Sorry message cut short:
All the parenting sites say No naps after 4pm. Also, I'm doing controlled crying with gradual technique with sitting near his cot and singing. It's going well but it's the 2nd time I'm doing it. I did it when he was younger and it was great for few months but now crying at bedtimes ( separation anxiety). Even when he has had a nap 2-3pm he still cries at bedtime so not sure if it's separation or over tiredness.
It's really stressing me with the confusion. I feel anxious about bedtimes now and dread the evenings. I know he will out grow this stage but it ruins my day and thoughts.