Putting a 4 month old down for naps

[ananikifo]

My baby is 20 weeks and will not nap. We notice that he gets very irritable, cries for no reason, rubs his eyes, and seems tired in the mid-morning and afternoon. He will not nap in a cot. He will only fall asleep after a good feed, and if I try to move him to transfer him to his bed he wakes instantly and cries. I've tried putting him down, picking up when crying and putting down when settled but that can last for at least an hour until I give up. He will sleep at night but for some reason the day is different.

We bf on demand and relatively frequently (1-2 hourly in the day and 3 hourly at night) and aren't looking for a strict routine, just a way of getting him in his bed during the day, when he needs a nap.

What techniques have worked for other people?

Sorry, I can't give any good advice but have exactly the same issue. LO sleeps well at night in a crib at the side of our bed but will just not sleep during the day.

He does sometimes fall asleep in his sling but wakes as soon as I stop moving so either have to walk around for a couple of hours or he just gets a short catnap. Often he will go all day without a nap and even though he is grizzly by bed time he never has a full meltdown. He seems fairly happy still so the lack of sleep doesn't seem to bother him but I worry he should be having more.

He also feeds frequently which means I spend ages trying to get him to have a nap but he eventually gets hungry again before he gets tired.

Hopefully somebody more experienced will be along soon.

When are you trying first nap? At that age it needs to be 90 mins after waking - the golden rule! If he doesn't nap early enough, overtiredness will mess with his ability to sleep, he'll be too frazzled to nod off.

My dd sleeps in her pram downstairs during the day

She has done since she outgrew the Moses basket and she is now 11 months old

It lies completely flat and is quite spacious

We're really hit and miss. Sometimes, I manage to time it well and he snoozes after a few minutes of shouting. Other tunes, we need a quick walk in the pram, or the snooze happens in a sling. I try to not let him go longer than two hours, and he'll often appear tired after 90mins.

I'm having trouble getting him to sleep for longer than half an hour. I know it's about sleep cycles, but unless we go for a loooong walk it doesn't happen.

DS was exactly as you've described and I found the Baby Whisperer's (ironically named) "EASY" routine worked well for us because it's very flexible and I also didn't want a strict routine. I used her shush-pat technique to get him off to sleep in his cot. It took a LOT of dedication and patience to begin with as I'd gave to sit by his cot patting his back for up to 45minsvto begin with, but after a week or two we were down to 5-10mins, and it was worth it because, once asleep, I'd then get an hour or so of blessed peace and quiet.

I got the books out of the library, but if you're buying I'd get the Baby Whisperer Solves all your Problems, as i found it much more practical than the original book and covers pretty much everything in the first book anyway.

Good luck! I hope you find something that works for you.

We get DS to sleep in the pram too.

Regarding length of nap - he also sleeps for just half an hour most of the time, but he will sleep longer (up to 2h) of ? put him to sleep soon after he's fed. Obviously you can't make them sleep too soon if they are not tired yet, but he would often get tired earlier if his previous nap was short IYSWIM.

anani I feel your pain. My 20 week old will only sleep after a good feed. This makes daytime napping very hard as I have a 3 yo DS too who won't sit on the sofa for an hour three times a day so that DS2 can nap! He absolutely will not be put in his cot. Have tried white noise, pupd, leaving him for a minute then returning - nothing, he just screams until it's feed time again.
I'm waiting for weaning and figure that when gets had a big meal and doesn't bf quite so frequently, we'll be able to work something out. I am really trying to be laid back about it until then.

Have you read the No Cry Sleep Solution / No Cry Nap Solution? It's slow and steady, and is aimed at bfers and more gentle parents. We didn't find it was a silver bullet, but it did help somewhat with DS's very tricky nights. That and time, although waiting it out feels very frustrating at the time!

Or if you have one like ours who never quite manages naps well, the sling can be a lifesaver as at least you can have your hands free.