10m old waking lots screaming for me.

[winefixeswhine]

Hi there. My 10m old was initially cosleeping, then crib next to me, then crib across the bedroom then cot in own room but just before cot in own room (about 3 weeks ago) has started waking more and more. Last night she woke six times between 7:30-23:00. She stands up and wails til I pick her up and then falls immediately asleep. I put her down, go back to bed, half hour later she's wailing again. If I bring her in my bed she sleeps well.
I'm back to work in six weeks and really would like her sleeping in her bed. She's breastfed, eating solids well, I try to unlatch before totally asleep.
And ideas? Crying it out is not my cup of tea.

If you want her sleeping independantly in the cot, getting her to go to sleep in the cot is going to be The Answer.

Google "Pantly Pull Off" for a very gentle technique.

I read the no cry sleep solution yesterday. Have been doing the ppo for a while. I don't think the problem is suck to sleep as when she wakes I pick her up, she falls straight to sleep I put her down, :'so it's not like she thinks she needs to suck to fall asleep. More than she needs me.

She needs to go from awake to asleep in the cot.

Her going to sleep in your arms means that when she moved between sleep cycles and realised she's no longer in your arms, she freaks out.

If upu don't feel you can tackle the idea of putting her in the cot awake, and doing all the settling with her in the cot and you leaning into the cot (but not picking her up), then just embracing cosleeping might be your best answer.

Yes I think I'm going to need to try getting her down totally awake, you're right, although she screams like a banshee so it will go down like a lead balloon. She naps like a dream though, Mysterious. Thanks for taking the time to reply.

Could it be separation anxiety, OP? It sounds like she's been sleeping alright in the cot until now. Might explain why she's suddenly waking up and crying between sleep cycles, and why she sleeps better when you're co-sleeping. Could be a case of riding out this phase for a few weeks.

In the mean time, could it be worth starting to condition a comforter/object that reminds her of you if you haven't already? This is one of the suggestions from NCSS I'm working on with my DS at the mo...

Yes I thought maybe Sep anx could be part of it. It's just a desperate need for me when she wakes. Daddy wont do at all she screeches at him. Have started with a lovey too. Hopefully it's a phase, she did always sleep 7-2 in the cot then feed 2am/5am for months. But it's just getting worse. She's also almost learning to walk and has got 6 teeth in two months. It's all going on 😖

It will get better. Around 12 months I was still feedin to sleep but then started pick up put down with me on the room. So they cry, you shush them gently and offer reassuring words but lay them back down. And repeat. Every few days move further towards the door.
It takes quite a few Fuad but they do get it. If you do this at bedtime, she'll eventually get it and be able to settle again in the middle of the night

Weeks not faud

Thanks. I tried what you suggested FATE tonight- fed her but kept her awake then put her in cot and got down on floor and chatted a bit played a bit then let her get tired with lovey in hand and then didn't pick her up again. She cried a little but I leant in and soothed her without lifting her and she actually settled in not much time, and laid down not facing me and fell asleep. Thank you for that suggestion!! Fingers crossed.

And don't forget that you have to follow the same principle for night wakings. I've made that 'mistake' - DS goes down fine solo at bedtime so I thought 'he self settles just fine! Why is he waking so much in the night?' 🤔 But I was feeding him back to sleep at night wakes then putting him back in his cot asleep, and so he now has issues re-settling independently during the night. Two different things.

Just thought I'd mention that because it's a misunderstanding that has caught me out.

Thanks.
We have had three nights of her going to sleep in the cot and she's taken to it really, surprising well. Feed, chat, play with teddies, into cot, and she just lays down and goes to sleep. Last night slept 7-7 with feeds at 12 and 4. This is a massive improvement, and she's never slept til 7 before! Thanks :)

Fantastic. Well done you!