new 'SLEEP IS FOR THE WEAK' thread

[tibsy]

hi ladies, the other one ran out of space, so if no one else starts a new thread, here it is....

ill join in its been busy but situation the same still if anyone remembers me. tried to post last week but seem to have forgotten password. time is flying so fast - must rush off and pick up ds from school. thought i would ask how everyone is going? cruisemum - any breakthrough yet? has everyone got a plan yet or doing something already? be back later if im not too tired. must now try and sneak dd off boob asleep and into car seat otherwise she'll be crying and grumpy while i wait at school for ds - how embarrassing - everyone looks! keep saying it but need to get sorted and a kick up the bum to get started! c y'all soon

Thought I might say hi - my lo is 8 months and really does not believe in sleep. My husband wants to go down the cc route but I can't bear it. He sleeps for about 1-3 hours at a time at night and 30-90mins in the day. His favourite is waking at 4am - wide awake and chatty - for about an hour or so whilst I beg him to go to sleep.

hi ladies, glad to see you both again altho not cos of lack of sleep iykwim
more later, dd just woken and a bit cranky.......

Hey guys, just to say hi and got new thread! Been hectic, tiring, etc etc, but hopefully back for a bit! Will catch up later today properly when I have caught up with all the postings etc.
Take care for now

Cruise & Tibsy, if it's any comfort, my DD does self settle sometimes and not others. Theres no pattern to it and she's just as likely to wake up as frequently if she's settled herself than if I've had to work at it. Sometimes it astonishes me that I can put her in her cot wide awake, no dummy, leave the room and she just drops off other times she throws a complete paddy and I have to hold her 'til she's asleep.

Last night she slept from 10.30 - 4.00 (fed)but was then awake for about an hour. I got a trifle naffed off did a spot of LOUD whispering with DH and she eventually went to sleep with us 'til 6.30 but she was a fidget. She seems to be getting into a pattern of being awake for an hour during the night. She's not crying just talking, squealing and then grizzling if we don't respond. I know the answer is probably to put her in her own room but I just know I'll be up and down ALL the time. Plus we sleep in the loft (converted!) and her room is on the floor below and I don't feel happy about that.

Cruise, I try not to feed DD by giving her a dummy. If she doesn't settle I'll feed her. (I've only succeeded twice not feeding) I know that doesn't help you because you are being used as the dummy. Did you read my previous post about a friends LO that was doing exactly the same as your DS?

My friends came at the weekend and their DD slept through from about 4 weeks and she was BF which blows that theory out of the water.

hi! found you! more later....bathtime

i have started a new thread entitled 'has anyone got an experience of frequent night wakers stopping of their own accord! I doubt there will be many takers

wow we got so big we had to start a new thread!!!

well managed to get lo off to sleep again with swaddling which I haven't tried for a long while and tried it again later in the day as still tired and he went down much better. not holding my breath that this is the miracle I've been waiting for tho...

it's all very well these people that write the books saying that babies need to learn to settle themselves to sleep and develop their own soothing techniques but how do we tell this to the babies? almost 6 months now and lo has made no sign of learning either...

hi lovefamily & lori welcome to the club but sorry you're here iykwim

good luck with your thread cruise...

and the gangs all here!!!!
just need bampa, genlay and the others to pop their heads around the door.

ginger - i was wondering about the relationship between sleeping thru the night and ffing. at the groups i go to and in my own experience, it does seem that more ff babies sleep thru than bf, but not always the case obviously.

kiera, glad you had a good result with swaddling. fingers x'd for a bloody good night for us all. think we all deserve it. tried to have a siesta earlier with dd but the tossers next door kept me awake climbig on the roof of their extension.

ruth2007 and maebee too...

Tibsy, SIL is training to be a midwife and she said that ff babies do settle for longer because formula is bulkier (I guess with the added fats) and therefore more difficult to digest so LO's sleep for longer. I guess this is true in the first few weeks when they only sleep and eat and maybe that's what gets them into the habit of being good sleepers when they're a bit older.

DD had a stick of cauliflower, broccoli and a stick of pumpkin for tea. I said had it. She mostly sucked and smeared it around the table. Lets see if it makes her sleep better.

ginger, ds was ff and slept LOADS better than dd, but am glad that have managed to bf this time tho. am trying to introduce 'whole' foods as well as the puree stuff, but cauliflower makes dd fart lots!!!
she's had quite a bit to eat today, so am hoping that she wont be waking out of hunger. my mothers helpful comment of the week was 'perhaps you should try to feed her up during the day so shes not hungry at night'......you think?!!

tibsy - I question the ff/bf theory as my dd was bf until 4.5 months and slept through from 11 weeks 7 - 7!. She is still a fantastic sleeper at age 9 years. I believe it is a combo of luck of the draw and the disposition of the lo. I have done nothing any differently than with dd but ds is a different child....bless his little cottons ! Glad we are finding our way over here!

btw - lol at your mil's groundbreaking idea

oops sorry - your mother's!

