The thread this morning about the person asking if some one could deliver them shopping that got deleted

[Byallmeans]

I wish you wouldn’t have deleted it @MNHQ.

I live in that area and I could have took some round and seen it they were ok, I actually replied that I could do this in the thread shortly before it got deleted.

It might have been a scam but it also might have been some one really struggling with no real life support. Not every one have family or neighbours they can ask.

You can’t just rock up to a food bank, there is a process you have to follow a process of getting one of a front line worker such as social worker, GP or citizen advice - all of which you have to book an appointment with which can take days/weeks.

1 in 7 people that use food banks are in employment. Even our beloved NHS nurses are having to use them so maybe if the OP came on and said she was a SP nurse and tax credits had fucked her payments up she would have got a bit more sympathy rather than ‘Reported!!!’ And ‘You again!!’

There has been times when I was working and had to look down the back of the couch for change for bread. This shit really does happen. Luckily I had family to help out, the OP could have been completely isolated and unable to ask anyone else.

Did you block the OP or offer any kind of assistance?

This could have been a scam but it also could have been someone who was desperate and promptly got shut up.

Hi OP

If we delete a thread and suspend an account, it is because we have concerns that our Mumsnet users are being taken advantage of - whether that be financially, or by trolling.

We would never simply delete a thread and ban a user when such serious help was needed - we always direct people to many helpful sources, suggested by our users and compiled by us.

If someone joins Mumsnet with the sole purpose of requesting money or goods, it is an instant suspension we're afraid.

We find that that this process is largely accepted by users, who report this sort of thing to us quickly.

We're sorry that you felt you were unable to help but we value our users enormously, and their safety is incredibly important to us. Unfortunately, we just weren't convinced in this instance that the thread was right for Mumsnet.

That being said, we did contact the OP and offer all the assistance that we could.

Gosh you are so naive.

1. You can just rock up to a food bank, they will ask you a few questions and take details. In these times particularly foodbanks are very flexible.

1. Even if you need a foodbank voucher, gp, citizens advice and schools do not need an appointment to issue it. A quite word in person or over the phone and they will help. Op knew how to post on MN they should know how to google foodbank

1. That previously banned poster was given advice to speak to school ot go to a food bank. They saw these suggestions and said they would. They also replied 'pm me' to a kind but stupenduously gullible poster offering assistance. Was that you?

1. They are working.

1. They only needed 2 days worth of food, who the hell needs online shopping for that?

You are so naive and probably detached from poverty and ignorant about it to believe that poster.

There are LOADS of food banks who will take self referrals. MNHQ cannot allow begging threads to stand - how can you possibly argue otherwise??

I hate to say it OP, but if someone has the intelligence to sign up on MN, they have the capacity to use their phone/mobile to find out how to fix their problems for themselves.

I’m glad threads like that are deleted. Too many people have taken advantage here in the past, and reality is no-one is so alone that a bunch of strangers on the internet is their only hope of getting a bit of shopping. If they have access to the internet, then they have access to the likes of Deliveroo, co-op etc who do same-day deliveries. And if they can’t afford that, then there are food banks.

And people like you offering these people money or groceries or whatever are the reason why these types will keep coming back if the threads aren’t instantly deleted.

I think there are some people who would rather take the risk of possibly helping out someone who isn’t genuine than ignore them when there’s even a small chance that they really do need help and support.

I'm with you @Byallmeans. I'd have helped. I'd rather risk being scammed than letting a mother and child go hungry

@Grobagsforever And that is what scammers thrive on. There are other, better ways to get food if you are genuine.

@Craddle64

Gosh you are so naive.

1. You can just rock up to a food bank, they will ask you a few questions and take details. In these times particularly foodbanks are very flexible.

1. Even if you need a foodbank voucher, gp, citizens advice and schools do not need an appointment to issue it. A quite word in person or over the phone and they will help. Op knew how to post on MN they should know how to google foodbank

1. That previously banned poster was given advice to speak to school ot go to a food bank. They saw these suggestions and said they would. They also replied 'pm me' to a kind but stupenduously gullible poster offering assistance. Was that you?

1. They are working.

1. They only needed 2 days worth of food, who the hell needs online shopping for that?

You are so naive and probably detached from poverty and ignorant about it to believe that poster.

Gosh you sound horrible.

No. You can’t just rock up to a food bank. You may if it’s independent IF there is one in your area. Most are council run.

