As you're all talking shite someone tell me how to make my toilet sparkle please.

[megglevache]

I have used so far:
vinegar
Coca Cola
Masses of please
Bicarb
Some explosive looking thing called kaboom
Clit bang (or however you say it)

It still loks nasty and stained. Some wonder woman domestic godess please tell me your secrets?

Buy a new one?

Go to hardware shop and ask for something called spirits of salts. Wear rubber gloves, and pour half the bottle down the loo, making sure the window is open (the stuff smokes rather fiendishly -- you don't want to be breathing it in). Shut the lid and leave for 20 mins, then scrub a bit with loo brush and flush.

Bingo.

Is it under the water line?

If so you need to remove as much water as possible before applying product.

A few good hard shoves round the u-bend with a toilet brush normally makes the water line drop right down. Then use something like Viakel to remove limescale deposits. Leave as long as possible.

Harpic (100% lime scale remover one)?

Bleach?

I have used viakal it did nothing. Our water is really really hard and it's kind of a nasty dark rim just below the water line-
Yikes that spirits stuff sounds scary!

oh no am PMSL laughing at clit bang

if THAT doesn't make it sparkle nothing will!

shit have just realised in my OP I list masses of Please (WTF?) it was meant to be bleach M41st&FT!

Neat bleach, leave it for half an hour or so before flushing.

However this only bleaches the limescale, it doesn;t remove it.

I read something somewhere about denture cleaning tabs but noever tried.

Doubt any product will do a brilliant job if you put it in the water, you need to apply neat to the stains.

oh Meg, I read 'masses of please' and thought that you meant you'd just begged the loo to get clean

anyhow, is there anyway you can lower the water level and then attack the stains? (need a plumbing expert here, but I'd do something with the ballcock, if that's what it's called)

By me - 2.06pm

"A few good hard shoves round the u-bend with a toilet brush normally makes the water line drop right down."

Spirits of salts is scary, but it works. When we moved into our house it had been empty for 2 years and was practically derelict. The loo was so foul I got a plumber in to rip it out and replace. He did the spirits of salts trick (used a whole bottle) and it came up all nice and sparkly.

how did I miss that SaintGeorge - sorry!

I think I was blinded by meg's 'clit bang' TBH

This thread is getting filthy.

Clit bangs.
Ballcocks.
Shoves around the u-bend.
And apparently meg is begging for it going by the masses of pleases.

Going to get deleted, you watch.

PMSL yes I've missed old Georgie too!

this thread has made me laugh more than anything else this week!

Blimey, and it's legit and troll free!

Oi - less of the 'old'.

I'm only 21 and a few months.

I've rememebered something else, Kilrock-K descaler, you can get it from hardware shops, it's powerful stuff, and you have to put half the bottle down and leave overnight.

think I'll pass on the spirit of salts trick to dp. Hes always whinging about our loo.

I have been known to scoop out as much of the water as I can with a paper cup and then blot the rest out with kitchen roll before chucking
C(i)lit Bang down there for an hour or two,then scrubbing it with a scourer.
I do like the sound of Spirit of Salts stuff though.Much more fun.

Alkaseltzer or denture tablets left overnight will loosen the stuff, then you can clean as normal and it should come off.