Mother's Day do's and don'ts

[CarrieMumsnet]

In case you hadn't noticed Mother's Day comes early this year (March 2nd to be precise) and we thought we'd compile (with your help) a list of do's and don'ts which you can then print out and leave lying around in strategic places so partners/ children/ anyone who owes you a gift, can see what you want (what you really really want) and just as importantly what you don't want.

So if you're prepared to risk receiving (yet another) Ann Summers thong then don't bother joining in. But if you'd like to be in with a chance of getting something you actually want, then please share your Mother's Day dreams (and nightmares) here.

(and to anyone joining us from Pedants' corner please feel free to share your views on the old Mothers' vs Mother's Day debate)

Thanks

MNHQ

Don't forget to buy a card ,then rush out sunday morning get the crappest one from the shop then think it will be a good idea to smother babies hand in ketchup and make a cute handprint in card it will not be appreciated

Top of my list is breakfast in bed BUT I'd also like the kitchen to resemble a kitchen and not a bombsite when I come downstairs. Nothing spoils a relaxing lie-in more than having to clear up the mess someone else made when making your breakfast.

Top of my list is breakfast in bed BUT I'd also like the kitchen to resemble a kitchen and not a bombsite when I come downstairs. Nothing spoils a relaxing lie-in more than having to clear up the mess someone else made when making your breakfast.

If your child calls you mummy then DH should buy a card with Mummy on it, not Mum/Mother/Grandma/Nana etc ! It should be the type of card your child would buy if they went to the shop ie not hideous oil paintings of lillies!

Dont arrange to met everyone in wetherspoons as you do every other year coz now they'll bung you ut after 2 drinks each

Don't expect yur Dh to buy for his Mum because as mucha s you and I know he should, he'll either forget or buy rubbish, and she will blame you as it apparently is the Wife's job

No Oil Of Olay!

And if said breakfast in bed is a whopping portion of smoked salmon, try not to buy it from the same corner shop the manky card came from, resulting in mother spending the latter part of the day crippled with diarrhoea and vomiting.

No big fancy present, but something that has shows some thought! A home made card and some home made fudge or truffles would suit me fine.

Breakfast in bed - made by the children - and my list of wants would be met

make sure your DH has no access to any permanent marker pens.

for when you undress your DD and find a happy mothers' day message written on her clean white vest, that has soaked through to the skin under neath and given her a black/purple rash.. you will be very embarassed when you have to take said DD to the doctors for something and lie and say your DS wrote on her to avoid dropping DH in the sh*t !

one word of advice

MOONPIG.COM

loads of great cards you can personalise, and they are very funny and reasonably priced

Just make an effort to help the kids do something. Don't just shrug your shoulders and say "Well, you're not MY mother".

Do book lunch in advance
Don't be a div and think you can leave it to the thursday before mothers day to try to book.

If you do make this fundimental mistake
DONT try to get out of it by saying 'But you are not my mother' to the mother of your children

And if you DO, run like fuck.

And definitely don't say "you're not my mother" to your wife when she is the one who bought, held in front of you to sign, and then posted, the card for your mother...

bumppity bump

schmoltzy but - if you are going to do something from the children then get them involved. a card coloured in from the boys last year melted my heart (they were 6 months and nearly 3 at the time)

-don't expect a lie in, you kids will be banging on the door at the crack of dawn, and you will need to have your grateful face on to meet the bombardment of garage flowers/microwaved croissants that will greet you

-do not expect huge flagons of Chanel No 5, best you will get is a small bottle of Blue Charlie which was on special from the Perfume Shop (or if you are truly lucky, Britney Spears or Paris Hilton's perfume)

-do not expect a day of undiluted leisure and relaxation. The novelty of mothers day will soon go (approx 8.10am) and you will do the dishes and laundry as usual whilst your husband and kids watch Top Gear repeats.

-do insist on being taken out for lunch (make sure this is booked, probably by you, bu early February else you will be having MacDonalds). The alternative is having the kids cook for you, using every pan and worksurface in the house, leaving it looking like something out of Gordon's Kitchen Nightmares (which you will have to clean)

Don't get out of bed. Just refuse.

Don't arrange to play golf with your ex girlfriends father saying that you have invited her mother to come for coffee whilst you are at the golf - for 4 hours!

A lie in, being met by two fed, dressed and happay boys, woken by oodles of cuddles and card done by the children and a £1 bunch of daffs.

Mothering Sunday top tip.
Don't strangle your MIL.
It is likely to make your DH grumpy for the entire day, and he may be tempted to return your bunch of carnations to the filling station.

A lie-in is not an unreasonable request on Mother's Day, nor is expecting the washing up to be done

DH pulled the 'you're not MY mother' trick last year - he has been warned

Daffs v good idea (my fave flower, which makes me a v cheap date at this time of year)

Oh. I meant mothers should refuse to get out of bed. Not DHs!!

how do people get round the 'it's your day' but your dh still hasto treat his mum too so you end up doing what she wants to do ?

You don't dropdeadfred, and IME, even if it is your birthday you still end up trailing round visiting your Mum and MIL.