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Original poster

How do you get your one year old to sleep?

27 replies

NothingsLeft · 01/04/2013 22:36

Just curious as I've been 'sleep training' since November with no real progress. I'm officially bored of shhing and not gradually treating. DS still wakes up 3-6 times a night. We have tired everything, including millpond who were rubbish.

Im wondering what other do as I need a new plan...there has to be more to life than lying on the floor for hours in end not sleeping...

OP posts:
Original poster
NothingsLeft · 01/04/2013 22:44

Sorry for typos Blush

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Original poster
NothingsLeft · 02/04/2013 12:13

Bump...can't face too many more nights on the floor.

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teacher123 · 02/04/2013 13:13

What technique are you using? And what is he waking up for? Does he eat plenty during the day etc? DS is 11mo and he sucks his thumb, which makes my life a lot easier!

teacher123 · 02/04/2013 13:15

Sorry-my last sentence came out really smug and I didn't mean it to at all! I find that DS sleeps best if he's had good naps in the day, plenty of food and milk and fresh air. Does he have any allergies or anything? Big sympathy, broken sleep is horrific.

MummyNoName · 02/04/2013 13:27

With all of mine they've been given their dinner, a bath, bedtime cbeebies for 15 mins with a little snack like tea cakes. Warm milk then taken upstairs. Put on gro bag. Close blinds and curtains. Nice hugs and kisses. Then Lay them down with their comforter and walked out of room.

Bedtime is like Groundhog Day but they all self settle. They have all woke in the night for an oz or two of milk feom 12 months until about 15 months when they naturally stopped wanting it and sleeping through.

Dh goes in and settles them if they are not settling or messing about or if they wake in the night. The dc mess about if I go in (I'm too soft) but they don't mess for my dh. He lays them down, says night night , gives a kiss and walks out. Only on the first couple if nights did the dc play up.

Make sure baby's warm enough, had enough food and not hungry before bed, and plenty of stimulation, and running about during the day. Fresh air is key ime. They eat and sleep much better if they've had a good run out, whatever the weather.

Obviously growth spurts, illness a d teething disrupts sleep and that effects everyone.

feekerry · 02/04/2013 13:39

i feel your pain. my dd is 1 and she still gets up every 3 hours. i am watching this with interest

pickledlily · 02/04/2013 16:40

DD wakes at least twice. She won't self settle, she just jumps around the cot and/or screams and would do so quite happily for hours.

So she gets cuddled to sleep and put in cot when she's sleepy enough not to wake when she hits the mattress. Takes me 30-60 mins depending on the time of night/her mood, but it takes DH less than 10 mins. Envy We don't do anything different, she just wants to be latched on to me and and I won't let her!

Would love her to not wake, but not convinced sleep training would fix it. She's not a naturally placid baby, she hates missing out on stuff and is also suffering separation anxiety at the moment from starting nursery.

So you are not alone!

mum1979100 · 02/04/2013 16:45

My ds has had virus and teething recently so I have put any sleep training on hold. He's 12 months. I rock him to sleep and feed/ cosleep as required. No idea when I will manage to break the habit. I tried some gradual retreat a while ago but wasn't getting anywhere. After a few nights he still cried for ages so I gave up and fed/rocked him to sleep. Glad I didn't persevere with it cos with these viruses we would have been back to square 1 anyway.

forevergreek · 02/04/2013 17:09

A long wind down and gradually quieter seems to work

So for 7.30pm bedtime I would do:
5.30/6 - dinner ( finished by 6.30 latest ideally)
6.30 - upstairs, bath ( upstairs after dinner with no more active play)
6.50- milk, then teeth
7pm- a couple of quiet stories/ song
7.20pm bed- tuck in, leave room, sit on floor outside room with door ajar if they won't settle completely alone

Flisspaps · 02/04/2013 17:13

DS is 11mo.

After weeks of lying on his floor, holding his hand, shush patting, bottom tapping, singing, gradual
withdrawal, CC (returning every few minutes)...we've done what we did with DD and now leave him to it. We've done our usual bedtime routine, put him in the cot, given him a cheery kiss goodnight and gone downstairs. He was asleep within about 15 minutes (DD took 90 minutes the first night, after 2 hours if being rocked, shushed, sung to and nearly put out for the dustmen) and has gone straight through both nights. If he were to get hysterical I'd go in but so far he's shouted for a while then lain down and gone to sleep.

I know CIO isn't for everyone, but we tried everything else with both of them and it's the only thing that made a difference. DD was 14mo when we did it, I wouldn't do it with a baby younger than DS.

DuttyWine · 02/04/2013 17:19

Will watch with interest. I let ds fall asleep downstairs cuddling me or do then carry him up to his cot where he sleep through all night. I know I should get him to go to sleep by himself but I don't want him to be sad and as he sleeps all night I'm scared to jinx it!

Original poster
NothingsLeft · 02/04/2013 19:56

Dutty That sounds like a lovely way to drop off. I am very envious of those that have something that works well.

