what on earht are you all doing wih tis suiceide stuff

[FluffyMummy123]

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cod, you don't know, I don't know -
quite a few people on here do.
Let them get on with it, I say.

Maybe you and I can learn from them.

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But they DON'T know

suffering from depression does not make you an expert

who knows what else is going in? One of the biggest risks of suicide is coming off antidepressants: are we pharmaceutical experts?

it's a medical emergency not a chat topic

on

Effie, I sort of agree that expert opinion would be welcome.
Sort of, because I am not at all certain that Mental Health Professionals
do have all the answers. And I don't think they are either.

The reason why I am pushing this point with foxinsocks is because
she thinks they are the right and only port of call so I would expect her to respect their authority.

I suspect we need to wait for MNHQ now.

I am very glad that the initial suggestion of pulling such threads has been discarded by most posters now.
It was unworkable and morally bankrupt.

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The assumption that only a trained expert
can pull people back from the brink is bogus.
It's a convenient cop-out.

I might need to call the Samaritans after this thread.
Making the fish chuckle, agreeing furiously with madamez AND dittany.
Quite bizarre

whatever the outcome still feel tittering on this topic a wee bit bizarre

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well I have read some of it

and I do see Franny's point very well

but I don't think you can ignore someone at that stage. what if you did, and they thought even mn, who has helped so many people and is so supportive, doesn't care about me

that 'keeping a suicidal person talking' thing is a good point

but I would like to say something about the Samaritans and how they are the answer to everything. I rang them once when I was 22, when half my household had died within a four-month stretch and I was grieving, when dh (then boyfriend) was on a 3-month acting job and was subsequently never there, and my mother was severely depressed, mourning her husband and her mother, and there was only me and her in the house and I did not know what to do and had no-one to talk to

and the lady at the Samaritans said: "I don't really know what you have to complain about. You can still see your boyfriend on Sundays"

I think mners, in that case, would have been a fuck of a lot more helpful, even if some of them did talk bollocks. The Samaritans are only people after all

Kerrymum - you're hardly averse to being harsh on people, yourself.
Some of those people could well be in despair. LOTS of people go/are going through hell and have an unbelievable amount to cope with.
Or should we only be moderating our own behaviour towards those who wear their suicidal tendencies like a badge?

daddyj, 'not our job' is not dismissive. It is in fact born of genuine concern that we as MNers might be out of our depth in these situations.

And the people getting all excited thing is not mocking of those in despair, but rather of those rubberneckers who do undoubtedly an egrettably come on to these threads.

Yes, it is not only trained experts who can pull people back from the brink, but pulling someone back from the brink is a hell of a task to suddenly load an untrained and hitherto uninvolved bystander with. Some will rise marvellously to the challenge. Some may not.

I did post and stay for quite a sustained period on one of last week's threads - it was the evening and I felt I shouldn't leave - but I made a lot of my posts thinking 'what the fark do I say that is going to make her hold on?' I felt very at the limits of my usefulness. Now, I can handle it, and I know this is not in the slightest about me. But it was a worrying experience, tbh.

DaddyJ you seem to be really saying that mnetters are as useful as trained professionals in a suicide situation, as mnetters are so compassionate?

Jeez. Did you ever read a madeleine mccann thread? Rubberneck City.

And you seem to think 'pulling someone back from teh brink' is quite a straightforward thing, we can all pitch in, few soothing words etc. Bollocks. A genuinely suicidal person needs help that we cannot give, not because we aren't caring enough but because we don't have the ability or the knowledge and should not have the responsibility. Believe me, I've had this responsibility and it's very very hard, even with someone you love.

some people LOVE a suicide thread and I can see hwy they would not like the threads pulled

sad but true

re the samaritans, I'm not saying MNers can't do as good a job (I expect many can)

my point is that they have a support network, they are trained to deal with what happens when the outcome is not good (or if you don't hear), they have someone else to talk to,

THAT'S what I worry about most with these threads tbh: the effect on the people who do get involved

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There is definitely a need for debrief for those who have been affected.
That is a good point which applies to many other topics, too.

It should not, however, be used as justification for denying people in despair the opportunity to talk.

No, it's not easy relating to someone who is considering suicide.
Not everyone can do it (I can't - yet - and have not posted on any of those threads)
but it's plainly wrong to suggest that no one on MN can.

They can. They have done it on two recent threads.
The Samaritans have praised them for it. They are a credit to MN.
Why deny that?

And what is it with this strange obsession about the few rubberneckers?
If they matter so much to you why don't you do your bit by hounding them off it?

we are trying daddyj but you just wont go

Maybe I'm being unecessarily wary, but while genuine mumsnetters will certainly go out of their way to do the right thing with these posts (whatever they think that is), this is an open forum, and anyone can come on. I'm a bit worried that unpleasant people (or just immature teenagers) could post really inappropriate things in response to these cries for help. I really think these thread need to be pulled early to protect the OP(with appropriate info on support as previously discussed).