Sleepless of Mumsnet - join us if your LO consistently laughs in the face of sleep!

[Purpleboa]

Hi everyone. I thought I'd create this thread when I saw that there were quite a few of us lingering on the 4 month regression thread, with babies that clearly didn't get the memo about things getting better!

I've seen another thread for parents whose children are long term poor sleepers but I think it's been relegated to zombie status. So I hope nobody minds if I start another one! If your LO consistently struggles to sleep, whether it's down to diet, night terrors or just sheer bloody mindedness, please pull up an armchair and join in! I'll supply the espressos, hugs and chocolate, wine and tears served after 4pm.

I'll start: my DD is 25 weeks. She's gorgeous, adorable and the absolute light of my life. Unless it's between the hours of 7pm and 7am! She's struggled with sleep always. I thought things would improve following the 'fourth trimester' but she got a cold, reacted badly to her jabs...and before I knew it we'd cruised into the 4 month regression. Which she's either still in, or she's teething, or developing, or wonder weeking, or fck knows really!

The past two weeks have been particularly painful and I feel I'm reaching the limits of my endurance. I love being her mum, I love spending time with her...but not sleeping makes it oh so very hard.

I have found Mumsnet to be a wonderful source of support during those dark and lonely hours when you feel like you're the only person in the world going through this. So I wanted to give back and support others too.

I'll put the kettle on...

Hello tea
Well after the vomiting settled she went in her cot about 9.30 until 11.30 when I just coslept..no idea how much she fed as I was exhausted but I did find her sleeping on the edge of the bed at one point

Yes to losing weight but in such a way that my clothes fall off me as I have no shape and I look 10 years older.

All things considered I've decided night weaning is a must. And if it has to involve some crying so be it. Even if it doesn't cure her waking at least that will be about 4 less breastfeeds being drained from me so I can retain those calories! And for those of you considering it, right now I wish I had done it around 7/8 months. I did it then with ds and he adapted really quickly. Not all babies are the same though and I didn't think dd was as ready as he was.

I hope you all get some rest today. I have already eaten a bounty and ripple. Not my fault the shop had them on 2 for £1

Oh good god just read tea's post before mine about night weaning. Is there no hope??

Hi buga yeah i wish we'd night weaned a bit earlier too, ds is my first and just didn't have a clue! He took a while but at least because of that we do occasionally have a good night as he doesn't need to feed....cd do with some more of those!!!! [smiley face]

I had a bag of caramel nibbles for breakfast, may explain the weight gain! Tho think its my face that has suffered most, i look 10 years older than i am and can actually pinpoint wrinkles that have appeared this year!!!

Just wondering how do you all find naps? My ds has always been terrible at night but used to be great in the day, cd count on at least one 1hr nap in his cot, made the nights more bearable knowing i'd get a coffee at some point, recently (since 9 1/2 months) he is so hard to put down, took me 45 mins this morning for a measly half hour!!!!

Hhhmmm just read ur other post buga sorry....nights did improve after weaning but tbh theyre now split between great nights (sometimes 6 hours!) and then AWFUL nights (up for 3 hours, no amount of resettling helps)...my lo is teething again too, joy.

Bugaboom, you are incredibly well behaved. Had I gone in that shop I would of spent at least £5 and would have nothing to show for it.

Naps are equally as awful as night sleep here, ds wakes up as soon as I put him down, it takes about 5 attempts and he will wake up tired still, he fights naps and can fight them for hours, which is why he usually ends up going to bed so early. He's just fallen asleep, so I am hoping I can get another later nap in today, or at least he wont be so tired before bed.

And yes to the loosing weight and no shape thing! My bum has literally vanished like I'm as flat as an ironing board, and no time to exercise either. My clothes all hang off me and are usually covered in baby food/sick/vomit, I have huge bags under my eyes and thin hair (pp hairloss) so all round I'm pretty attractive looking right now.

To those of you who have successfully night weaned, please please let us know how.

We had big problems settling our first to sleep but she just went to bottles really well and nothing like the boob monster baby that I have now! So I don't have a clue how to start it. I am planning to have DH back in bed with us over Xmas and see if he can start settling her and offer water - should this be cup or bottle for those who do that? She sips in a messy way out of a cup.

I think I need to do something as I had an embarrassing meltdown in the street today when I couldn't get the car seat in or car out as I was blocked in. I swore loads and then burst into tears. The workman responsible for this just came and knocked on the door to check I felt better after I had got out for a few hours. He must have been genuinely worried . I am just so tired, something like that can really set me off balance.

Tea does he wake less frequently now you have night weaned?

Lil have you tried different teats for bottles, the different shaped ones?

Ds is tired, this is the nap I can never get in am trying to get him to sleep now, he's fighting it

It's not that she won't take a bottle, it's that I've been BFing as it's easier. And I think now we're in a need the boob to go back to sleep cycle....
Am also trying to get a nap in. Really don't want to go out walking in the dark and the rain again!!

Hope you manage it lil, I'm really struggling. Have been trying for a while now. It looked promising at first, he just closed his eyes. It soon turned into talking/laughing/waving/squealing. It's fast approaching the point where he will start screaming.