We are doing gradual withdrawal but have been doing it forever. As soon as we make progress (ie out the door), teething, illness or whatever hit and its back to being by the cot again for hours. Regardless of how much we withdraw, he still wakes lots. I am so bored of it. There must be a better way.

DS is a chilled out little dude by day. By night he screams his head off, totally hysterical, snot all over his face, sobbing. I've tried leaving him to cry but he just doesn't stop. He will cry for 3-4 hours then get that double breathing thing that makes me feel like shit.

I've tried cuddling to almost asleep but he then started waking every 45mins Shock I've thought about bringing him back in our room or co-sleeping, so at least we are all in a bed.

He eats well and I take him out everyday. He's been night weaned for a couple of months now. He has CMPI & soya allergies, so I know they the cause on occasion. He is also a teething machine and has 10 teeth. I calpol. He still wakes 3-6 times on average. We lay on various parts of the floor and shh him ????

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DuttyWine · 02/04/2013 20:34

It is lovely but I know at some point he will have to go to bed in his bed and I am dreading going through what it sounds like you are now. Ds starting sleeping better at 1 when my mum bought him a duvet, he sleeps on top of it rather than under it and I think he feels more snuggled and secure, would that be worth a try, I know it won't get him to go to sleep but might stop him waking so much?

Original poster
NothingsLeft · 02/04/2013 22:06

I will give the duvet a try (I'll give anything a try tbh).

Currently lying on the floor for the third time tonight. DS is screaming Hmm

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forevergreek · 02/04/2013 22:14

Another thing to try is getting him liking his bed/cot in the day ( peek a boo/ reading/ putting bunny to bed)

Original poster
NothingsLeft · 02/04/2013 22:31

He loves the cot in the day and will happily play in there. We do peek a boo and play pass things through the bars.

What is put the bunny to bed?

Might try that one with my new duvet Smile

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feekerry · 03/04/2013 19:58

another one here who puts a duvet or big fleecy blanket on top of cot mattress.
it seems to help dd quite a bit not sure why. maybe nice and snuggly....

Original poster
NothingsLeft · 03/04/2013 20:24

Stupid question but do you still put a grow bag on?

An hour and a half of screaming tonight. So sick of this. I wish I had of those babies that stopped crying after 20 mins. Breaks my heart Hmm

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daisydee43 · 03/04/2013 20:28

Some good tips, my dd 1 still wakes up 3-4 times a night but is unwell atm

feekerry · 03/04/2013 20:53

my dd still wakes 3-4 times a night but is perfectly well lol!!!
i do stilll use a grow bag and try get a really big one so plenty of room. sometimes wonder if they are too restrictive tho...

Fern123 · 03/04/2013 21:11

Watching this with interest too! I posted about my 15mth old DD a few weeks ago but got no replies Hmm (mumble mumble vipers mumble...)
She hasn't slept through since I went back to work 5 mths ago and seems to be getting worse instead of better.
She is walked/rocked to sleep after bath, milk, teeth, story, and song and drops off quite quickly but wakes around 10.30/11.30 and won't go back to sleep for hours unless we bring her into our bed, which is fine if she drops off quickly but some nights she seems v agitated and restless and no one gets a good night sleep anyway!
It's so difficult to stay positive, and I'm a lot less patient with my 3yr old after a crappy nights sleep so please tell me there's something that can be done!
Ordered the No Cry Sleep Solution last night at 1am in desperation but don't know if I can face gradual withdrawal!

Original poster
NothingsLeft · 04/04/2013 01:14

Don't do gradual withdrawal!!! You will end up lying in the floor for months on end if my experience is anything to go by. At least you are not sleeping in a bed at the moment.

You're right it hard to stay positive. We have tried pretty much everything. We even went with millpond in desperation (at £300 a go) but they haven't added anything useful.

I'm lying in the floor again for the second time tonight. DS has been awake for 45 mins. Thank good for the onesie...

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Fern123 · 04/04/2013 01:22

Just listening to wailing at the moment as DH tries to get her to lie down in her cot, DD is not cooperating, I just want to in and get her now Hmm.
She's already been in our bed for bout an hour but was wriggling and getting more awake so DH took her back into her own bed.
Seems to have settled slightly...no spoke too soon!

Original poster
NothingsLeft · 04/04/2013 01:31

It's terrible isn't it? Still lying in the floor here but the crying has stopped. I'm now to scared to move in case it starts again! I don't know how I got into this ridiculous situation. Was your 3yr old a good sleeper?

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Fern123 · 04/04/2013 01:46

No unfortunately not, didn't close an eye until he was 5mths and then we cracked, he went into his own room, had a good bedtime routine and we did a bit of the dreaded CC! I was delirious with tiredness and it bloody worked so we were ok with that.
Can't do it so much with DD as she shares with DS and wakes him so all four of us are running about at 3 in the morning!
All gone quiet here too, just the odd noise, think she's talking to DH, I should go in and offer to take over but I'm afraid I'll start her up again.
Hope you get out soon, do you have other kids?

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