Night feeding a nearly 1yo - habit or need?

[WickedWitchSouthWest]

I'd be really grateful of some advice or empathy from fellow sufferers of sleep deprivation please!

My ds is 1yo in a couple of weeks. He still wakes at least once for a feed but more usually it is twice - approx 12 or 1am and again 3/4am. He has been known to do 7-4-7 which I can manage but in the last 6 weeks he's pretty much waking every 3 to 4 hours which means on a good day I'm getting less than 3 hours sleep in one go. It's really not enough and with dd waking at 6 every morning I'm frazzled.

I know he can go a good few hours without a feed and I wonder if he's waking out of habit / teething means he wants mummy comfort and if we should try to night wean him? We night weaned dd at 14 months as I was similarly desperate for sleep but she had a dummy so was pretty easy - dh would go in and cuddle her, offer a beaker of water and give her a dummy! I have no idea what to do with ds. Tonight he went down at 7:30, woke at 9:30 and dh couldn't settle him, he took a little milk from me and went straight to sleep so clearly only needed a little comfort. He does not do bottles and I don't particularly want to start at his age.

Any good tips for night weaning or is it trial and error?

I'm just so desperate for a little more sleep - even 5 hours would be fabulous right now!

Thanks

Hi. I understand your pain, though my dd is only dc1 so no other child to wake me.

Dd is 13mo and is similarly erratic. Actually though she slept through the past three nights so (fingers crossed and whispering so the gods don't hear me!!) I am secretly hopeful that she may have just suddenly night weaned herself.

I would go onto the breast and bottle feeding page and post there if I were you. They can help best with night weaning.

I hope you get some help soon.

Wicked thought you might like to read this. Really feel for you as my DS was just the same. Have you tried the No Cry Sleep Solution too? It really helped us at that stage.

wicked is he getting plenty of food in the day? If so I'd say it's habit rather than hunger. I'd even stick my neck out and say that I believe if he IS hungry in the night, night-weaning him will make him change his eating habits to get what he needs in the day. Certainly when I weaned my dd off night feeds her daytime eating improved.

I think that at the age your ds is, it's reasonable to expect him to get all the nutrition he needs during daytime hours. It's not like he's a tiny baby who is on a milk only diet that needs topping up on a 24h basis. I'm no expert but I'm fairly sure he doesn't need the sustenance during the night.

If I were you- and this is my personal opinion, I'm not saying you should do it if you don't want to- I'd wean him off the night feed/s. When we did it, dp went in with a beaker of water, then we used the pick up/put down technique which doesn't involve leaving the room. First night she was up for over an hour, second night 50 mins, third night she slept through.

Thank you for your replies ladies, sorry for being AWOL! I haven't been able to get back on the laptop until today.

As a small update I sent dh into see his at midnight on Wednesday night and after 20 minutes of terrible crying (very out of character) I went in and fed him. He slept til 7am! But I'm not making him cry like that every night! Last night I fed him at 11 and again at 4. However he wasn't actually awake, just making noises (not crying) and shuffling about in his cot with his eyes closed. I'm not certain he was aware I was there until I picked him up. So now I'm cursing myself for picking him up at all!

KD I hope you are still getting some sleep! Quite envious if your DD has managed to night wean herself :)
Jilted Thank you, I'm going to sit and read that now while he naps. We have the No Cry Discipline Solution (necessary for a lively 5yo!) so No Cry Sleep Solution sounds helpful. Wish I'd had that with DD instead of the hours spent sat on her bedroom floor...
shush I think you are right. He has started eating alot better this last week. His second tooth has just broken the skin so that has probably not helped. He has a good breakfasts, snacks and two hot meals a day. He likes a beaker of cows milk with his sister before bedtime and has breastfeeds before breakfast, before morning nap, sometimes in the afternoon and before bed. He eats loads compared to dd at this age! I'm off to look up the pick up/put down technique then I think I'll leave it a week and try it on him, as well as not rushing into him if he's making noises in the night. It's like I'm on autopilot now so it's as much breaking my habits as it is his!

Thank you again :) It helps so much to write it out and get some other perspectives.

Clearly I should proof read... him not his and he has good breakfasts. Tut.