Daytime nap misery

[LurkingQuietly]

Ok, will try to keep this brief! My 18 month DS has one nap a day. He needs one nap a day, preferably of 2-3 hours (when he does this, the day is an utter dream!), but it is an absolute nightmare, and I need help/suggestions please!

Up until a month ago, we did this;

Bedtime - let him fall asleep on us with the TV on (I know, I know). This was fine for ages, and then started taking longer and longer and before we knew it, we were at 10pm bedtimes and later. Argh.

Daytime - no set plan, let him sleep when he wanted. Generally took himself off to sleep on me or the sofa. I transferred him to his cot. Fine.

We decided to try sleep training and gave CIO a go (no judgements, please) for bedtime. It worked like a dream for us. Within 3 nights he was asleep inside 2 minutes, at 7.30. No issues. Now goes down quite easily every single night.

However, since then, daytime naps have become a huge issue. He will fight it for hours, if he sleeps at all. Even when he's asleep, I can carry him upstairs, still asleep but he wakes the second I lower him carefully into his cot. I'm lucky if he falls asleep, and stays asleep on the sofa.

He will religiously fall asleep in the car, but wake the second the car stops. Won't fall asleep in his buggy, regardless of how tired he is.

The days he doesn't nap are horrific, and I am 6 months pregnant. I need him to nap!!

What on earth can I do/try?

Thanks!

Nap every other day - he may be working down to dropping it (sorry!), if he's going down at 7 instead of 10 he may not need it.

Having said that DTs went through a horrendous nap refusal at the same sort of age - I had to put them in the car and go for a loooooooong drive to make the rest of the day bearable.

Thanks for the reply...although the thought of dropping a nap makes me want to cry!! I am positive he needs a nap still but I will try the every other day trick and see how that goes. Thanks.

I have actually started hating people who have children who nap easily!

Do you have a similar routine at nap time as you do at bedtime? In his room in his cot? If he's used to falling asleep at bedtime like this now then he'll probably want it at nap time too.
You might have to do CC for a couple of days at nap time as well.

That's a really obvious thought I've just not had!! So if bedtime routine is bath, pj's and sleeping bag, bottle, story, bed...I wonder if I do story, bed (and expect to have tears etc for a few days) if that will work. I will give it a go. Thank you!

Yeah sounds good. We have the same bedtime routine as you, and at nap we just do sleeping bag and bottle (oh and dummy) and he goes down the same as he does in the evening. Good luck!

Thanks. I'm reluctant to reintroduce daytime bottles (I'm desperate to get rid of the nighttime one to be honest!) so will substitute with his beaker of water and see how we go. Thank you!

Good advice from the other posters.
I think if you are desperate for him to sleep, I 'd let him have a nap on the sofa, and not move him. If he doesn't sleep, then it's quiet time, at the same time every day, watching something low-key on TV with you. Maybe in his sleeping bag. You might find that easier to manage when the new baby arrives, rather than you being up and down the stairs.

Totally up to you. I personally love that he has a bottle before sleeps- it's a really easy way to get him drowsy and a nice excuse for a five minute cuddle before I put him in his bed. What don't you like about it?

Reintroducing a bottle in the day feels like a bit of a step backwards for us as he has only had a beaker of milk in the morning and a bottle at night with 3 meals a day for about the last 10 months! Once food was introduced, he was very quick to drop the bottles in the day, completely without any encouragement from me - I offered them for a long while afterwards and got fed up of throwing milk away!

I'd rather drop the night time bottle due to tooth decay etc, brushing his teeth after his bottle doesn't work, and it seems pointless brushing his teeth and then giving him a bottle. I'd rather he had it from a beaker earlier on, before bath time maybe and then had his teeth brushed. We're a way off that though!

Re sleeping on the sofa, it's not ideal, but I will have to go with it if a bit of sleep training doesn't solve the daytime issue.

I see your logic.

I think sleep training should do the trick with naps. If it worked well with nights then I don't see why not. All the best.

An update: Not that I think anyone who commented on this thread is waiting on tenterhooks for me to reply (but thank you wholeheartedly for everyone's advice!), more for anyone who searches and finds this because they're in a similar situation.

So, we tried a bit of sleep training. A pared down bedtime routine (story, and musical lights when I put him down). We went for Controlled Crying again and he has been going down with no grumbles from 3 days - and sleeping for 2-3 hours. We are a whole new household! It's made a huge difference to us all, and I'm so pleased we did it.

I know CC isn't for everyone and it took a lot to push us to try it, but I am thrilled we did.

If you're in a similar situation - there is hope!!!