dear mn hq, please could something be done about the anti sn posts on mn

[2shoes]

as I know you are aware(I have the emails) people from the sn community have left this week, due to the vile things that have been said to the/or about SN.
isn't it time that mn hq took some steps to eradicate this, as you do with trolls? surely disablist/anti sn/ personal attacks should be deleted and something done about the posters.
or do we just keep loosing well informed, SN educated people from mn.
(no I can't link to a thread as there has been too many)

mamalinosorry I missed that as I don't post in the sn topic

I am very upset with what mn is turning into, i used to see mn as a suppotive place to come for advice, the sn comunity was great (lots of lovely parents offering great advice) but slowlly the sn comunity has shrunk due to some very nasty posters, people who judge us for what we do day to day to support our children. Know one can understand what a sn parent has to go through day to day unless you have been there (and i would not with it on anyone).

I am very upset that Fanjo has left, she is a lovely lady with a georgeous little girl, she does the best each day to support her dd and is doing a great job as are the others who go through the day to day problems with bringing up children with sn's. Surely MN should be her to support those who have it harder than others and not be pushing them away to cope with things on their own?

I know we all have different views on different things (wether its race, religion, anti abortion or what ever) but people should learn to keep things to theirselves so not to upset others. Some of the posters seem to come on here just to cause an argument, i find it very sad that these people have nothing better to do and they must lead very boring lives.

sorry that fanjo has left

Good post Amrne

ANd you I sense some irony that I spend much of my life explaining to ds1 why he should keep somethings to himself ('in your head thought not an out the mouth one') and yet the NT community feels free to exempt themselves from such niceties.

Glitterknickaz has also left, another valued poster.

NormanTebbit the trouble is that defending,educating and challenging takes time and energy, the sad fact is that a lot of people in the sn community hav't got the time nor energy, and if they do they are called names. thinks like professionally offended and sn mafia to name but 2 of the less rude ones.
sadly mn hq don't seem to take it seriously, as seen on a thread where peachy and another poster had posted about it, someone from mn hq cam on and started messing around with the "in crowd" on the thread.....

i have seen some fucking revolting opinions aired on here (this is TSC)
i am amazed that somene calling someone else a pillock can be deleted, yet some of the horrible stuff posted about other peoples children is left standing.

i think given how trigger happy MNHQ are at the moment (and they really really are) to leave 'disablist' stuff up is a real kick in the teeth. My kids (thus far) are NT i have nothing but admiration for those who have the additional challenges of a SN child, there but for the grace of god go all of us eh.

I believe Bullet has also left due to recent threads. One problem with educating is that those with more than 1 child with SN have encountered the most ghastly eugenicist comments, who could face that on a regular basis? Since the economic downturn, families receiving tax credits and benefits, including disability benefits, seem to be fair game for an unpleasant but vocal minority of posters.

The in crowd on the thread? That implies regulars. Can you name people?

I never seem to see these threads but I'm horrified that people are being driven away from a place of support and that MNHQ are doing nothing about it.

I agree, I've some pretty 'petty' (well, by standards of some of the issues I see other parents dealing with) issues I'd like to be able to check out and discuss but am put off by some of the replies I've seen on threads.

I'm not talking about 'chat' or 'AIBU' - I'm the 1st one to put my hand up to admit to messing about on there, but when someone is asking for real help, I think MNHQ should be more active in the role as moderator.

Hope the boards recover soon, it could be a valuable and proud place to be, but far from it right now.

Would it be better to just lock a thread if it has turned abusive? To save people from further abusiveness? Some people enjoy it and this would prevent them being able to all pile in and have a go. I don't agree with deleting as you are protecting the people who have been abusive.

i get tax credits as dp doesn't earn a lot. the right wing media has a lot to answer for in making everyone 'look down' on those they've decided are 'below' them. so working poor look down on benefits claimants etc. nobody is looking 'up' and getting angry about what the rich are getting away with

I am sad to hear that Fanjo has left.

I read the thread that caused her to go, and I cannot say that I blame her. "Specialneedsy"? and then laughing at it.

Do we need for other regular posters to challenge this more often? Would that help?

It feels like the posters on the SN board are constantly challenging this, and could do with general support from the rest of MN. Including MNHQ.

Message from Glitterknickaz:

Right now I am very, very angry. Not so much at the very obvious trolls that existed on my thread in AIBU yesterday but very much at MNHQ. As part of your talk guidelines you state that personal attacks are not tolerated. How much more personal can you get than someone questioning you on your lifestyle and what you spend your money on than some of the questions I was asked in that thread last night? Then when I asked for assistance not only with a longstanding poster that seems to commonly have a grudge against posters who have SN children but with someone who was OBVIOUSLY trolling (policy and procedure refuted by someone with inside knowledge) you refused to help me with this.

The thread I posted was actually very much distanced from my personal life, yet I was asked about it. It had nothing to do with the thread in hand.

