Anyone on for another 4 month sleep regression hand-holding thread?!

[uppereastsidemom]

DD2 is 16 weeks and had been doing 7pm - woken up at 11.30ish for a feed - 5 or 6am. Happy days.

She is now waking up anytime between 7 and 10pm, going back down but reliably waking up for 2-3 hours between 3 and 6am. It is torture. I know this is a predictable phase that will pass, but christ it is miserable.

Waiting to see what tonight brings . I know there had been an active thread that seems to have died - hopefully meaning that all those babies are now sleeping beautifully

Friend of mine who's just seen a pic of my DD in her Halloween outfit on Facebook has just messaged me saying it makes her feel broody. I laughed very loudly at that. Just goes to show that social media does not tell the whole story!

Thank GOD im not the only one dealing with this! My health visitor made it out like by 4vmonths my lo should be sleeping through on his own in his cot with no comforting. Mine also only sleeps in the pram after alot of shuggling. Grr

Purpleboa im exactly the same. I was on day 4 of 0 hours of sleep yesterday, i had to get dh to drop off ds at grannys this morning on way to work so i could sleep as i felt so ill with lack of sleep

... the thing that gets me thru purple is knowing that even in a few months they will be totally different babies. They change SO much and even though they might not sleep thru any time soon, they start napping better, sleeping more soundly at night etc. It DOES just happen. And in the meantime there is mumsnet and gin!

Xx

Thanks Starfish. You're right I know. It's just DD's sleep has been so consistently bad! If she'd been a good sleeper at some point I could at least have taken heart in that. But she never has been and she's just getting worse!

Awful night. Again. Wide awake at 130 and it's now 3 and why the hell won't she just go the fuck to sleep!! I'm feeling so angry with her. What can I do here?? I feel so helpless!

And now she's crying and won't stop! DH has taken her which I feel so bad about as he was awake at 3am yesterday too. But I'm scared about what I might do if she stays with me :( I feel like the world's worst mum. I should never have had a child.

Purple it does sound like you're having a particularly bad time with sleeping. My older ds slept very well and was generally very content, when ds2 came and slept badly at night, couldn't nap in the day, was sick constantly and generally unsettled, it's been a huge shock. There were a couple of nights in the early weeks when I just handed him to dh after being awake for hours, and I actually I couldn't stand the baby and told dh to take him before I did something stupid.

Do you think that she could have silent reflux? We realised that ds was very uncomfortable from reflux and it seemed to cause him to suddenly wake crying from a seemingly deep sleep.

Of course I'd never harm a hair on his beautiful head but sleep deprivation is torture.

I've taken all the easy options, he's ff, he has a dummy and I co sleep with him. He often wakes hourly but I can usually get away with the dummy or bringing him into bed.

As hard as it is now the day will come when you'll be sitting on a park bench drinking coffee after a FULL nights sleep, watching your lo play, there are so many amazing times to come.

Thank you so much pyjama! Sorry to keep whingeing on, just felt desperate. I guess some nights are better than others, it's just hard to see that. I know it will end but it's hard to keep sight of that at 4am!

I have considered the reflux thing. Tbf, she's not waking and crying, but she is pulling her legs up quite a bit and farting. Usually doesn't seem in physical distress though?

DH gave her to me for a feed at 630 and she was wide awake, so took her downstairs for a play on her jumperoo. My reward was many cute giggles, it isn't all bad :)

She sounds adorable. It's difficult to know sometimes what's wrong and sometimes by the time you've figured it out they're ok again. Ds often just gets so

I'm taking ds to baby massage next week and hoping it will help him relax.

It's comforting to know I'm not the only one up several times a night, in rl everyone seems to have baby's who sleep well.

I'm waiting for you all to say your babies are sleeping through to give me some hope.

It's such a hard thing to go through purple - sorry it's been another crap night. Don't feel guilty for giving her to DH - remember you are a team and you are shouldering most of the responsibility so of course you need a break and he does sound very lovely from the things you have said about him on here before.
I know what you mean about crap sleep. DS did a few 4/5/6 hrs stints up until 8 weeks and now 11 weeks later we are lucky to get 3 hrs at a time. In fact it's more like 1.5-2.
On the subject of wind this is also a contributing factor to our wake ups... DS is in so much pain with trapped wind that it disturbs his sleep. Finally during the days he let's it all out and my god it's a lot. The gp told me to cut out dairy (he was also being sick a lot and not gaining weight) to see if he has a cows milk allergy. Might be something to look into if you are considering reflux. I thought allergies were more skin and rash based but they can also have gastrointestinal symptoms (and are usually more of an intolerance than a true allergy). In any case why don't you give your little girl some probiotics to help her tummy? Google biogaia - you can get them from amazon.
I guess I'm so caught up in working out what's causing my boy so much pain and discomfort from feeding that the sleep thing is just something that blurs into the general 'oh this is shit' feeling I have a lot of the time!
But yes the smiles and giggles and interactions melt your heart and as they get older and don't need so many naps those moments lenghten and so the good begins to outweigh the shit!
X

