Please help-desperate

[Addi13]

Hi,

I made a thread a few days ago but things have progressed since then.

My DD is 5 weeks old. She will not sleep in her cot, we've tried everything! My HV suggested getting into a routine from 7pm (!) which many people shot down on here for being ridiculous.

DD now won't settle in bed next to me either.

In desperation, we've started giving her 2 bottles at night just to try and get her to sleep in her cot. Last night we settled her for bed, fed, changed her at 10pm. White noise on, no other noise, lights off/dimmed. DD fell asleep at 3am! She was awake/crying every single time we put her in her cot. She only slept after I breastfed her then gave her a second bottle, she's not used to bottles so only took 2 ounces. She slept til 5, I fed her then she woke again at 6.

I am on my knees here, I'm so tired I can barely think straight. I've been sobbing since 6am because I can't do this anymore! I just want to walk out and book into the nearest hotel and sleep!

I think I have postnatal depression as I'm having horrible thoughts and feelings.

I saw HV again today and DD has gained 4 ounces in a week, she's basically stayed on the centile line. HV has said she's gonna refer me to perinatal team for counselling and I should see my GP re: possibly antidepressants (I've had depression before) she's also advised that because of how low I am my milk supply might be affected and if I wanted to stop breastfeeding and switch to bottles I should. All I wanted was advice on how to help DD sleep but she was so concerned at the state I was in that all she could say was how I should try and sleep and could I leave DD with someone before I have a break down.

Please, can anyone help me? I'm so low and exhausted and I can't even think straight. I love my children so much and hate feeling like this

I'm not thinking this is temporary or permanent, I'm not even thinking how long this might last for, I'm just taking each day (and sometimes just each hour) as it comes. And doing whatever we can to get through and get some sleep.

I'm on the sofa in the lounge in the early hours with DD so DP can sleep in the bed. He has DD in the lounge whilst I sleep in the bed the first part of the night. We don't have a spare room or nursery

Keep on going .
Do what suits you .
It will get easier

Do what works for you, there is no rule book!

There is no right or wrong way

If it works for you and you're managing to get a bit of sleep then that's fine

And tomorrow is Saturday

You're doing great by the way - it's so hard! Ours settled in a sleepyhead (best investment ever) and we also bought a miracle blanket (which is a fancy swaddle) and it was!!!

With reflux try raising the head end of her changing mat (the sleepyhead already does this to a degree) as that will help.

Our paediatrician took us off gaviscon and suggested sma staydown or enfamil ar (which we couldn't find anywhere). Could be worth looking at. Don't forget infacol will take a few days to do its job.

Don't beat yourself up over the breastfeeding - you did an awesome job getting to this stage and she will have benefitted hugely from it.

In a few weeks things should turn a corner and get better. It won't last forever (although it will feel like it right now).

Remember you are doing an amazing job x

I'm so glad things are improving for you. Don't worry about what other people think, just go with what's right for you. You are doing a brilliant job. Take care xx