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Original poster

The my baby won't nap sign here thread?

493 replies

Zimm · 19/02/2011 11:18

Helllo all,

Until recently DD (6 months) would only nap in her pram, this worked ok-ish. Now even this seems to be failing, yesterday I paced for 1.5 hours to get her to take a 30 minute nap. NOTHING gets done during the day as I am constantly entertaining her. Her night sleep was fantastic (8pm-6am, 6.30am - 8.30am!) but all went wrong at sleep regression and we now have anywhere between 2 and 6 wakings.

I worry about the lack of naps affecting her and making her miserable.

So please sign here if you too have a nap refuser, maybe we can share ideas or just support each while our houses descend into a cloud of mess, phone call go unreturned and exhaustion from street-pacing kicks in!

Zimm

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Geordiegirl79 · 20/02/2011 13:32

Beela and Fortunate I know exactly what you mean - my baby is always the one at baby groups craning her neck to look around and fighting sleep while the other babies snuggle into their mums and zonk out. I have never really tried to make her nap which probably didn't help.

SO the first nap we tried this morning was a bit of a disaster because she started screaming and we gave in and got her up again!!! But about an hour later she was looking very sleepy so I rocked her for a bit then put her down and after a couple of whiney seconds and some finger sucking she passed out and slept for about 40 mins in her cot - amazing!!!

The plan is to try and get a schedule together for next week based on the tips from this thread, so thanks to all!

JudysDreamHorse · 20/02/2011 14:30

sedgiebaby how long did it take you to see results? Have been trying something similiar for similiar reasons for a week and have been disheartened by lack of results. Maybe not being strict enough with naps and also introduced a dummy which not sure helps.
My ds is 19 weeks and usually has 3 to 4 short naps but I take anywhere from fifteen to forty mins to get him to sleep or use pram, car or carrier. He was a non napper till I started the 2 hour rule about 8 weeks but is still hard work - maybe need to shorten awake time.

JudysDreamHorse · 20/02/2011 14:32

Hope that makes sense - am trying to get ds to self settle with sh pat at moment while naps have been work in progress for a while.

vix206 · 20/02/2011 15:01

Jury I reckon you should try shortening awake times I bet it would help. My ds is 24 weeks and today he's asking to sleep every 1.5 hours not 2. I'm having to keep a very close eye because we didn't expect this! We thought we were stable with the 2 hour awake time but he's obviously still very tired despite 3 fabulous nights of 12+ hours with only 2 wakings!!

Fwiw my ds is also the one at play sessions who stays awake and will not sleep unless fed. Or was should I say now?! If it makes you feel any better they say this is a sign of intelligence!

Keep up the hope ladies. I would have rejected my friends advice had she not said 'I absolutely PROMISE you this will work'. I wouldn't say that on here because I've only been at it 3 days but she was so sure that I had to try it and my word she was right!!

I'm watching this thread now so I'll update with our progress and hope all of you giving it a go will do the same!

vix206 · 20/02/2011 15:02

Aipologies judy my iPhone 'corrected' your name for me and put jury instead!!!

vix206 · 20/02/2011 15:07

Oh and chillchill I'm with you on the self soothing thing. I'm actively putting ds to sleep and once he's established it really well, then I'll work on self soothing! Right now it's a case of getting him through the night as well as we can.

Did I mention the other magic number? 3 hours of naps per day. So my basic schedule aims for:

Naps at least every 2 hours
Aim for 3 hours of naps per day
Aim for 12 hours of sleep per night
Bed time fixed at same time every night (for us that's 6pm but may slowly push back to 6.30 once more confident)

And then you squeeze your life in any which way you can around these!! Right I have an eager napper on me so need to get him into his cot quickly :)

JudysDreamHorse · 20/02/2011 15:12

Thanks and no problem vix - my post was made on my phone while I sat in darkened room watching DS sleep so know what it likes. I was originally putting DS down when he yawned or after 2 hours but it was often the same time. It's taken me ages to realise but I think by the time he is yawning it's too late. DS is also never the one asleep in baby groups - he's normally the one crying Sad until I stick him in a carrier and let him suck my finger to sleep or feed him to sleep. I would say he is one of the more alert babies and is interested in everything. My MIL believes anything he does is a sign of intelligence so maybe she's right after all....

vix206 · 20/02/2011 15:18

Judy your ds sounds just like mine!! And yes, by the time ds shows tired signs it is too late and takes longer to settle him down!

JudysDreamHorse · 20/02/2011 15:31

Just wanted to add that I try ang get ds to take first nap one hour after waking and it's always the easist one.
Hope Zimm and others don't think I don't belong on this thread as ds does nap but I still think of him as a non napper. Think it helps in a perverse way that he never goes to sleep without a fight - spend 24 hours a day trying to get him to sleep!

sedgiebaby · 20/02/2011 15:45

JudyDreamHorse I was committed to about two weeks, after a week of doing the shushpat for every sleep (having fed to sleep before) and not caving in once (not easy, as DD did not understand the change) I realised I was doing it wrong. I had been holding her doing the shushpat thing too long. So result being she woke up more!! Because she needed me to settle her using the new means - so I started to put her down sooner and settle her in the cot (again difficult because she wanted to be held) I stuck with it, and began to introduce pick up put down if she got upset. So added the PUPD 5 days ago (I have had to do this a max of 20 times) and last couple of days, most of the time I don't need to do either.

