Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Site stuff

Join our Innovation Panel to try new features early and help make Mumsnet better.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

MNHQ

Mother's Day do's and don'ts

123 replies

CarrieMumsnet · 04/02/2008 18:12

In case you hadn't noticed Mother's Day comes early this year (March 2nd to be precise) and we thought we'd compile (with your help) a list of do's and don'ts which you can then print out and leave lying around in strategic places so partners/ children/ anyone who owes you a gift, can see what you want (what you really really want) and just as importantly what you don't want.

So if you're prepared to risk receiving (yet another) Ann Summers thong then don't bother joining in. But if you'd like to be in with a chance of getting something you actually want, then please share your Mother's Day dreams (and nightmares) here.

(and to anyone joining us from Pedants' corner please feel free to share your views on the old Mothers' vs Mother's Day debate)

Thanks

MNHQ

OP posts:
LazyLinePainterJane · 12/02/2008 20:18

Okay... Dh will normally do something small on behalf of DS (2.6) because he wants to and I think he would feel somewhat deficient if he didn't. I mean a small vase of hand picked flowers and a made card. But I wouldn't expect it as long as DS is too small to understand. I suppose in a year or so, they would make something together and DH could explain the occasion to DS.

It seems a bit odd to me to be sending things from 1 year olds, and not managing to send their own mothers a card.

I send my mother something and I expect DH to do the same. I don't do it for him!

FrannyandZooey · 12/02/2008 20:22

yes the sending things from your dp thing is bizarre IMO
or maybe just kinder than I would be, I would never do it

hannahsaunt · 12/02/2008 20:37

Given it's the same day as my birthday this year, do agree to work that whole weekend (9am - 10pm Fri, Sat and Sun) leaving me with the ds's. This is a GOOD thing as dh normally refuses to engage with the Mothers Day thing and relies solely on contributions from school (leaving me moderately miffed) but now has arranged for my parents to come up which means my house will be sparkling, my ironing all done, my children gloriously entertained ALL weekend and we are going out for fabulous lunch on the day .

bookwormmum · 12/02/2008 20:39

I trolled around to x-dp's house with dd on Father's day the year after she was born (she was born just after it the year she was born) only to find that he'd gone out to play badminton. I thought he might have been expecting me since I'd taken dd around on Mothering Sunday a couple of months previously so his Mum could have make a fuss over dd. Evidently it never occurred to him that these things might be a cause for celebration!

Minum · 12/02/2008 21:02

For me, its about Mothering Sunday, this year I'm doing the Sunday School, and we're going to ice biscuits to serve after the service. Then out for lunch somewhere nice locally.

I want home made cards and token presents. And its not so much about them appreciating me, which I'd find a bit tacky but a day to celebrate the concept of motherhood, and all it means.

LazyLinePainterJane · 12/02/2008 21:09

LOL Franny, I agree. Not sure I would be so kind.

Tortington · 12/02/2008 22:08

my conversation to the twins went

"so...{pause}...what is the date after you birthday?"

"2nd march" [duhhh tone]

"ohhh mothers day" says i

cue rolling of two pairs of eyes

Tortington · 12/02/2008 22:10

i agree that dh souldnt buy cards in lieu of baby or small child.

but should be held responsible if small child hasn't either been given the structure to make something or been taken to town to buy something

BreeVanDerCampLGJ · 12/02/2008 22:37

I insist on being taken to Ikea on Mothers Day.

'Tis bloody empty, they are all at over priced lunches.

choosyfloosy · 12/02/2008 22:52

If you have forgotten the day and remember at 10pm the previous night, all is not lost.

Put your clothes out the night before, maybe downstairs, so that you don't have to wake her up by rummaging through drawers.

Then dress the children in manner vaguely suggesting retro angelic virtue (pinafores, side partings, that kind of thing)... and take them to church, where if you pick your venue, a posy of flowers (or iced biscuits as above) or some other handy present will be provided for the price of a suitably hefty collection contribution. Maybe even a Sunday School so you can decant the kids for a bit.

And while you're there you can repent of your forgetfulness, give thanks for your lovely family and think about Big Important Things which can in fact be remarkably relaxing.

MrsMattie · 12/02/2008 23:09

More sleep, please.

DoodleToYou · 12/02/2008 23:15

Message withdrawn

CountessDracula · 12/02/2008 23:15

do's and don'ts????

