what do we think of anal sex? please be gentle

[LadyLavenderUrchin]

Ok ladies. I need some honest opinions or experiences here if you’d be kind enough to share. i know there are so many articles about this topic but I value firsthand experiences of real people. hubby and I may try anal sex for the first time. he is a good guy please dont think he pushes for it. it is all me. I just want to maybe surprise him for his 45th bday. please dont laugh at me I know it is not that big of a deal for a lot of people but we never done things like this. we have a good sex life - cross my heart I am satisfied but I dont even own toys lol. so this is a big step for me all things considered. I know about the steps I read a lot about how to prepare etc etc.

but my question is this:
do any of you enjoy/love it? truly enjoy it physically? can you get enough pleasure from it to have an orgasm? or is it just some myth? I have a friend who regularly does it with her husband but if anything she says she enjoys the taboo of it and not the feeling itself. so is it possible? or am I expecting something that is not likely? I know it would probably not happen the first few times anyway but maybe later? thanks!

no creepy dms please on the topic from pervs!

I’m happy to answer from my perspective, I am absolutely able to have an orgasm with anal but I do require clot stimulation at the same time for me the combination results in the most intense orgasms, far more intense than a clit or piv orgasm on its own. Don’t get me wrong the first few seconds of anal are always slightly uncomfortable but once I’m going it’s all fine. That’s just my experience but everybody reacts differently to things so just because I enjoy it and cum from it doesn’t mean you will, but you will never know until your try.

Do you currently do any anal play with fingers? It'll be a good place to find out if you think anal is enjoyable.

If you decide to go for it, lube lube lube lube

If you are completely new to anal, definitely go slowly at first - start with fingers and toys like butt plugs and work your way up in size.

anal is not for everyone and if you’re not prepared you will hate it but go slowly and it can feel great for a lot of people.

be as relaxed as possible and use a shit load of lube!

i’d also suggest reciprocating to make it more exciting, don’t leave him out and use fingers and a butt plug on him as well.

My partner isn’t interested in real anal but we both use fingers and butt plugs on each other and they make both our orgasms stronger

Yes, it can be pleasurable.
Yes, it can be uncomfortable.
Yes, the taboo is part of it, but definitely not all.

You do need to think more about hygiene and heath than with PIV, and 1st class communication is needed while you're doing it, so it's worth having a good discussion about it before you get to the bedroom. If you've "never done things like this" and "dont even own toys", there might be better things to do for his birthday. Or if you really do want that to be his present (or yours - your post is a little confusing on that point) then maybe bring it up in a post coital cuddle: "Next time, I'd like to try ..."

Without going into too much detail of what I have done 🙈 Yes I enjoy it a lot. Make sure you use plenty of lube and relax.

thank you. yeah i know it doesnt mean that inwould like it but i am happy for at least the potential be there. why not try i thought.

haha that is good enough for me. tnaknyou for sharing :)

I know what you mean. i don't know we sometimes toyed with the idea before and we sometimes dabbled with fingers a bit but gently only teasing. eversince spring has sprung i keep imagining it and sounds like it could be fun. and if it turns out it's not for us then we will just avoid doing it. thank you for your input very helpful :)

good ideas but I think doing it to him would be a level above ours for now hahah

well when the moment strikes mid-sex fingers sometimes dabble. but only teasing.

I was quite fixated on anal when I was a young man. When I did eventually get to do it I found that, physically, it doesn't really feel very different from piv, so, in the end, the excitement is psychological (taboo, dirty etc). Guys all imagine how much tighter it's going to be and really it's pretty much the same

It also comes, inevitably, with the potential for some logistical issues. We don't really have control over our digestive systems. So don't be surprised if, despite all the care you may have taken, things get messy.

There are some fantasies which work better in your head than in real life

YMMV

Thanks for all the replies. I decided that it doesnt have to be a birthday thing. I’ll just buy some new lingerie he hasnt seen before and wait for him like that. That can be a surprise if the kids will be at grandparents. We can just explore anal later without it being a surprise for him.

I've been grinning to myself every time I see your thread title as "please be gentle" is just so appropriate 😂

I think you've probably made a wise decision, it probably shouldn't be a surprise 😁 Just next time he goes dabbling or teasing, let him know you like it. Maybe get some lube as a tiny amount makes even external stimulation nicer.

And wish him happy birthday from all of us 😉

During my mid eighties “working girl” massage parlour days it never ceased to amaze me just how many men wanted anal via pegging.

I had no idea that was a thing back then!

Oh yes lol

being strict aunty Angela was so much easier than regular massage parlour work !

thank you! very sensible :)

wait what? men who bought a massage asked for anal pegging?? wow

Please tell me you were at least an extra in Personal Services with Julie Walters.

I don't think there's much new 😂

Oh come on, she's Cynthia Payne 😂😂😂

It can feel really, really good.

So I've heard.

Yss this is what I think surely no matter how careful anyone is you just end up with at the very least skid marks everywhere, which is obviously far from sexy .

@LadyLavenderUrchin we did anal for the first time tonight!! Oh my!! I definitely will do it again!!☺️ we are together 8 years!