I haven't caved in once, given up (gone into a feed time) but not gone back to old methods.
Hope this explains?

vix206 · 20/02/2011 15:47

Grrrr bloody neighbours and their dog just woke him 10 mins into his nap and now he won't settle. How annoying! Dh is up there rocking him which is our fail safe....

JudysDreamHorse · 20/02/2011 17:01

Thanks sedgiebaby. DS has not been happy with the change either and I've been finding it tough going so it's nice to hear a success story. I need to find the right balance so he doesn't get hysterical but still self settles. At least he doesn't start screaming the second he's put in the cot now so that's progress at least.

chillichill · 20/02/2011 17:11

thank you ZIMM, VIX and the rest of you lovely ladies for this thread. today has been a revelation. dd has had 4, that's right, 4 naps today! she has been a joy when awake. I thought the fussiness was her teeth but now realize it was lack of sleep. she had all her naps in her cot, not on me! I got things done in the house!
she screamed in protest while I rocked her the first 3 naps till she fell asleep and fed to sleep the last one. will work on self soothing next week, just so overjoyed she's napping!

Geordiegirl79 · 20/02/2011 17:19

Judy and Vix, I think we have identi-babies! Mine is also a finger-sucker and just when we think she's gone off to sleep, she grabs the finger back and renews the sucking with greater force.

Just returned from a two hour walk as DD fell asleep straight away when we left the house so I decided to keep her out to try and see if she would stay asleep which she did and now I must say she looks quite refreshed!

Looking forward to seeing what happens tonight and over the next few days and to hear how everyone else gets on.

sedgiebaby · 20/02/2011 17:26

JudyDreamHorse I've been frustrated to tears many times over the last two weeks. And just now baby put a fight for her 3rd nap of the day, I don't consider that I've won this one yet. I asked DH and my mum to keep me going, my motivation has been my nephew who at 14 months was waking hourly due to being fed to sleep, and he constantly looked blearly eyed and totally wrecked - not to mention the parents. The lack of sleep isn't good for baby not to mention mum.

vix206 · 20/02/2011 17:48

Chill that's just fab!!!

CountBapula · 20/02/2011 18:25

Hello all. Just read this with interest and marking place. DS is very nearly 5 months and we get him to do 3-4 naps a day for our own sanity (he gets very screamy when overtired). However, (a) he catnaps - 45 mins max; (b) his night sleep is still crap and (c) he screams his head off before every sleep, even though we put him to bed within an hour and a half of waking. So keen to try and improve naps as much as poss. DH is taking a week off soon so we can start pick up/put down and start to get him self-settling - at the moment he is always rocked/cuddled to sleep.

Fumblina · 20/02/2011 18:59

FortunateHamster - same here, DD can settle herself to sleep at night beautifully. But in the day its a whole other story.

Ooh, and I just remember something else I read. It was that the first nap is the first to establish itself, and as such is the easiest one to tackle if there are napping problems. Certainly I know that on bad days the afternoon one is the worst.

And fairly reliably I've noticed that if she does get overtired and it affects napping bringing bedtime forward an hour seems to 'reset' everything and 'break' the cycle IYSWIM

JoinTheDots · 20/02/2011 19:07

Signing in!

Not willing to leave to cry - just can't do it, and if that means she is forever a bad napper, then forever she will be.

DD just 6mths, will nap on me if rocked, fed to sleep, or in a pram or the car, but thats pretty much it...

Have tried strict routine of nap times and have been unsuccessful to the point of more stress than if I just accept I will be stuck on the sofa for an hour or an hour and a half for the main nap of the day.

Of course I can do this at the moment, as I am on mat leave, and only have one. Goodness knows I might have to change my tune if my situation were different.

Original poster
Zimm · 20/02/2011 19:10

Hello all,

So glad to see so many people here. Well implementing teh advice of Vix and others DD has had 3 pram naps today. She woke about 7.30, Oh got her out teh house before 10 for the first nap, which was an hour, she had 30 minutes around 2 and 30 mins at 5. So not as much as I'd like but better. We are trying for a 7pm bedtime tonight, OH is currently trying to settle her and she is screaming her head off, but I think these are tired cries, her can normally settle her in 20 mins or so...fingers crossed the magic works for us tonight!!

After we crack the poor night sleep we'll try harder to get her to nap in cot...one thing at a time...

OP posts:
Geordiegirl79 · 20/02/2011 19:17

Good luck Zimm. :) Have just bathed DD and about to try feed, bed routine which has previously resulted in much screaming so lets see!

vix206 · 20/02/2011 19:34

Fingers crossed everyone! Ds is deep asleep and has been since 6.10 :)

Original poster
Zimm · 20/02/2011 19:50

DD asleep @ 7.30....here's hoping...

OP posts:
Geordiegirl79 · 20/02/2011 19:59

I don't want to jinx it but put DD down at about 7:30 and she screamed like mad, picked up twice and the second time I put her down on her tummy, she whimpered once then lay there completely still but with eyes wide open - it was weird. I rubbed her back a few times and she remained completely quiet so I left the room and all quiet so far!!!

I feel like we're all in this together! Thanks for the support. :)

Fumblina · 20/02/2011 20:06

DD down 7pm. Went down ok. Fingers crossed.

Has been pretty awful recently. Think we're smack in the middle of 8/9 month sleep regression. Plus teething and cot crawling. She was awake and screaming 9.30pm, 1130 pm, 1.30am, 3.30am and 7.20am last night. And would not settle without milk. So have gone for Calpol straight off tonight Grin