Why is it that I, along with other parents who have children with sn, are somehow treated as zoo animals by MNHQ? We are absolutely NOT there to entertain and inform and how dare you have this downright ignorant view. Whilst we will answer questions why on earth should we defend our very existence to what boils down to pork?
As you have probably heard educating pork is pretty much impossible. Therefore why expect this from us? Why should we do this? Why should parents with sn children be treated like we're in a zoo, to inform and educate? Why isn't anti SN trollery treated with the same disdain as racism, unless MNHQ actively supports the sentiment. In which case rather than your tagline being "By parents for parents" it should be "By parents for parents unless your kids are SN in which case fark off because you're not naice". Three members that I know of will no longer post on this site, not because of trolls because that is what is expected, not because of extreme right wing radicalists (which quite frankly need dealing with) but because of MNHQ's attitude when begged to deal with the situation.
You have been told countless times before by me and by others the effect this has on our mental health. If you do research carers generally do have poor mental health outcomes. Congratulations MNHQ for worsening an already bad situation. Having said that assumes you give a shit, which by your actions you've clearly demonstrated you don't.

If I thought for one second that the posts reflected someone's actual opinion and weren't just posted along with made up personal circumstances to get a rise out of parents who are going through hell, then I may want them to stand, too.

oh and "Specialneedsy" is not deemed offensive by mn hq

Mme probably but then who would put themselves up for that?

And I do think unless you have been there it's impossible to get it- but i;ve worked with many people whose situations I don't get yet I get they need support and that's all I need to make me show empathy.

I do think economic downturn has helped with this and I actually get that if your home and income is threatened and you are cared then you are likely to be defensive; I am more than happy to accept that and forgive. But I think some people (and it's impossible to tell who on MN but in RL it's easy) think life is a deserving heirarchy and those at the bottom should STFU.

Actually i've recently been told that god gave Sn people a lower status and that too much input is therefore ungodly. I've overheard that Sn kids being helped prevents NT kids who need it as mucha ccessing support and that fudning decisions are amde on the basis of a preschool visit by a teacher (as if! sic frigging months for non verbal incontinent ds1 to get a TA, had to keep him at home). I've had the eugenicist stuff in RL from a family member (not a blood relation, i hold that difference dear). I'm sick of it.

And the buiggest illustrator has been my inability to ask for help with ds4 who is beinga ssessed comapred to the support I could get when ds3 regressed. luckily ds4 has retained his language but that's a crying shame. At least I knew not to risk it though; for a newbie- ouch.

what herbietea said.

and also i echo what the lovely glitter says, WHY the hell should they have to 'educate' people, they can do that for themselves, hell its not hard with google!

the attacks on glitter were appalling on that thread, apparently she shouldnt even have a pet if she is on benefits ffs

i think its awful that posters are actually leaving, people who need the support of this place more than most others, are so disillusioned and upset by mn that they feel they cant come here! and what will mnhq do? fuck all i bet.

i have been lucky enough to meet bullet, who is lovely and i know glitter offsite as well, they are both amazing women who i admire a lot and i am angry and upset on their behalf.

mnhq should be ashamed of themselves for allowing this to go on for so long, there have been repeated calls for this issue to be addressed and as usual its the same old "we will leave their posts so they can be educated yada yada" well its about time mnhq came and did some educating themselves.

i also am lucky enough not to have an special needs and nor do my children, but that doesnt stop me from feeling huge empathy for those that do and just being immensly grateful for my luck, telling people they should be grateful for their situation and the fact that they get benefits!! walk a mile in their shoes and then feel 'grateful'

i saw the specialneedsy comment and could not believe if was left to stand, utterly disgusting, but the poster did have a rather 'babyish' name so i wondered if perhaps she could only speak/post in a 'babyish' (and highly offensive) manner...

I was shocked at the attitudes on Glitterknickaz thread

The posts are still there if anyone wants to read them

They were trolling as far as I was concerned.making shit up is trolling

is there anyway we could actually get some media involvement, would any of the newspapers, not the daily mail obviously! stand up and say this is NOT ok? maybe if mn got some bad press on the issue they would actually do something (in that they are now editing titles with swearing in them etc)

grasps at straws...

Oh the jaw dropping moment glitter was attacked for spedning DLA on a pet even though it's been shown repeatedly that having a pet can massively help a child with ASD and costs far less than other forms of therapy.

Well I will now out myself: we spend DLA on a pet for ds1. A hamster. It costs me about £2 a week in bedding and food and means ds1 doesn;t cry when I ask him to go to his room (doesn;t make him stay there but it's a start). I am in no way ashamed of this.

I was once told off for ahving a holiday even though it was funded by a charity. And it seems impossible for them to register that DH works. it is of course technically impossible to be a SN parent and earning (that's not to register disapproval of non earning famillies- can happen to bloody anyone at this point in time sadly).