Am I doing something wrong?

[WestYorkshireGirl]

I am a first time Mum and DD is 7m. She's never been a great sleeper as she used to snack a lot when we co-slept (every 2-3 hrs). For the last 6 weeks have been getting her into a cot, but she really doesn't like being in there. I feed her until almost sleepy or just nodded off (so she doesn't get used to feeding to sleep - she's EBF), but when I put her in she always wakes up and then screams so I have to pick her up and soothe her on my shoulder and try again. She wakes between every 1-3 hrs. Sometimes she goes wild with screaming so the only way I can get her back off is to feed her, but I worry that this reinforces the wakings as she doesn't feed for long before nodding off. Last night she woke up and was fed at 11.30, 1.15, 2.30. 4.45 and 5.30 and then I got up with her at 6am as she was not for going back to sleep at all.

Have tried some of the suggestions in the 'No cry sleep solution' but she's having none of it. Weaning going well and she's having 3 meals a day and having a B/f between meals so I can't imagine she's hungry?? I have tried leaving her to cry for a bit, but she becomes absolutely hysterical and won't settle when I pick her up at all - the point of shaking or rigid.

Have tried playing with her lying in the cot and putting her in there during the day for play and that works fine - it's just sleeping in there that seems the problem. People say I should put her in awake, but that doesn't work at all. I have the same issues re daytime naps - she won't have any without a feed even though she's exhausted or a buggy push for about an hour till she nods off. She naps for around 30 mins if she does nod off - am and pm. I have read the quality of sleep is affected by day time naps and vice versa, but I feel stick in a vicious circle and am so tired!

Is this all 'normal' or am I doing something wrong? Any advice appreciated!

I don't suppose she is hungry but she needs the comfort which is no less valid a reason to wake up and cry, sadly

All sounds quite 'normal' - certainly common. The 'No cry sleep solution" has lots of good tips BUT you have to stick to them for a long time for them to work.

Maybe pick one thing and work on that; perhaps going to sleep with less help at night would be a good starting place.

There are some posters on here with much more sleep expertise than I though - hopefully one of them will be along soon.

Hi, this sounds fairly familiar to me. Although with my ds breastfeeding often didn't help and I would rock him to sleep in my arms. I was always against letting him cry and bought all the books looking for a solution. It was a long patient process but he did learn to fall asleep himself eventually. When he was about 4 months we took him for a walk in the evening and he slept for his usual 30 mins. Then exactly 2 hours later, after we'd done bedtime bath etc we put him in the cot and he played and then just nodded off. We couldnt believe it. We just put him in the cot for 5 mins while we were tidying up, we didn't expect him to fall asleep. So this made us realise it was overtiredness that was the problem. So we started doing a routine of naps in buggy or baby carrier on the day and putting him into cot 2 hours his last nap and it worked mostly. If he cried I'd rock him to sleep, but normally he didn't need it. As he got older we lengthened the time to 2.5 then3 hrs etc. Overtiredness was definitely the problem with our ds.
You could try this? Maybe 2.5 hours after the last nap. After a nice little bedtime routine. Hopefully she'll be in a good mood and just chat to herself until she drops off. You've nothing to lose if it doesn't work and she starts crying just go and get her and have a rethink.

My dd is 8 months and had terrible sleep until recently. We use 20 mins of lullabies and a comfort blankie which has helped a little. Things got a lot better since we gave more formula feeds and cut out bf.

Good luck!