2 My local CAB IS only open 2 days a week. And you need to get an appointment with all the rest.

3 so what.

4 one in seven people using food banks are working.

5 people who are having to ask for help on line and not directly asking for money.

You clearly didn’t read my op. You sound horrible.

@Clevererthanyou

I think there are some people who would rather take the risk of possibly helping out someone who isn’t genuine than ignore them when there’s even a small chance that they really do need help and support.

I think the problem is that there are many legitimate ways of getting support that don't include registering on a social media forum and asking a stranger to pay for an online delivery for you. The chances of someone who does this being genuine is vanishingly small, but scammers only need to reel in one or two people on the thread with the impulsive good-hearted naïveté to offer help and - job done!

The trouble is some people give money or resources that they can’t afford themselves. And you are perpetuating that idea about a poor child going hungry that these scammers rely on. Not everybody who gives can afford to but they feel compelled to...that’s not desirable either is it?

I think the problem is that there are many legitimate ways of getting support that don't include registering on a social media forum and asking a stranger to pay for an online delivery for you. The chances of someone who does this being genuine is vanishingly small, but scammers only need to reel in one or two people on the thread with the impulsive good-hearted naïveté to offer help and - job done!

Or some people are so suspicious they accuse people who genuinely need help.

I lived near them. It would have been no skin of my nose to drop a few things off. She wasn’t asking for money.

That was the difference- they was asking for food.

Any one that feels pleasure from ‘outing’ a ‘scammer’ asking for ‘food’ tbh need to have a word with them selves

@MrsGrindah

The trouble is some people give money or resources that they can’t afford themselves. And you are perpetuating that idea about a poor child going hungry that these scammers rely on. Not everybody who gives can afford to but they feel compelled to...that’s not desirable either is it?

Maybe each case should be looked at individually. A loaf of bread and pint of milk isn’t going to cost some one their life savings is it...

No be it could be taken out of the mouths of another family

What if it isn’t just food? What if you turned up and they asked for money for gas and electric? Casually mention they can’t pay the rent and are being evicted?

Was it a single mum and child who could pay you back on Friday? I saw a very similar post on another forum that I use ...

"Most are council run"

??

Most in UK are Trussel, aren't they?

Ours is referred to by the borough name, but it's not council-run, it's Trussel.

@Craddle64 your point number 4 - they are working. I'm sure you know this already but sadly, certainly in the food bank that my mother volunteers in, it's our working citizens who are relying more and more on foodbanks. A working status doesn't really mean anything.

I also found your end comment calling the OP naive and detached and speaking down to her a little rude. Basically implying that she was gormless. There was no need for that, surely?

I'm sure if you did a poll on this the vast majority of the site's members would rather that begging/scamming threads ARE deleted.

@Chicchicchicchiclana

I'm sure if you did a poll on this the vast majority of the site's members would rather that begging/scamming threads ARE deleted.

I don’t care. I live in that area. I could have dropped food off.

What if it isn’t just food? What if you turned up and they asked for money for gas and electric? Casually mention they can’t pay the rent and are being evicted?

What if? What if? If they we’re looking in a bad way I might have give them a tenner for leccy. As an adult I can choose who I want to help and make decisions on what I can afford.

I can understand people being guarded over sending money. But if a person is that desperate and asking for food then it’s a different matter:.

Unfortunately, we just weren't convinced in this instance that the thread was right for Mumsnet

‘Desperate people asking for food just isn’t the right look for MN’

The scam defenders are as bad as the scammers. IMO.

Anyone who says that they would rather be scammed is giving out the message that being cautious is selfish because what about that one in a million person who could be genuine.

It is naive to think that a stranger posting a begging thread on an anonymous website is legit. The chances that they aren’t are far, far higher than the chances that they are.

Let’s face it. If people make up stories about lost babies and pregnancies and affairs and domestic violence, then asking for a quid or two is small fry really.

Oh dear op, it’s like you got on that high horse and now can’t find a way to climb down,

Was it you OP? Because you seem awfully keen to defend this individual.

If you’re so desperate to give to someone in your area then why not post a post on your local facebook page offering money to whoever wants it as long as they tell you they’re genuine?

In fact if they’re that desperate then they probably have posted on your local facebook page. Oh but wait, to do that they’d have to reveal their name....

Off come off it OP you know that’s not what MNHQ meant at all. This site does incredible things for people who struggle, not least trying to protect them from being exploited.