crying it out... how old??

[pugsmum]

I have been trying everything but my DS 1month won't sleep in his moses basket.. The annoying thing is he only wakes twice. Nite for feeds and I wud have brilliant nights if I cud just put him down he is sleepin on my chest on the sofa so he don't sufocate!!!

The midwife said tht we could try leaving him to cry and we tried it once and it worked wonderfully , immediately after 10 mins e fell asleep and slept for 3 hours then again after his first feed....

But I'm sure I can't do this every time and I was unsure that I should b leaving him to cry at such a young age at the time I was so desperate I was willin to try anything. But it broke my heart to do it and I worried about it for ages!!!!

There's leaving to cry and leaving to cry isn't there. Yes, it's harmful to leave a baby to cry for hours on end, but no, not harmful to leave while you have a wee / answer the door / need ten minutes to stop yourself doing something really bad because you're about to lose it. Also sometimes they don't stop even when you've tried everything in the world you can think of!!! I've paced the floor holding mine for an hour before becuase nothing would make him stop - he was crying too much to even feed to calm him down! so just saying "leaving babies to cry is harmful" is a bit silly really.

It looks as though what the OP was doing wasn't CIO anyway. She was in the room, stroking her baby, she didn't leave him to cry at all.

In my earlier post all I was trying to do was to warn against doing CIO in future with a baby this small.

I made it clear that 10 mminutes of CIO (which it turns out it wasn't, anyway) was unlikely to have damaged her child.

The words I used to talk about CIO were rather dramatic, I can see that - but that was not intended as an attack on the OP in any way. Merely against the idea of CIO which I maintain can be damaging - I can't show you the eveidence it is, but you can't show me the evidence it isn't, Containher.

I'd rather not take the risk.

I do wish LITR hadn't assumed wrongly that anything I said was a 'dig' at the OP - why the hell would it be? I was trying to help.

And now she has buggered off none the wiser and very upset, when nobody actually wanted to upset her.

I feel really bad about this.