4MO inconsolable late afternoon

[TeaMuncher]

DS is 4m and has never napped (or fed) particularly well in the daytime. A good nap is 30mins and he feeds probably 3/4 times a day for 5-10mins (EBF). I have tried everything to get him to sleep and feed more, sought advice from everywhere, and the conclusion is always "maybe he's just like that", which I have come to terms with now. (nappies and weight gain are fine btw). However...

For the past few days, he has been inconsolable at about 4:30/5pm, weirdly straight after he wakes from his forth and final nap it starts as a whimper then just gets progressively worse until he's barely breathing Then he passes out (usually I am lying on my bed feeding him to soothe him at this stage) and is then out for a few hours (missing his usual bathtime/ bedtime routine).

He has been super drooly which could indicate teething, but it's weird that he's fine during the rest of the day/night. Would be surprised if he's in pain (although it seems that way) for the same reason. Could it finally be tiredness catching up on him?

Not sure what on earth to do!

My little girl (nearly 6 months) is much more cranky around this time, and has been on and off for a couple of months. Maybe not usually as bad as you describe, but we certainly have some very difficult evenings. I think it is overtiredness as I find if I can fit an extra nap in during the day it does help her mood in the evening. But then she seems to want to be up about 4am so you can't win! It's really hard to get the balance of naps right at this stage I think. So I'm afraid I don't have much to offer than perhaps try and play around with nap times! And hopefully as they get older they might settle into longer naps which might help.

Thanks Octopus. It's so bloomin hard to know isn't it?! Argghhhh

30 minute naps are quite normal and not a problem. To avoid over tiredness they key is not making naps longer, it is making naps closer together.

So try to limit awake time, from waking from one nap to being asleep for the next nap, to as short as possible. At 4 months awake time wants to be an hour at most. That includes the time it takes you to get baby to sleep.

Some babies indeed would "just like that" and need less sleep. Babies should be happy and contented. Some babies are happy and contented on less sleep than others. It's just that your baby doesndoesn't seem to be. The early evening screaming is probably down to a need to feed or sleep or both. Over tiredness is likely to be a factor. Likewise evening cluster feeding is normal in the early evening - the end to just sit and feed constantly for several hours.

When my DD was 4mo she was napping every 1h15m or so. She would sleep for about 30-40 mins which i guessed was one of her sleep cycles. Every now and then she would go 1h20, but nothing could predict when!
Sometimes she would bypass her afternoon nap going from 3pm to bedtime around 6 (time depending on crankiness) and she would be okayish. Often just super happy that bedtime was underway!
She's now only 5 months and going longer between naps, but i just follow her lead and put her down when i can tell she needs to sleep.
I'm sure her naps will sort themselves out. She happily sleeps through the night too. But that's all her. Can't take credit for that.