Well I've forced mine out for daytime walks to get sunlight and she hasn't had another 'playtime' but has been feeding quite a lot in the night. Last night she had 4-5 feeds (can't quite remember) but this was definitely due to DH being home yesterday and a distraction when feeding so will have to try to rectify that today. One good thing is that I got her to sleep a few times in her moses basket - this has NEVER happened before so I'm hoping if she learns that ability then it could help her settle between sleep cycles over night?

Purple - I too was thinking CMPA. My daughter has it and the first 8 weeks were HELL on earth. Constant crying, bad sleep it was awful. We had a few glimpses of her happy little self but we spent the entire time questioning what the hell we'd done. I went off dairy and she became a completely different child.

Thanks starfish and fluffikins. I too was thinking it might be allergy related but the symptoms don't really fit. She gets a bit windy but doesn't seem in pain or distress - and she doesn't really cry that much. She just seems to be stuck in a pattern of light sleeping and feeding! Last night was a bit better so am hoping the trend will continue tonight.
I need a good night's sleep as I'm feeling wiped. Had a shock today when a huge dog in the park ran up to my baby girl and got the hood of her jacket in his jaws. Took a good few attempts to get it to let go. Thank god I had a firm hold on her. Can't stop thinking about what might have been. Been in tears on and off tonight. Normally I'd be less of a wuss but I feel like I'm running on empty right now so it's hardly surprising. Terrifying to think how vulnerable our little ones are :( dreading tonight as I don't have the capacity to cope and DD is unsettled too, probably because of me. She's already woke once crying.

Good luck everyone!

oh that is terrifying! Glad everyone is ok.

I've found a slight improvement with turning the night light off and leaving white noise on for a while longer. Tempted to leave the noise on all night but DH isn't keen.

Purple I'm really thinking of you. I've had so many days where I've felt utterly broken and like I'm trapped in my life and everything had a nightmarish quality. But then I get to catch up on some sleep somehow and I feel so much better, so much more capable, and I realise the nightmare is the sleep deprivation, not my life.

Can you get your OH to take your daughter one morning, just for a walk between feeds so you can catch a nap for three hours or something?

I think, I think, I hope, dare, dream, that we might be coming through it. Each night is different from the one before so I'm under no illusion that the road ahead is clear, but the night feedings are starting to space out again.

Good luck everyone x

Fluffikins I leave the white noise on all night but not sure if it's doing that much good. She's still waking!

Sploink fingers crossed it is getting better and you can graduate from this thread! Hope i don't see you at the 9 month one

Well, things seem to be improving a bit here. She's at least dropped the 1am wake up. So nights look like:
8pm to 1130: sleep, wake to feed
12am to 230: sleep, wake to feed
230 to 445am: sleep, feed
Then wide awake! Or if I'm lucky, an hour or so more of sleep. We weren't lucky this morning!

At least she's not doing hourly wakings. I would love her to drop the 2am feed. I have considered not feeding her but she seems to need it as she feeds very hungrily. Hoping it'll go away naturally.

Thoughts? Do we think this is looking encouraging?

That's great the hrly wakings have passed !

This was my night last night...
730 - bed
930 - awake due to trapped wind. Put on boob despite knowing he's not hungry.
1030 - back to sleep
0045 - awake - boob for an hr (I might have fallen asleep sat up too!)
245 - awake... bring into bed so I can remain horizontal and provide access to boob
430 - stirs... clearly not going back to deep sleep so I rock him.
5am - can't be bothered anymore so put him in his cot and sneak to the loo so DH has to get up (!)
6am - after an hr of ssshing patting he finally goes back to sleep
630 - morning time!!

Feel like I have no control over the night situation at all!

Hey Starfish. What a night :( hope tonight is better for you...

Well, I jinxed things by saying about no more hourly wakings! Rule number 1: NEVER boast that hour baby's sleep might be improving. Past two nights she's woken at 11.30 for her feed.. and stayed awake. Didn't settle till 2 last night and tonight....well here we are at 3.

