Help me make a rod for my own back

[29redshoes]

DD is 11 weeks old and, unless we're having a very good day and the stars are perfectly aligned, will only nap in a moving car or in the sling (with me walking - marching on the spot doesn't cut it, she can tell the difference).

I'm exhausted and fed up of this. There must be a better way!

I keep reading about people who make rods for their own back by rocking the baby to sleep. So I don't want to sound stupid but..how exactly do you do this? Because if I cradle DD and rock her side to side, nothing happens. Am i doing it wrong?

And some babies will apparently only nap on their parents/in a bed with their parents? How exactly? If I out DD on my chest, either on the sofa or in bed, she rarely falls asleep during the day.

Also feeding to sleep. Can this be done with a bottle, or is it breastfeeding only?

Any other tips and tricks for ways to get a baby to sleep? I no longer care about sleep associations, I'd just like to find a way to get her to nap indoors! Please be very specific - as you can tell I'm a clueless first timer!

Mine is five months and her favourite way is to sleep on my chest. She puts her head slightly to one side but is otherwise almost face down on her front. I find that if she has all her naps in a day for a few days I can get her to sleep on her back, I use a white noise app also. I'm wondering if you can keep at it with the sling and maybe walk in circles, get her a good nap in then slowly lie down with her still in the sling? Not flat but have pillows ready and see how long she sleeps still attached. Mine feeds to sleep but I'm breast feeding so I don't know about bottles. She feeds differently when she's planning a nap.

Things that worked/work with my DS2 are..

Bf him to sleep on my lap and letting him stay there. I always make sure I have water, a snack, my phone and the tv controller before I sit down and just relax for a bit. I'm sure this would work with ff too...

Bf him to sleep at night by feeding lying down next to him then not moving him.

Bouncy chair. Kept bouncing it with my foot. Again I would get comfy on settee and just bounce him.

Pushchair. Push it back and forth inside till DS2 falls asleep.

Car seat. When DS2 was smaller DP could swing him till he fell asleep.

Garden swing. Sit him on my lap and swing and sing till he drops off. Usually do this if he's fighting the feeding to sleep.

DS2 is a real chunky monkey but I could rock him to sleep by holding him upright and rocking back and forth on the settee. The cradle hold never worked.

Basically I do whatever works. I don't believe in making a rod for your own back. Do whatever works for you and your baby and when it stops working do something else. It's only a probben if you're not happy.

The theory is that if they're held lots as newborn they become more independent later so you are doing that in the sling so she will probably be fine when she's older. I joke to mine that I won't have her sleeping on my chest when she hits 30

I hold mine upright on my shoulder, head into my neck, and walk up and down with exaggerates steps. Or if I'm watching TV shift my weight from side to side but come down heavily on my heels. The little bumps seem to do it.

What worked for me:

BD (before dummy):

Hold screaming (not hungry) baby
Rock / bounce / wiggle / shhhhhhhhhh for fifteen minutes
Put baby down
Baby wakes, screaming
Repeat process until baby sleep

If hungry:
Put boob in baby's mouth
Feed for 40 minutes
Baby falls asleep
So do it

AD (after dummy, also having switched from breast to bottle at six months):
Feed bottle
Put dummy in
Put in cot
Baby sleeps. AMEN.

Seriously, I feel for you. It's a shit time. But it will get better.

Not sure where that 'so do it' sentence came from?! Ignore that.

Have you got an exercise/yoga ball? Wearing my DD in the sling and bouncing up and down on the ball tricked her into thinking I was walking so at least I could sit for a while rather than walk for miles every day!

Yoga ball tricks my baby into thinking I am walking too!

Some great ideas! Thank you. I'm going to be trying them out tomorrow. Think I've finally worked out what I've been going wrong with the rocking

Do naps get easier at three months or do I have to wait until six months?

My son would only go to sleep on boob or on me for months. Sling was a godsend, as was a sleepyhead (he wouldn't go to sleep in it but I could put him down in it while he was sleeping without him jolting awake!). You have my sympathy but it does get easier. Ds is now 12.5 months and sleeps 11 hours a night plus two naps of 1.25/1.5 hours.

DS2 went through a phase of really fighting every nap. He's 11 months now and has 10 hours a night plus 2 daytime naps. We don't have set times, it really depends what we're doing in the day. If I'm home I feed him to sleep, if I'm not there DP pushes him back and forth in the pushchair. He falls asleep pretty quickly.