.

Honestly, just do it. Considering you're prepared to lie with them/feed them/do whatever else it takes, I really can't see why you're hesitating?

Feck naps if it means your evening is stuffed been there done that.

DD will be dropping with tiredness with no nap so just bolt after she is asleep prob solved.

Filly it's not wrong to have them both in your room, of course

but if your ultimate goal is to have them both in their own room, then it seems to me that moving ds into your room in order to later move him back is just mean, and unnecessarily hassley

it's turning out like the fox, the chickens and the grain going over the river in one boat otherwise

im wiht zog
sorry didn tknwo you arent alwoed to post on certain threads

Oooh dd is one of those children

Is ds read to sleep?

I'd put both of them to bed at 6.30 for now, with an aim of stretching to 7 if your dd copes with it.

If you do want to change the 'rituals' it's just a case of telling the children and bearing any tears, I think.

i had a job a while back which was evenings, so had no choice but for dh to do bedtimes for ds, who i think was two then. We swapped to dh a week or so before we needed to, and bedtime had always been me so there was a strong routine there to break, and ds had big tears when I said it was daddy for stories. However these did not last for hours, only minutes, he cut his coat according to his cloth and took comfort from his dad.

So I think it's a case of telling them what will happen and then sticking it out. You are not doing anything bad or remotely harmful, it's only one or the other loving and doting parent reading them stories and putting them to bed; either way, they are winning and being parented damn well. So don't feel bad if there are some tears.

Perhaps I've got a stick up my ass or something tonight because I also feel with your dd, that she will have to learn to accept what happens....she can have her stories first perhaps as she's so young, then your ds has his; I remember this happening with my mum and I just lolled against her listening to the slightly older stories, most of it going over my head, but i was having a cuddle and I was comfortable....no problem. perhaps give her the choice of sitting with you or playing quietly with a chosen toy?

you lot

thoguth co leeping was great?