10month old dd wont fall asleep

[jofeb04]

Hiya,
Need some advice.
My dd (10months) will not fall asleep in her cot in the night, we've tried everything. We've tried routines before bed, bath and bottle etc, but she just wont go off.
She falls asleep downstairs now, still with a lot of hard work though.
TBH, my ds (now 2), never went through this sort of stage, so I need all the help I can have.

Neither of my kids sleep very well. I can remember reading to my dd1 for 2/3h hours trying to get her to sleep. The best advice I got was do whatever it takes to get yourself through. If that means thye fall asleep downstairs or in my bed then so be it. They go to sleep well now. Some kids just don't need a lot of sleep.

I think thats part of the problem tbd.
Dd sleeps really well once shes gone off, easily ten hours or more!

I do empathise. My 11month old despite clear bedtime routines takes a long time to settle. He is very active, doesn't eat too well. If he has any nap after 2pm we can wave goodbye to any evening. If there has been too much day time sleep ie on a nursery day i always put him down later as he is just not ready to sleep
Views on leaving to cry are strong however we felt despearte.
We now do bedtime, cot and settle for 3mins. Leave for 3mins,( BIG PROTEST first night). Return stay for 3 mins just minimal settling leave for 6 mins, return if not settled, settle for 3 mins. Increase this to 9 then 12 if you can. The max we reach 12 mins as that is the longest we can do. I do not believe in leaving for huge periods and listen to style of cry. First few nights were really angry cries as soon as we returned to the room got beautiful smiles. First night hardest but by night three we saw big improvements asleep in 6 mins. Whatever works for you. Down side is my little one wakes in the night and we have not cracked this. Best of luck. Oh finally after bath we don't go downstairs at all and do all dressing,feeding, reading in bedroom with a nice lavendar oil burner.