Send help!! 7mo killing me softly.

[Firstmum24]

My DD has always been a great sleeper and I have put that down to good naps through the day and a bedtime routine from about 2mo. Bath, massage/cuddle, swaddle, bottle and bed. I would put her down awake and within a minute she would turn her head and self settle to sleep, I didn't have to be in the room or anything but I would watch hidden from the doorway a complete angel.

Now.. She is getting too strong for her swaddle and ends up with arms out - which I don't mind at all as I realise she has to outgrow the swaddle especially in this hot weather! But she has started arching her back and turning into her side and stretching her neck right out as if she is trying to look at the top of the crib. Her legs come up into the air. She eventually rolls into her front. She just starts playing. It is wearing me down, every nap/bed time I dread and my anxiety must be rubbing off on her.
She rarely cries but will whine and pine until I go back in and re swaddle her. She will not fall asleep in my arms because she is too excited for cuddles. Same with co-sleeping. She can fall asleep in her pram or car seat unswaddled so I know she can do it.
I have tried a variety of napping times/lengths and nothing seems to work - she is either perfectly rested/overtired/over rested but nothing changes how hard it I s to get her down now.
I really wish I had weaned her off the swaddle so much sooner. Does anyone have any advice?

Just leave her. She may grizzle a bit, obviously don't let it escalate to full blown distress but you have to let her find her own way of self settling. 7 months seems quite old for a swaddle - it's not deemed safe once they can roll.

You could switch to a light sleeping bag - still gives some feeling of being tucked in, but less restrictive than a swaddle.

Otherwise I agree just let her do her thing. Unless she's distressed no need to be actively involved in her going to sleep. If she's spending some time awake but fairly relaxed in her cot that's actually good, it helps reinforce that it's a happy place which sets you up well for getting through the separation anxiety phase later.

Yeah I know - that's why I have been trying to wean her off of it.bim a FTM and it sounds stupid but I didn't realise I was to stop swaddling when she got a bit older and now it's past the point of being able to do it easily. I was just so happy she was sleeping well and self soothing for the last six months that I didn't wanton change anything to my detriment it seems

I still sort of swaddle my 9 month old, I just do it very loosely so he can feel the blanket on his arms, but is free to move. Would that work?

You are probably more attached to the swaddle than she is, because it was the thing that worked when she was little. Don't worry, other things will work just as well at different ages!