Can we have a proper discussion about the way some threads go?

[MissStrawberry]

I am posting after reading an upsetting thread where someone has an unusual problem and are threatening suicide.

I am really embarrassed at the amount of people who are troll hunting, goading and generally acting like they know this is a piss take and are posting accordingly.

We are all meant to be adults but the posters mentioned are acting like immature idiots to my mind.

While I accept no one can make someone do anything they don't want too, it is proven that on line bullying can make someone tip over the edge and take their own life.

What is this was your child, your husband, your wife, your mother, your friend, your child's friend? Wouldn't you want them to be helped, guided and supported?

It does not matter to you if this person is genuine or not but if they are and they die what then if it turns out it is your child, your sister, your neighbour?

If you post a genuine reply on a difficult thread and it is someone taking the piss it does not matter. It you post a genuine reply on a thread that someone is piss taking on it could help someone else.

If you post a cruel or goading thread on a thread that is genuine then you could be adding to their already fragile situation and while you will move on and not give it a second thought it really could mean the end for someone else.

I expect plenty of, it is their own choice, no one can make anyone do anything they don't want too, there must be other issues, etc etc etc but if you are that dismissive and care so little why post at all?

Mental health is not understood by so many people. Even now people say pull yourself together and think you choose to be depressed. Emotional problems the same but while there are supposed adults posting such disgraceful crap I fear for everyone who suffers now and in the future.

One day your child could be posting for help. How would you feel if they were ripped to shreds?

MNHQ - I think you need to have someone permanently on a thread like that as there are many posts on that particular thread that really should be have gone hours ago.

And there are no bounds they wont cross - premature birth, incest, abuse, death, rape. It is very upsetting really.

Thanks. There are obviously some sad sick people out there.

These threads always cause a ruck, as the trollhunters and the credulous thickos go head to head. There will never be agreement.

One thing I will say though is that some people have been on that thread for hours, and probably scouring the web for shooting incidents, while congratulating themselves on how compassionate they are. Personally, I find it rather ghoulish.

Quite BOF

Why is troll hunting not allowed? Presumably in case the alleged troll is genuine? Sorry to be thick but don't want to accidentally do it!

Here's an illustration. A few months ago a pretty well known mumsnetter lost a baby. The very next day a thread popped up from a 'woman' claiming to have lost a baby through cot death. No previous posting history and some VERY harrowing details. That was a troll, the thread was reported (by me and no doubt many others who were ) and deleted. That's what these gits do. They see what's getting attention and they post made up stuff - to feed off people's compassion. It's really, really unpleasant.

I try reall hard not to troll hunt. I report far more than I post but if I see vulnerable people getting in too deep I am going to point out that they may want to retreat to the shallows.

this forum can't help those people other than to point in the direction of RL help.

Or call an ambulance in one case.

That one case was a well known non-namechanging poster though wasn't it? Who'd met people in RL - so all the forum actually did was facilitate some contact between people who already were in contact? That's very, very exceptional and completely different from one off posters.

Primadonnagirl - you also need to avoid posting:

'I call troll'

Not least because as well as being a trollhunting post it makes you look like a twit with an over-developed sense of self importance.

I would tell someone on the internet to call an ambulance, I'm not sure I would actually do it for them though.

People come here seeking support. Most of these problems require RL (family, WA, police, GP etc) support before they improve. In the meantime they have us and mostly we support them until they are able to access this help. We are reminded not to commit more than we can afford. That level of commitment should always be up to the individual poster. None of us are in a position to judge
the commitment level of others. Some posters post into the early hours because it suits them, not because they are
overinvested. And the OP knows they are posting on a public forum and take the risk accordingly.

Beer, you say that the abuse is why these threads should be locked down. I have seen such abuse when an abused or betrayed woman doesn't LTB within a certain timeframe. Should we lock those threads down? Someone upthread mentioned Abortion threads. Should we lock those threads down? At what point should they be locked down? On this thread the most supportive posts appeared later. It takes time to compose a sensitive response, much more time than trollhunting and attacking.

Usual, Troll hunters definitely do damage the site. They hassle genuine posters, they don't ignore and thereby feed trolls and they have ruined many a good joke.

The guidelines are fine as they are. Troll hunting is not permitted. No personal attacks. Do not invest more than you are willing to give, remember not everyone on the Net is genuine.

Had all members adhered to these beautifully simple rules, that thread and many others would be much better. I do not see that MN would be improved by more rules, nor should it become a Helpline Directory.

Yeah umm if the attack guideline had been adhered too that thread would never have got beyond the OP.

Ha! Beer!.... I think I'll be ok then!

Calling posters scum is against the guidelines.

I think the trolls get fed quite enough by all the handwringers tbh,that's what they come here for after all.

They must laugh their heads of at all the deleted troll Hunter posts.

Why Beers?

The author of that thread did not come here seeking support, though.

Some of the first posts there were links to the Samaritans.