OK, back on for a while now. Just had egg sarnie as could not be assed to cook.
WOW I got lots to read, but in the meantime...
LO in her own room, still! Its been bloody hard, and she has fought it, and we have given a couple of times, but the last two nights we did this (might be baby whisperer ish? I must confess I have not read the book yet...:

Night 3 - HELL

Night 4 - 3 nights of torture and finally despair at ever getting to sleep again, afraid to go to sleep as she would no doubt wake up (you all know that one...)

7:30pm - fell asleep on boob after becoming far far more active. 8:30pm - top-up BF after realising she missed it.
10:30pm - woke crying her head off, settled with bf.
12:00am woke up crying, very angry sounding cry. Tried bf, did not work, but she wanted to suckle all night. tried rocking, cluddling, shh'ing, did not work. DP tried it, she cried even louder. I put her in cot, she rolled over, got up, I put her back, she rolled over, got up, so it went...I then pretty much laid in the cot with her, shh'ing, talking gently, telling her to sleep, I love you (thinking 'go to 'f'ing sleep!') she became calm, giggled, and was wide awake! I then wrapped her in her blanket (also has sleeping bag) so she could not use arms, she then made her sleepy noises until I moved away, so stayed with her until she just stared at her night light. Left the room with her still awake.
1:45am - awake but not crying, talking to herself.
2am - alseep, all by herself , woke a couple of times, made a noise, back to sleep.
6am - woke up, came to bed, had BF. Awake.

Day 5
7:30pm - asleep on boob, out like a light.
8:30pm - woke for missed bf.
10:30pm - BF straight to sleep
12:00am - woke up yelling angily again, cuddled her, put her down, she got up, etc etc, wrapped her up (only tucked undeneath so she could free arms if she wanted), she cooed, made cute sleepy noises and went to sleep. No bf offered.
12:20pm
2am - STILL asleep
4:45am - woke up, hungry sound, BF for 10 mins, awake, put her down, kissed and shh'd her, sleep.
7am - awake in cot playing on her own.
7:30am - gets up with DP.
9:00am - I AM still asleep.

YAY! - I feel lots better, but its not cracked yet....

In 5 years have had only 1 unbroken night's sleep. First pregancy, then dd (bf) only started sleeping through aged 3, by which time heavily pregnant with 2nd. Now she's 17 months. Guilty of b'feeding her during night to get her back to sleep. Apart from her ONE night of sleeping through, she's been waking between two and SEVEN times a night. CAN'T GO ON LIKE THIS! Last night fed her, but put her down awake. Cried for 15 LONG mins, then in the night for 5 and 3 only. Tonight only cried for 5 when I put her down but I think I could be IN FOR IT later! Can anyone tell me it's going to be ok?!

Keira - OMG just saw you did swaddling too! I have not tried it for a long time, but it seemed to work for two nights in a row.
Is it still working?

Oh, and LO walked this week for the first time, two steps from Winnie the Pooh train to DP holding on to our fingers (only holding on we did no helping whatsoever). I cried, she is truly truly amazing. Even when I am exhuasted.

where is everyone, is there stuff actually worth watching on tele tonight?!!

dandasmummy - welcome (have you been here before, I dont recognise your name, I am quite new too). If you want answers, I have none, if you want hugs and some matchsticks to keep your eyes open, I have plenty to go around!

danda - so sorry to have to welcome you . we are all in the same boat here. some have managed to crack the night wakings and abandoned ship but the rest of us remain here begging for an answer! maybe you are getting there with your leaving her to cry thing. I hope so, you must be shattered. I bf ds to sleep (he is 6 months) and i am positive that this is where hte prob lies. thing is i have a dd age 9 and she has to get up for school so i do what is quickest and quietest to get ds back to sleep. sorry i don't have any answers here but ifyou trawl through the thread (and previous one) you will prob find some tactics that have worked for others. Good luck!

pavlov - your night still looks horrendous but at least you are making progress. I think the trick now is to continue and not revert to old ways. Well done

morning
and welcome to d&a. sorry to hear that you need to join us tho 5 years, dear god, i thought 6 months was bad!! as cruise says, a good idea to trawl thru previous threads, as we and others who have left have had some good ideas...

we had a relatively good night last night, and actually had an evening where i wasn't climbing up the stairs every hour!!

6.45pm bed
10.30pm bed (me)!
11.45pm fed in bed with me
3.15am fed
5am woke (no fed!)
6.30am woke for day

she called out a few times over the evening but didnt wake and was fine by time i got to the bottom of the stairs! had given her some meds before bed as full of cold and teething again, so was probably that, also put some clary sage oil in the room which is quite a sleepy oil so may have been that....then again, may have been cos there was an M in the day of the week, who blinking knows

pavlov, sounds like you're getting there, don't give up, even if you're tired....keep on it sister!!!