Never been a good sleeper - help needed

[Mummy1604]

I am looking for some help on getting my baby to sleep for longer than a couple of hours. She wakes up around 6-8 times a night. So stretches of sleep can be 3 hours but mainly it's every 2 or 1. She is ebf (refuses a bottle) and is 5 months. She has never slept well and I can only remember getting 4 hours of sleep once! We have a bedtime routine of bath and feed (sometimes a book if she isn't hungry) starting at 18.30. She is then in bed by 19.30.

She does nap in the day but only on me, in her bouncer it in the pram.

I have read the no cry sleep solution and tried to stop the falling asleep when nursing but that didn't help. She is sleeping in a cot in our room, also tried a sleepyhead but that didn't help either. She seems to wake and feed for comfort for most of the night awakenings. Some people have suggested a dummy but I am just not sure how this will help. Also giving formula is another suggestion but I am reluctant to do this. Any help would be greatly appreciated.

A dummy might help, because you say she's feeding for comfort. It's the sucking that's comforting, and a dummy can replicate that. The idea being that, when the baby stirs, rather than getting up and providing a boob and then going back to sleep, you just roll over, shove the dummy back in, and keep dreaming. It's well-meant advice, though whether it would work for you is anyone's guess - she could refuse a dummy entirely, she could keep dropping it and crying for its return every ten bloody seconds (like mine did for a while). Worth a try, because you never know, it could be that, with something to suck, she'd sink out for six hours straight. Or she could keep waking every two hours for the next year. Or anything in between.

I'd imagine switching to bottles of formula won't improve her sleep much, but it would mean you could sink out elsewhere and catch up on some kip while someone else deals with a feed or two.

Time's your main thing though. Time will help. You won't notice it for ages, and then suddenly you'll realise, you're getting regular four hour stretches, then six, then one morning the baby alarm fail to go off, you'll oversleep, wake in a panic assuming disaster, but no, she'll just have slept through. It will happen, I promise. Good luck staying sane in the meantime.

All I can tell you is about my experience & maybe some things that I found helpful may work for you. My 6 month breast-fed dd would wake every 2-3 hours & would not go to sleep until I breastfed her (she doesnt take a bottle) She did this since she was 2 months old & I was adamant that she was doing this because she was hungry as she would feed really well each time.

Well last Saturday we decided it was time she went in her own room. I gave her a feed after she woke after 3 hours but 2 hours later I suddenly decided to not go in & see what happens. She cried for about 5 minutes then fell asleep for another 20 minutes then she cried again so I went in, put her dummy in & left her. She cried for another 5 minutes & I went in, put her dummy in & she cried, then slept for another 5 hours!! I was so shocked she could do that. The next night she woke up twice & fell asleep as soon as the dummy was put in & the next night she just woke up once! 6 days on & she sometimes wakes up once for her dummy but it means my husband can do it!!!

Im completely shocked my dd can go 12 hours without a feed. I wish I had put her in her own room sooner. Also her naps have improved- from 30 minutes to an hour. It's true that sleep breeds sleep!

So based on my own experience I would say- putting dd into her own room, controlled crying & using a dummy has allowed her to sleep through. I think people have suggested a dummy as the sucking motion is very comforting for babies. But if you don't want to do any of the things that have been suggested (like controlled crying) don't do them.

Also with the naps my dd would only sleep in her swing or pushchair but a few days before she went in her own cot at night I would put her in it for her naps & would let her cry it out- it sounds harsh but for me it worked as she now solely sleeps in her cot. I was getting worried as she was getting far too big for her swing seat! Good luck xx