Anyone on for another 4 month sleep regression hand-holding thread?!

[uppereastsidemom]

DD2 is 16 weeks and had been doing 7pm - woken up at 11.30ish for a feed - 5 or 6am. Happy days.

She is now waking up anytime between 7 and 10pm, going back down but reliably waking up for 2-3 hours between 3 and 6am. It is torture. I know this is a predictable phase that will pass, but christ it is miserable.

Waiting to see what tonight brings . I know there had been an active thread that seems to have died - hopefully meaning that all those babies are now sleeping beautifully

Naps are the absolute bane of my life. He is definite a high sleep needs baby, so if we have a crap nap then I have to try and insert other compensatory naps, to try and him up to about 4 hrs over the course of the day.

He can now do about an hour and a half awake time, a bit mor if we're out and about and doing something, but he does start to get overstimulated and super grumpy so I spend a lot of time trying to bring him down, songs, cuddles, reading to him etc. Lots of sitting in a dark room, yawn.

If we've hit the crap nap supervein he can have seven or eight naps in a day, which means hours of the dark room, hours of bedtime rituals, hours of hovering over the cot like a ghoulish sandman figure.

Last night sucked incidentally. Up at 10, 2, 4 and then up for the day at 5.30. We're already on our lunchtime nap and it's not even 10am.

Is anyone else's baby still on old time?

Last night he woke up for a feed at 12 instead of 1, and was up for the day at 5 instead of 6. This was despite putting him to bed at his usual time.

Ghoulish sandman - made me giggle sploink ! I hear you. Most of its are done in the sling whilst trying to stop my toddler waking him up.

Am struggling with the clock change only because there's an extra bloody hour to fill which feels like 4 years! DS is so inconsistent that we aren't really on old time or new time... just on trying to make it thru the day /night time!

Oops his not it!!

Sploink you may be tired but your sense of humour is excellent! Love the 'ghoulish sandman' comment!

Yeah DD is def on an earlier schedule. We are putting her to bed earlier...With the result that she thought 330am was wake up time today. Ouch. Just going with her cues and hoping it passes soon...

Anyone know if this is supposed to 'end' at some point, or can we just hold out hope for incremental improvements?

Today we've hit the crap nap supervein . It took me over an hour to get him down for the last one and he just woke up after 25 minutes :weep:

It just ended with my DS1. Was amazing. He just found his thumb and slept thru when we put him in his own room at 19 weeks. Literally from waking 6 times a night comfort sucking to sleeping 12 hrs. Don't think I realised at the time how lucky I was...!

God knows sploink. I'm worried, like Starfish said earlier, that it has ended and I'm just stuck with a crap sleeper! It's a bit easier when you have something to blame it on. On second waking at 2am. She is doing 3 hour blocks which I guess isn't so bad, but I want her to do more! I know she's capable of it. And she's much harder to settle at this hour.

Fed. Up!

Urgh DD2 seems to like 2am! And despite both boobs was screaming the house down. Third feed in 90 minutes. I. Will. Not. Co. Sleep! I just won't get any sleep that way. But the rest of the house will

At 530 I eventually give in on some nights and put her next to me. Hate doing it but it's out of desperation! Ugh. Today will be bought to you by Nescafe and Cadbury...

4.35am she went back down after feeding for 2.5 hours. Then awake at 7. Although DD1 woke at 7.15 with a nose bleed so I wouldn't have got a lie in anyway!!

We were up for the day at 530am with DS1, DS2 managed till 6am with 3 wake ups.

Is anyone else TOTALLY BORED of this now...?!

Jealous of the coffee and chocolate purple - i get to have mint tea and fruit

I spend so much time doubting myself, wondering if I'm creating or at least exacerbating our situation. He's 22 weeks today and waking up between 2 and 5 times per night.

I have convinced myself that he's a touchy baby with high sleep needs so I dedicate myself during the day to making him nap. But yesterday we had our worst day ever: 4 naps of half hour, so less than half the 4 plus hours that I aim for. And last night we had our best night in ages: slept half 6pm til 1.40am, another feed at 5 and then up at 6.45. So am I making him sleep too much???? Would he sleep better at night if I just left him the hell alone during the day? If that's the case, does that mean I can actually go out?????

I wish I knew what to do.

