I want to see the snowboarding version...
Susan packs her trousers with cardboard after yesterday's lesson to protect her coccyx.
Jane holds on for dear life while being dragged on her knees up the slope on the the drag lift as the humiliation of attempting it again is too much.
After an auspicious start, Kate seems ready to take on the higher slopes. After sliding down a good portion of the mountain head first and narrowly avoiding sliding off the edge, she takes the opportunity of lying face down in the snow for a while feigning severe injury while the other beginners catch up, before being ready to face the next section.
As the class hobble to the bar after the class, they stick together in a huddle avoiding the skiers as only beginner snowboarders can understand what it is like out there on a board.
By the end of the week the group had mastered the basics with only some sprained wrists, bruised knees and mild concussion between them. They are all keen to come again next year.