Ds seems intent on breaking me, help!

[Donthackmenow]

Ds is 2 and an early waker. It was 5am, is frequently becoming 4am and today was 3.15 . I am currently lay in the spare bed in his room, in the dark listening to Ewan the bloody sheep for the 4th time whilst he shouts and sings.
Any suggestions? I will try reintroducing the gro clock but it didn't work last month. I don't want him to wake dd so tend to respond fairly quickly. She wasn't a great sleeper but started to turn a corner at about 2.5 so fingers crossed! I can't afford a sleep consultant but I am so frigging tired. Dh works all hours so can't really rely on him to help especially seeing as his solution is normally to put Peppa on the iPad and go back to sleep!!

Hiya donthack. My ds was a chronic early waker when he was younger so I know exactly how you are feeling.

For us, it was either caused by overtiredness or needing a change in routine eg starting to get ready to drop the nap or nap needed pushing later.

Our DS was waking early, but then also taking an early nap (as he was tired from getting up early) but this just perpetuated the problem. He was also getting to a stage where he didnt really need to nap every day anymore.

We solved it by slowly pushing his nap & bedtime later. At 2 he needed to nap at around 1/1.30 for 2-2.5hrs & then bedtime needed to be 8pm. This got us back on track with a 7am wakeup. We then started having occasional no nap days & on those days did a super early bedtime of 6pm & he would sleep all the way through til his usual 7am, often later.

Does your ds still nap & if so at what time/how long for? What time does he go to bed at night?

I certainly wouldn't provide any stimulation at night time. Nighttime is for sleeping, not for Ewan the sheep or Peppa Pig.
You need to make sure DS is tired enough to need to sleep all night. Lots of fresh air and exercise during the day, and as few daytime naps as necessary.
When hi wakes in the night go in and tell him its time to sleep. Tuck him in, but no cuddles and conversation and leave the room. Keep doing this until he gets the idea. It maybe several times s night at first, but won't take long until he gets the idea. You need to ride out the storm.
Its unlikely he'd wake other kids in my experience.

Thanks for answering! At nursery he currently sleeps at 11.30 for an hour and a half. In an ideal world they would like him to stay awake for lunch but he takes himself of and falls asleep! At home he falls asleep once we have to go somewhere in the car or pushchair. I asked them to stop limiting his sleep in case he was overtired but he always wakes within the hour and a half. Tomorrow his birthday (will be actually 2) so I may try and keep him up and put him to bed super early. Ewan the sheep is white noise not a toy so in theory should help...
It is really starting to impact on life, I am considering cancelling NYE plans as we are meant to be staying at someone's house but I think it will be too stressful. I will wait for the inlaws to leave tomorrow and then I will start being consistent with leaving the room and hope he won't wake his sister. Hopefully it will be a case of short term pain for long term gain!

I had a feeling you might say he naps before lunch - its classic early waking.

First thing I would try is to slowly stretch him out with that naptime. Start 10-15mins later & after about 3-5 days (depending how he copes) push it another 10-15mins later. You need that nap to start absolutely no earlier than 12.30 but ideally more like 1pm.

It will take a couple of weeks to get there & I appreciate its difficult with nursery but perhaps you can explain the situation & ask them to work with you to sort it out by keeping him up 15mins later at a time as you are doing at home. If he won't nap at home then I would time your outing for the time you want him to nap so you are still sticking to pushing it later & avoiding him nodding off too early.

I would try this first before trying no nap days. In order for him to cope with no nap he needs to get up at a decent time or he will be an overtired mess.

As for the early starts, as pp says try not to engage too much with him - keep it to reminding him that night time is for sleeping & leave it at that if possible. You could also try a gro clock if you think he would understand it.

Re NYE plans I understand why you might want to cancel, but perhaps a night out will do you good. And you never know, he might just surprise you & sleep in!

Good luck. And repeat the motto 'this too shall pass'....