Is 9:30pm an acceptable bedtime for a 4 month old?

[Loubyloulou88]

Just wondering, as ds goes to bed at 9:30pm but I've since read that a baby of his age should be going to bed between 6&7pm. Does anyone else put their little one down at a later time??

Who says the other time??!

Whatever works for you. If you wake the baby at 7am, then they need to go to bed earlier, but if you let them stay in bed 11-12hrs (excluding feeds) then who cares?

I used to put my DD to bed around this time when she was 4mo because my DH didn't get in until late & I wanted to eat with him & have his help. As she got older, it got a bit earlier. Now DS actually wants to go to bed earlier than this, but then perhaps that's because he's used to DD's bedtime? (He's 6mo.)

IMO there are no hard & fast rules. If that time works for you, that's all that matters. It's not like baby has to be up for work/school in the morning...

If it's acceptable to you then it's an acceptable bedtime.

Thank you both. I've read it online on one of those baby sleep websites and it says baby should be getting 12 hours sleep at least. Ds woke pretty much every hour last night (he's got a stinking cold and I'm partially blaming the 4 month regression!) and he wants to be up at around 6:30am every day so it concerns me that he's not getting enough zzz's. Plus he's a terrible day napper so doesn't always catch up. But glad to hear I'm not alone in choosing a later bedtime. It so difficult knowing what's best for him.

Does he seem tired again 30mins after waking? If so, it could be a 'false start', & he wasn't ready to wake up properly.

Also, does he fall asleep feeding? That can affect them getting into a proper deep sleep.

Generally though, 4mths is, as you say, sleep regression time. Both my dc both slept through again at 19wks, particularly DS, who STTN at 10wks for 5 nights then not again until 19!!! I try to go with the flow - they change so quickly at this age, what works one week might not the next. My big recommendation is to get a bedtime routine going, so whatever time baby goes to bed, they know its bedtime iyswim.

Oh and, trust your instincts!! :)

Mine hangs around with us til we go to bed. Having said that, she's usually asleep on one of us by 8ish.

By 4 months, DD was in bed for 7, although I woke her at 11 for her dream feed still. Only dropped that at about 20 weeks.

TBH, I would say its what suits you. I know plenty of ppl whose babies don't go down til say 9pm and then sleep til 9pm.

BUT I would rather we had our evening to ourselves even if that means getting up at 7am.

Don't you want a breather after 7pm?!

I did try him at 7:30pm for the last couple of nights, and even though he settled himself to sleep which was great, he started waking before 12am which he had never done before. His sleep is so pants at the minute, but I don't know how much of it is down to his cold and how much is sleep regression or the earlier bedtime. A few weeks ago he was sleeping from 9:30pm and waking once at 3:30/4am then up at about 7:00am. Now it's all gone out the window .

Ds's daddy doesn't get home until about 6:30pm so if we continued an early bedtime it would cut short the time they have together.

And yes chicken, he does usually fall asleep on the boob, but that's not really seemed to cause a problem to us so far. When he woke last night I managed to send him back to sleep a couple of times with shush/patting.

if you don't want to bring bedtime forwards, could you extend his morning sleep? (you might need blackout blinds and to keep the house fairly quiet till 9am). it does sound like quite a short night for him especially if he doesn't nap much in the day. could he be overtired and that's why he doesn't nap well?

I agree with you there, and I have read that the better rested they are in the day, the better they sleep at night. He's been an awful napper, but this morning he managed a 2 hour nap which Is great for him!! Will see what tonight brings. Have gone back to 9:30pm bedtime so will see what happens. Thank you all for your help x