It's all trial and error sploink... why don't you try a few days of minimal daytime sleep and see what the nights bring. If that doesn't work revert back to more daytime sleep?

Oh ffs. That's us up again at this hour. I am utterly fucking fed up. Why the hell have others managed to crack the code of baby sleep and I can't??? What is wrong with my baby??

I no longer know or care if it's the regression, the clocks or whatever. I do everything I can to encourage her to sleep but I feel like I'm failing. I love her so much but at this point I'm wishing I never had a child. This is relentless and soul destroying. I feel so angry and in despair!

Purple

It totally, totally, totally sucks. I wish I could say something vaguely comforting. I had my worst day ever yesterday, in terms of naps and cranky wired baby, but somehow because the day before had been dreadful and so I pretty much knew it was going to be dreadful, that took the pressure off and I stopped worrying about it so much. So there's my comforting words for you: stop worrying. Absolute bullshit, really sorry .

Anyway, wishing you all easier days and better nights. It's nice to chat about it with the similarly suffering

starfish it definitely feels more error than trial here . But yeah, last night was pretty similar, so I'm thinking that's the way to go. Which suggests that I have the slightest control over anything that happens in my household, which is hilarious

What am I supposed to be doing?

DD was up at 11, 1, 2 and 4 last night. During the day I let her nap but can only really get her down when she's strung out and ready for a nap, so she screams a bit, I feed her and she falls asleep on me, it can last between 20 mins or 2 hrs depending on whether the sodding postman comes or if the cat makes a noise etc etc.

I can put her down to sleep at night ok and she tends to sleep between 7.30 and 11 no problem.

hv says I need to get her to self settle as I hold her to sleep in the evenings after doping her up into a milk coma. But she's never self settled and screams if I'm not feeding/holding her. when she wakes in the night I try to stroke/hold her before offering boob but she ends up screaming unless she's fed.

I feel like I'm just completely useless and I'm doing it all wrong :(

for all of you in despair. My ds has come through the sleep regression now after a gruelling few weeks. I just want to let you know that it gets better. You're going to get through it. You're doing the very best for your baby. It's so hard but you can do it. Rest when you can and do what you know is right for your baby. Best of luck to you all and wishing you well ((unmumsnetty hugs))

Thank you ReRegRhonda. Good to see there might be an end to it!

Very quick message but please don't think you're doing anything wrong Fluffikins. Of course you're not although I certainly felt like that at 3am today! The sleep 'experts' and HV and Internet sources can make us feel such utter failures and it shouldn't be the case! We are doing what is best for our babies. For the record, even when I do get DD to achieve the mythical 'drowsy but awake' state she still wakes up several times!

Do what gets you through. As you'll have seen from this and other threads, what works one day with your baby won't necessarily work the next day. Best thing is to just go with it best you can!

You're doing an amazing job

I don't think anyone's doing anything wrong. I've had a great sleeper and now a rubbish sleeper.

A bedtime routine does seem to work, ds can't self settle, leaving him doesn't work he just gets hysterical, most mornings we'd be up for the day at 4.30 if we didn't bring him into bed with us. Some days what works doesn't work other days.

The only thing I can be sure of is that it does get better, we will all get a full nights sleep and even a lie in, I know because I have a 7 year old and it only seems 5 minutes ago that he was a baby himself.

Thanks ReReg. Although I don't think it 8s going to get better - I don't think the regression makes a difference really, my DD is am appalling sleeper and I think she always will be Even more wakings tonight. What did I do to deserve this??,

Mine was up from 3-5.30 wanting to play today. I have to get up at 6 so have had no sleep as she was also up at 11, 1 and 2 for feeds. I don't mind the feeds as much, but the playing/cooing/generally not wanting to sleep is a complete pain in the arse! Any solutions?

Haven't a clue Fluffikins! I despair in those small hours when she won't sleep, I'm too exhausted to keep up the rocking and she won't feed. It's awful. Absolute hell. Just when you think it can't get any worse, it gets worse.

I'm at the end of my tether trying to deal with a screaming overtired baby who won't nap. I am dying for her to go down so I can sleep too but no joy. Resorted to putting her in the sling. So tired I feel sick. How the fuck are we meant to cope like this?? Can anyone give me any words of reassurance?