Send this title to Pedants' corner

LardyMardyDaisyBoo · 12/02/2008 23:17

Note to all DHs/DPs

DO NOT buy your mother a lovely exotic pot plant in a tasteful ceramic pot, but get your wife 3 manky hyacinths in plastic pot with dayglo stones on the top.

It's the floral equivalent of getting your mum Agent Provocateur undies and your wife hip huggers from M&S

ineedapoo · 12/02/2008 23:21

don't say it's all commercial rubbish !!!!

NoBiggy · 12/02/2008 23:38

Don't complain bitterly that your mother will expect a card from the gc's for mother's day, then look like when told, no she shouldn't get one because I'm their mother, as if it's the first you've heard of it!

magHOOVERlia74 · 13/02/2008 07:37

Blimey you lot ask a lot

A bit of peace and quiet for a bath at some stage is about all I ask for.

A lie in with 5 kids all eager to give me home made cards and biscuits at 7am is impossible

Dh cooks breakfast every sunday anyway and the kids always clear the kitchen so nothing new there.

Flowers die really fast in my house

chocolate is a great idea but it needs to be lots so the kids can share it with me

Dh pays for card/present for my mum and his mum and I choose them

spicemonster · 13/02/2008 07:44

Am I the only person that thinks that the day should be focused more on the mother of the young children (ie me and you) rather than the elderly mother who isn't doing much in the way of day to day mothering?

If the DCs are too young to make a fuss, then isn't it about thanking the mother of your children for being fab and doing 90% of the dull parenting stuff most of the year?

magHOOVERlia74 · 13/02/2008 07:54

But she would have done at least 18 years of mothering and probably a lot more!
My mum is still being a fantastic mother to me, there for me on a daily basis and so is dh's mother so I don't see why they should be left out

I don't think my dh should have to have 1 day to thank me for taking care of our kids, he thanks me an awful lot as do my kids.

And who says parenting is dull?? I love being a parent and in my house dull is not a word

WaynettaSlob · 13/02/2008 08:22

Don't - write do's - it is NOT correct (well you wouldn't write don't's would you?)

sorry.

spicemonster · 13/02/2008 08:34

Yes of course she did loads of parenting. I just think it's nice if the newer mothers are prioritised over the older ones (or at least not expected to cook for them). And you don't find any aspects of parenting dull? Blimey - you must be a saint!

bozza · 13/02/2008 08:35

I disagree that fathers shouldn't provide something from young children. I would really appreciate it if DH took the time to sit down with the DC (who are 7 and 3) and get them to make a card, help DD with it, remind her what order the letters of her name come in etc. I sat down with her last weekend and helped her glitter and glue and make a card for her newborn cousin. So for DH to do this with her for me would be lovely. She will probably make one at nursery though. And DH will probably buy a card and get DS to write it and DD to add her name and a few kisses. And DD would love it if DH took her to choose something for me, whether a bunch of flowers or some perfume or whatever.

magHOOVERlia74 · 13/02/2008 09:17

Lol, no not a saint but with 5 kids there is no way any of it can be described as dull. Hectic, chaotic, fun, stressfull, expensive, noisy yes but never dull

I wouldn't cook for parents at anytime whether mothers day or not but thats coz I really don't enjoy cooking

Dh would cook for his mum anytime though

fircone · 13/02/2008 09:23

Note to dhs/dps:

Do not go on a weekend away with your mates and return on Sunday afternoon with a tea-towel with "Greetings from Southend" on it.

This was my very first mother's day, and I will NEVER forget it...

UnquietDad · 13/02/2008 09:39

Please note that if you say "Don't make a big fuss" or "Don't get me anything expensive", we will a) not make a big fuss and b) not get you anything expensive.

This is known as Listening and Doing As We Are Told. You have only got yourself to blame if we follow your instructions to the letter.

It also shouldn't be about going to your favourite shop with the credit-card. After all, a) it may well be your money being spent as well, if it's a joint account, and b) that sort of thing is for birthdays.

Surely Mother's Day (Mothers' Day? hmmm, one for Pedants' Corner) is about doing/getting/having things you wouldn't normally have, and getting appreciation in ways that money can't necessarily buy.

I think the people who have mentioned home-made cards and the like are on the right lines. Last year the DCs (with quite a bit of help) made DW a Special Mummy book out of a WHS display-book - they put in photos (decorated with various stickers and glitter and so on), artwork they had done, little poems and so on. She said it was the best Mother's Day presen she had ever had. So there.

Swipe left for the next trending thread