She keeps drawing her legs up and writhing around so I'm guessing it is trapped wind. I'm therefore coming to the unwelcome conclusion that it's something I am eating that's affecting her. For the past few days her poos have been very runny and she did a green poo yesterday. Plus she's been sick quite a while after feeds.

I hadn't wanted to go there as let's be honest, we've already sacrificed so much for our babies and changing my diet just seemed a step too far! But I'm being forced to accept that if I want any sleep, this must happen. And of course I want to help her.

Problem is I'm vegetarian so the majority of my diet is dairy based. It's going to be a huge struggle. I've also been losing weight fast - enough to freak me out, I've never been able to lose weight easily - so I'm concerned how this will affect it. Still, I'll give it a go for two weeks and see. Not about me and my needs anymore is it??

I could cry. I am crying as I type this! What did we do to deserve this? Surely the bad sleep karma should be more fairly distributed?!

Oh purple... huge hugs. It's totally shit isn't it?! I don't know what to say other than I know how you are feeling...is there anything else that could go wrong.
All of this is totally pants now but one day it WILL be fixed.
I've been dairy free for 5 weeks now and still don't know conclusively if he has cmpa. Be aware you can drive yourself totally mental over this so don't become obsessed (like I have!)

Sleep still shit btw!

Hey Starfish. Sorry that sleep is not improving for you either.
Well I lasted a day of being dairy free. Then I had a chocolate muffin out of desperation :) never been very good at any kind of diet! I'm not really convinced that DD does have an intolerance. Think she's affected if I have too much chocolate but seems ok otherwise. Hard to know, as you say! We have two weekends away so going to see how it's going after that. I take my hat off to you for managing 5 weeks! Amazing!

Well it sounds like WW3 outside! DD seems unaffected though, fingers crossed she'll pass out for the next few hours,and once she wakes, the worst will be over...

Ds was going to bed quite well following a bath and feed routine. Now he's rolling over though he keeps rolling over in his cot and getting stuck and frustrated.

It's so cute though, he needs to learn to roll back though.

When are you all going to wean? Ds will be 6 months by Christmas, I can't believe where the times gone. My baby is growing up way too fast. If only we could get a bit more sleep I would keep him like this forever.

I'm living off dairy free chocolate and Mr kipling fruit pies purple

I know pyjama. .. goes so quickly! I'm going to wait at least a month (he's 20 weeks tomorrow) as I want to heal his tummy before introducing food. I waited till 6 months with DS1 and did BLW... will be different this time now my monkey can't have dairy. Sigh. Why does everything have to be so difficult!!

Ah the Mr Kipling fruit pies have saved me here too. Are you on the CMPA Facebook group? That's invaluable for lists of dairy free things.

We've had mixed success here - we've had some daytime naps where she's self settled, which has never happened before, and we had one good night where she only woke once after I realised she'd been reverse cycling with feeds and corrected it. But then she had a horrible night last night screaming and only wanting to be on my chest and really screaming if I moved her at all. I only got an hour and feel shattered. Fireworks not helping either. We've got no support either in terms of grandparents nearby and finding it hard going having no break for nearly 5 months of 24/7 care for her. Must power on though.

Hi all. How's everyone's nights? Bad night here, just when I really needed it to be a good night too. Tomorrow (well, today) we drive down to visit DH's family. They're a big brood and there's always some kind of drama kicking off with them. Plus the drive is about 5 hours. I need some rest to deal with it! But DD has been waking hourly (after a better night last night). Whhhhhhy????? She just woke me from a nice dream and I'm so fucking fed up!

I'm thinking of moving her to her own room soon and trying some form of sleep training. Because we can't go on like this.

Re. weaning, not sure. Probably at 6 months - tbh, I don't have the energy to think/care much about it right now. It's enough of a daily struggle trying to get DD to take a bottle...

Ditto with no support fluffikins! And I am so fed up of the bloody fireworks - still going off here last night until 10pm! Pretty sure they were responsible for her waking at 9.

Well, my 13 week old used to be a great sleeper but suddenly the last two nights she's been up constantly. And this after she's been a great night sleeper, down for 12 hours with one 20 minute feed around 5 or 6 am (I'm BFing).

Now she keeps crying when I put her down, keeps waking up and won't settle. And because she's awake and feeding more, she's filling her nappy which she needs changed (she's teething too do her bum is sore) which just wakes her up completely. I'm so tired! My husband is asleep beside me here and I'm so envious it borders on resentment.