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Can I please have your honest opinions on CC? HV is recomending I am not sure.

374 replies

eenybeeny · 02/03/2007 12:47

My HV is recomending CC for my 6 month old.

Our problems with his sleep are these:

  1. He only naps in his pram. He screams and screams when I try to get him to nap in his cot during the day.
  1. He wakes up to 6 times a night for one thing or another.
  1. He wakes anywhere from 3 a.m. to 5 a.m. and is ready for the day.

Please give me any advice you have and let me know... is CC cruel? I really dont know. Normally, the thing is, when he cries I want to rush to him to help him. I dont know if I can leave him to cry. Please help!

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Monkeytrousers · 09/03/2007 23:12

Oh no, sorry I know that. That our 'modern' brains have hardly adapted since the Pleistocene - that is scientifically true. But what is the controversy here?

Monkeytrousers · 09/03/2007 23:12

or here

bloss · 10/03/2007 01:22

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bloss · 10/03/2007 01:24

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hunkermunker · 10/03/2007 01:27

Can I just say that I've been leaving you ALL to cry since the thread started and there's not ONE hope of any of you sleeping through yet.

bloss · 10/03/2007 01:31

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kiskidee · 10/03/2007 02:40

daddyj, if you go to Dr James Mckenna's website, you will have a better idea of what a sleep lab looks like. Notre Dame University where the lab is located is one of the most highly respected in the US.

kiskidee · 10/03/2007 02:45

and if you look at a current series on one of the4 terrestrial stations (can't remember which one) there is a program called 'sleep clinic'.

kiskidee · 10/03/2007 02:51

bloss, i have never relied on any study which mentioned romanian children in orphanages. any information i have used in these discussions come from sites on the net.

the are: dr james mckenna's
the natural child project
bawling babies
dr catherine dettwyler
the continnum concept

you can look yourself. i have not yet found anything on any of these sites which has said anything about studies of romanian babies. you are drawing a conclusion from i don't know where.

yes, innovate means to create something new. a three year old can innovate. what he he innovates may be as old as the hills to me or you but brand new to him! after all, i am sure neither you or your mum taught your sis to vomit to try to get her way

kiskidee · 10/03/2007 02:59

i didn't quite understan your question beachcomber but this article gives a good idea of what Mayan sleep practices.
here

it also touches on other cultures or sub-cultures in Western societies like the Pakistani and Bangladeshi communities in the UK and Appalachian communities in Eastern Kentucky, E. Tennessee and Virginia. They are European descent communities (mostly Scots) which have remained very cohesive since they first arrived in the US after the Jacobean Rebellion.

kiskidee · 10/03/2007 03:43

I'm not suggesting that babies vomit to manipulate, of course, but only that vomiting in some children is not a sign of severe distress. Ds was much more vomity than dd, for instance. Just be careful about generalising here...

I have seen enough threads saying that parents have tried CC. their child was hysterical and when they went in, to check as they were supposed to do, the child had vomited in the cot so they stopped doing cc.

do you think the baby was pulling out all the stops to get mummy to come in? an for argument's sake 8 or 10 month old?

yes the child could have vomited because for example ff makes a lot of babies more vomity but would the child still vomit in the cot if cc wasn't taking place? probably not as the parent would have seen it happen before and often enough before to have probably gone to the doctor to check the baby for reflux. so when a parent comes here and says my child vomited because he was so upset, i tend to believe her.

I vomited when i was in labour - and my labour was effing horrible. i'd say i was in distress and my hospital notes say so too.

i have also vomited after running too fast for too long. I would call that extreme physical stress too.

kiskidee · 10/03/2007 03:43

sorry, the first two lines of my last post are quotes from bloss a while ago and i promised her i'd return to it.

bloss · 10/03/2007 06:57

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bloss · 10/03/2007 07:00

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bloss · 10/03/2007 07:01

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Monkeytrousers · 10/03/2007 08:39

I think Zippi's point was a good one actually. Like anything, if you stop fighting the inevitable, you save a lot of energy and can begin to cope a lot better.

bloss · 10/03/2007 08:42

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Monkeytrousers · 10/03/2007 08:49

Well, god forbid you should try to relax by any means possible..

zippitippitoes · 10/03/2007 08:50

I don't see anything patronising in what I've said. I am offering some support to the op. I haven't said anything about it being a parent's or anyones fault that a child wakes and cries and disturbs parents at night. And it does seem to be a little lost on this thread that it is absolutely normal for babies, young children and adults to wake throughout the night. Whether they fully wake, wake others etc depends on a range of things.

Understanding a little of the context in which you experience a child's sleep problems is helpful. If you don't find it helpful then ignore it..I'm not being in the least patronising or dogmatic. I am putting a point of view which I have learned and others have learned helps.

Monkeytrousers · 10/03/2007 09:14

I found it helped

bloss · 10/03/2007 09:23

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Monkeytrousers · 10/03/2007 09:30

Well you're right - but I don't think that was what Zippi was saying.

bloss · 10/03/2007 09:47

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Sakura · 10/03/2007 13:45

DaddyJ,
I was reading through this whole thread but I balked at reading your precise and measured argument in favour of controlled crying, and I think its no coincidence at all that you are a man.
After having a baby myself, there is no doubt in my mind that CC goes against every grain of instinct in the mother`s body. Whether she is strong enough to stand it is another thing, but it is so unnatural and goes against the grain.
Before I had my child I had no real opinion on CC. I am a quiet kind of person who would avoid any confrontation before. Not since having my baby. Now I can deal with any situation that would distress my baby, whether its doctors, relatives or (even) my MIL. My instinct and need to take my baby back into my arms at once has shocked me. I literally could not stand hearing her cry. MY DH, god love him, as much as he is a good, hands on father, he has never felt like this in quite the same way.
So I find it slightly insulting for a man to come on here and defend CC. SOrry, but I do.

Sakura · 10/03/2007 13:48

And of course, no coincidence at all that the person who invented the damn idea was a man, and other female gurus who advocate it have no babies of their own.