I don't understand it. He was tired but just does not want to go to sleep at all, he will fight and fight until he gets way past tired.

Zombie Do you have a nap schedule? At that age my DS was napping at 9.30am for 60 - 90 minutes and 2pm for 40 - 60 minutes, this was regardless as to when he woke in the morning. Bedtime at 7pm.

No nap schedule as he's always been all over the place with naps. He also won't sleep anywhere apart from home, sometimes he will fall asleep in the car.

It also makes things difficult as I'm a carer for a family member, we have to go there daily and often get calls at random times to say they need help so it would be quite difficult to start a routine

Going to attempt to put him in bed in a min, he's asleep for now

Fingers very tightly crossed everyone has a good night

lili I think I'd try water in a bottle - she may get some comfort from the suck.
zombie did he nap eventually? We always struggle with routine as having to fit around ds social life too!

Mine will only nap at home but when we went on holiday he napped in the car. Soon your LO will only need one nap a day which hopefully will make it easier!

I think we may try tackling some of the night wakings with a bottle of water in the holidays. I'm going to try to see over the next few days if I can be a bit more aware of which awakenings she is seeming to really take a good feed and which she is just using me as a dummy (if there is any pattern!!)

Managed to settle her for the last afternoon nap eventually with a dummy - finally!! There was quite a lot of crying but it was raining and I have a toddler who won't tolerate the rain cover on the buggy, so our usual late afternoon walk didn't happen. I can tell you all the top ten Christmas decoration households in our neighbourhood Will have to think of other things for DD1 to spot after Christmas.

Haven't been on for a while. I think things have improved a little but she's consistently waking at 10, 12, 2 and 4 and then up at 6. Each time she's up she has very long and 'deep' feeds like she really needs it regardless of how much I feed during the day. At 6 months is this normal? How on earth do I try and reduce these feeds? I've been feeding hourly during the day but no change!

She won't take a bottle so water isn't an option.

So we're trying something different tonight! DH is sleeping in the baby's room. He will only wake me for feeds. No idea how it will go, given that she's feeding about four times a night atm. The hope is that he'll be able to settle her, because she won't be able to get the goods from him. We shall see...both in bed now so fingers crossed! Good luck all...

Bugaboom he didn't nap he stayed up until 6.20 though which is a good time for him as he usually is ready for bed by 5.30/6.

Purple hope your plan works!

Fluff, I don't know what to suggest, ds still drank a whole lot of milk at 6 months and dietitian told me I had to reduce it asap as he wasn't interested in food, I reduced the bottles by 1oz a time to start with then would offer water instead, ds won't take water in the night but I think once he realised he wasn't being offered the milk he gave in and stopped the night feeds.

Purple - that sounds good! Let us know if it works. I had a lovely 15 min doze early this morning knowing DH had the baby and toddler was still sleeping. Sad that I'm happy about 15 min good quality sleep really.

I weaned my eldest off night feeds at 6 months by giving him sips of water from a bottle.

Oh good luck purple, I imagine it might be a rough night but it sounds like a great plan, might take a few nights to notice a difference though so don't be disheartened.

Good luck purple!

Think I'll try holding her and not feeding her for a few mins rather than offering a feed straight away. Hopefully she'll stop needing the feed then??

HAha lili called mine a boob monster too!

Tbh we didnt really night wean, he did it himself after we did some cc, know i'm on here moaning coz the last 3ish weeks have been HARD but when i think back a bit it was a lot worse before. My lo was feeding at 7, 10, 1, 3 and 6 EVERY night (wasn't even too fussed about that) then at 6 months ish he began waking in between those times too, 15/20/30 mins after putting him back down. He was super hard to settle without a boob too, dh convinced me we needed to do cc at around 7 months.

We basically stopped feeding him to sleep by rearranging bedtime a bit at a time, started by leaving his grobag off until after his feed then putting a story in then a song etc until he was pretty much awake going down. He did cry and it was really hard but after a week he dropped the 10 o'clock feed then within a few weeks we were down to only one early morning feed somewhere between 3-6. I think what happened was he went a few days without waking at a certain time so then next time he did we cd be fairly certain he wasn't hungry so tried settling him other ways and surprisingly enough it worked!

Now he gets a bottle at 7 then another early morning but don't give him any more unless we're really desperate!! Actually he won't take it now, tried giving him a bottle at 1 the other night and he spat it out and continued with the screaming/crawling fun!

fluff ur lo sounds like mine, he was eating 3 good meals and having 4 feeds in the day and still up overnight loads, also wouldn't take a bottle, we actually gave him a cup first, he liked his cup so started putting expressed milk in it.

Good luck purple

zombie we're on crap naps here too, sucks coz he then ends up really overtired and bedtime takes forever to settle. Think it gets hard too as they get bigger, really gets my back and shoulders rocking him so long.

Good luck tonight everyone and if its shit just remember tomorrow theres and to get us through! X

So far, so stressful! DD slept till 11, DH brought her through for a feed...then tried to resettle her and she cried and cried and cried! Now feeding her again and will try and get her down. Feeling incredibly anxious and like I've created a monster through breastfeeding her :( Figuring I might as well just take over...