Always tired

[Mum2boy]

Does anyone else seem to feel constantly tired, no matter how much sleep you get? I'm starting to wonder if it's chronic fatigue syndrome or something... even if I have 8 hours sleep I still feel tired. I've had quite a bit of stress over the last few months and although things have quietened down now, I'm wondering if the tiredness is as a result of the mental/emotional turmoil. I even slept 9 hours one night and still felt tired the next day... although most nights I only get around 7 1/2 hrs. Does this sound familiar to anyone?

Yes. Hugely familiar. No advice though, sorry

I know the feeling mum2boy!
Do you drink enough water every day? And take enough exercise? These can have a pretty big impact on fatigue.

Yep, know that feelingf!
I'm sure part of my problem though is that I go to bed too late. Ds(20mths) goes down at 7pm and usually sleeps through 'til 7, but I love the freedom from him in the evenings and so always stay up far too late.

I feel the sme. No matter how much sleep I get I am exhausted.
When I have stressful times I do get more warn down - so this might explain why you are so tired. Stress can cause all sorts of physical symptoms.
I also have problems getting to sleep (which is why I am typing this at 11.50 at night!)
What does help me though is exercise! Sounds funy - but I always feel more awake when I am out the house doing something - like walking or going to the gym. My problem is getting the motivation!
Hopefully now your turmoil has quietened down you might get some more rest. x

Mum2boy, can I ask how you feel about life in general? What I mean is, do you vaguely dread each day because you are focussing on the demands that will be made on you? I went through a stage of that and felt exhausted all the time. I was desperate every night to get to bed as early as possible. Although it's a lot better now, I still have to make an effort to think about the positive things of the coming day, rather than dwell on all the things I have to do, and how little "me" time I get. Your mention of recent stress did seem significant though, and maybe this is a kind of delayed reaction. If so, take control of whatever you can - eat well and I agree about exercising, and try to plan things that you want to do for yourself. If things don't improve soon then perhaps some medical tests wouold be a good idea?

Thanks for your replies on this, I'm sure it's a fairly common problem but I'm not even a new mother anymore!! I used to feel a lot more 'rested' when ds was younger for some reason, but everything feels a lot more full-on now. Droopydrawers, yes I think there is an element of dreading the lack of time to myself, and I know that lately it's been getting me down that as soon as I get up in the morning, ds (3 1/2) is up and rearing to go - when all I want to do is have a quiet cup of tea and sit down & watch the news. I just never get to do that anymore - dh is away quite regularly and I tend to get almost the full responsibility of ds, which is tiring. I'm also a part-time student but luckily I won't have to start studying again until February.

I also think that stress has been a factor, and now I'm starting to obsess about how much sleep I'm getting (or not getting), and it's probably making things worse. Maybe there's a bit of depression in there somewhere too... I'm actually counting down the days until ds starts school so that each day won't be as 'constant' as it is now. I just hope the tiredness passes so I can feel normal again.

huge amounts of sympathy and empathy! Our ds is 2 and very lively from the minute he wakes up (usually 7am, but 6am today...) until the minute he goes to bed - luckily 7pm. Dp is at home full-time with him, so I know I'm lucky (!) coming to work, but we're both constantly knackered.... We've moved house recently and are expecting another baby, so a fair bit of stress around us aswell - it's so difficult...

Is there anyone - parents/in-laws who can have ds overnight? We haven't done this yet, but are planning to, and just the thought of it is keeping me going! Even one lie-in a month if you can arrange it might make a big difference - mentally and physically.

dp and I have a system where I get up on a Saturday morning with ds and she gets up on a Sunday morning - again, knowing you've got a lie-in once a week might help - sorry - don't know if you have a dp, but if you do, maybe you could arrange something like this?

Hopefully we'll all make it to when they're teenagers and wanting to spend all day in bed??!

I vaguely remember reading a definition of depression years ago that said "alienation from ones self" - or something similar. Having a child whose needs always seem to take precedence to your own I think can leave you feeling not like a whole persons, and therefore depressed. If this is a useful way of looking at it the key to recovery must be to get back in touch with your own needs and act on as many of them as possible. Of course it has to be balanced with meeting your child's needs or else you will probably feel horribly guilty, but finding any way possible to do what matters to you should help. SO, if exercise makes you feel good try to find a gym with a creche; if you want to read the paper / watch the news in the morning while you slowly wake up, then that might be the ideal time for a video. Would it help to make a list of all the things that you'd like to do but currently feel you can't, and then see if you can find solutions to at least half of them? If you have anyone who can take your ds and give you a break, for however short a time, then do it.

I really feel for you and hope that things get better soon

Hi mum2boy
I spoke to my GP about this a while ago and she said that sometimes it can be mind over matter - if you tell yourself that you're not tired and make yourself do things anyway you do feel better. I hope that doesn't sound like I'm trivialising the way you feel. The creche at the gym is a lifesaver for me. I quite often don't do any excercise, but just have an hour with a magazine and a coffee and it's wonderful. Also, I find a catnap in the middle of the day works wonders -even 10 mins with my eyes shut helps. Your ds probably doesn't nap any more but perhaps he can be persuaded to watch TV for 1/2hour so you can put your feet up. Hope you feel better soon.

Mum2boy, I know how you feel. Before my daughter was born I was a zippy person who thrived on 6-7 hours sleep a night and was on the go all day and rarely tired. Now I probably sleep more (unless dd's ill etc.) hours yet feel exhausted constantly and have to drag myself out of bed. I crave her nap times (she's 14 months so still has 2 a day) and feel exhausted at the prospect of her waking up again! I do of course feel dreadful about this as she's a gorgeous little girl and excellent company. I think it's like a lot of people here have said, the lack of 'me' time and the continual responsibility for another person is very tiring. Also I don't know about you but I don't think I sleep as well as I used to. Now I'm always listening for little baby sounds and shufflings from the cot so my ears are on alert all night. I'm a real worry-mom, very over-protective and I think that takes a lot of energy.

Have you been to your Dr's? It might be worth going even if it is just to rule out a physical cause of the tiredness eg aneamia or thyroid problems. Hope you feel better soon.

Have you been to your Dr's? It might be worth going even if it is just to rule out a physical cause of the tiredness eg aneamia or thyroid problems. Hope you feel better soon.