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Original poster

Preparing to get tough with 2yo. Any advice?

22 replies

orderinformation · 07/04/2013 23:26

Dd takes ages to go to sleep. About to instigate new regime of two stories and a song then light off and sleep without us sitting in room until she falls asleep. Any advice please? Am gearing up for a dreadful week and will have to do it alone while dh takes ds out of house in buggy so he can sleep without being woken up if dd tantrums.

OP posts:
frazzledbutcalm · 08/04/2013 09:45

Be consistent, don't give in. It will take less than a week if done correctly. You may have a horrendous few days but will be worth it in the long run. Good luck Smile

browniebear · 08/04/2013 10:11

I've been at this for a week now with ds. Apart from night 2 when he slept from 8pm till 5:45, every other night he's woken and cried every couple of hours. I've had to lay in his bed till he goes back off as my next door neighbour starts banging on the wall! Hmm It's not going well and I'm very sleep deprived. I'm watching for tips too because this is awful.
Sorry for the hijack.
It's nice to know your not alone though
I hope it works for you and you get more sleep than I'm getting

omama · 08/04/2013 20:09

Op is she still napping every day? If so how long for & at what time? And when is her bedtime?

A lot of folks seem to have issues at this age, esp if they are still napping. she may not be tired enough, hence why taking so long.

Some people opt to cap the nap & wake them after say 1hr & bedtime goes much smoother. we found our ds was a horrendous grump all avo if we did that, & he still took ages to fall asleep (overtired) so we accepted that while he continues to nap, bedtime needs to be later. Since age 2 he has gradually started having more & more days without a nap & that has helped. Now at 2.8 he naps approx 2-3 times a week. He goes down at 8pm if he naps (straight to sleep) & 6.30-7pm if he doesnt.

ommmward · 09/04/2013 09:56

Why do you need to make her sleep alone at 2? It seems really young to me.

Me, I'd be sitting in the room with a little torch, reading my book, or listening to an audio book on headphones while she drops off. Or meditating. Or something. But, personally, I wouldn't be going cold turkey.

frazzledbutcalm · 09/04/2013 10:22

We all have different opinions... I think sleeping alone at 2 is normal. Hey ho, we're all different, that's what makes the world go around Smile

Original poster
orderinformation · 09/04/2013 12:47

Ommmward - so I can use that hour and a half to put son to bed and cool dinner and do laundry and catch up on admin and do a bit of housework and spend some time with dh. Otherwise I have about 90 mins after she's gone to bed to do all this before I go to bed.

OP posts:
rowtunda · 09/04/2013 13:20

Ommmward - are you seriously suggesting OP just sits in the same room and meditates whilst waiting for a two year old to sleep? Ha I really have heard it all now!!

frazzledbutcalm · 09/04/2013 14:16

order i agree fully with you. Mine have all had bedtimes since being small. It makes a huge difference to your night! The ability to sleep alone, no matter what age, is normal and something we all should be able to do. Mine all did this from being babies, there's no reason why children can't be taught/helped to sleep. How's the routine going? x

Original poster
orderinformation · 09/04/2013 14:46

Not started yet. Gearing up to it...

OP posts:
sleepcrisis · 10/04/2013 20:04

Hi, Just wondering orderinformation, how are you planning to get tough? I am in exactly same predicament - DS 22 months goes hysterical if we leave room. We sit in the dark for up to 45 mins. He spends the entire 45 mins checking I'm still there - 'mama?' - 'shhh, mummy's here'.

I need a plan of action - do you have one?!

Original poster
orderinformation · 10/04/2013 20:16

I do but not sure when to start it or if it will work.

Plan is we sit dd down and explain what we will do.

Which is: Teeth. Potty. Nappy. PJs. Cuddles. Milk. Two stories. Lights out.

We will couch it in terms of now you're a big girl etc

Then dh will take 4mo ds out so I can not worry about waking him up.

And I will implement it being firm even if crying and coming back to reassure her every few mins if needed until asleep.

Could this possibly work?

OP posts:
stargirl1701 · 10/04/2013 20:18

Could you do little pictures of each step and put them up? As each step is completed, she 'posts' the picture in a box. A visual cue can often help.

ImpyChica · 10/04/2013 20:37

Oh blimey... with you on this one. DD (2.8) was a fab sleeper until 2 weeks ago when we had the amazing idea of taking the side off her cot... It's been a nightmare ever since - we've tried baby gate (didn't fit brilliantly on her door frame), threats, promises, pleading, meditation/story CDs in her room, the works. Am tempted to put side back on cot even though I know it goes against all advice. She screams the place down if trapped in her room, poor DS (6) has had enough too! We're at our wit's end!!! Will be keenly checking this thread for wisdom and to see how everyone else is doing.

frazzledbutcalm · 10/04/2013 22:15

It will work if you be consistent. Don't waiver or give in to your plan! Once dc realise that there's no extra attention, no backing down, they'll soon settle. When you go in to reassure, don't make eye contact and no talking. I'd just ruffle hair, maybe shh, shh, shh .... but that's it. Good luck all Smile

Original poster
orderinformation · 10/04/2013 22:26

Thing is there always seems a reason not to start eg no point starting tomorrow as she's staying at gp sat night. No point next week as we go on holiday in three weeks and will break routine etc

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Original poster
orderinformation · 10/04/2013 22:27

Impychica - can you put a bed rail on the cot so it's like a side but not. You can get portable ones that attach under the mattress.

OP posts:
frazzledbutcalm · 11/04/2013 00:50

I'd just start anyway. You'll probably find that she'll be used to the routine at home and it will just spill over (work) elsewhere.

MyShoofly · 11/04/2013 00:57

Well ommm sitting in our 2 year olds room is what we are currently doing and it is not all its cut out to be that is for sure. The only thing I meditate on is how annoying this has become and how very little time to myself I am getting.

Do come back and let us know how it goes OP.

browniebear · 11/04/2013 07:03

Rapid return and no eye contact/talking seems to be working for us. When ds wakes through the night now (anywhere between 2 & 5 times) I go in, sit on the bed but say nothing till he drops of again then sneak out.

How are you getting on OP?

ImpyChica · 11/04/2013 08:54

Thanks all - yes OrderInfo - might be a good idea to get a side rail. I ended up crying in frustration at 10pm last night, I get so stressed knowing she needs her sleep as is refusing to settle. Sitting in with her doesn't work, even with my back turned to away from her.

How are you getting on Orderinfo? Did you get tough last night? And BrownieBear? Any improvement. I know it will get better eventually but seems like she's worse every night at the mo....

Good luck all! xx

Original poster
orderinformation · 11/04/2013 14:49

Not started yet. She's staying with go on sat so may start sun.

OP posts:
Original poster
orderinformation · 11/04/2013 14:50

Gp not go. As in grandparents

OP posts:
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