How do you get your orgasms?

[girlfromyorkshire]

Had a good few drinks with the hubby last night and started talking about how much we both generally orgasm now through various ways. We have lived together about 5 years now and usually have sex together 2-3 a week. He works away usually one week a month too.

I've told him before that I still masturbate when he's not around and I figured about 80% of my orgasms are on my own and likely with my vibrator. He said he is more like about 50% on his own.

Any others have an idea of where they get most of their orgasms?

Mostly on my own, like you.

My husband used to complain that I wasn't vocal enough during sex and I should let him know when I'm about to come. So now I always phone him up and tell him.

Lol love it x

like most on my own sometimes although I do have a oral service pal !

Probably 50/50, alone and with husband.

😂😂

I come easily both with him or on my own, so I guess it’s 50-50. Definitely prefer orgasms when part of a duo though.

An interesting thought!
Tricky to say as how often i sort my self out varies a lot week to week suppose these days it would be typically 50/50
though there were times in the aftermath of kids it was 95/5 and for a long time before kids 5/95!
now idea about my wife, its not something she likes discussing so it could be 100% with me or 80/30 on her own

Tragically about 80/20 alone vs with a friend. He really needs to sort out his priorities.

Well, does sexting count? He’s generally there in spirit!

I have great sex with my husband but like others most of my orgasms are on my own. This is not because he is doing a bad job, just that he is not around at all the times I want to have an orgasm and also I just like masturbating generally, but particularly on my own and using my toys.

100% with DH for the last few years, since perimenopause kicked in. I'm just as keen on sex with him as ever. The only way I can tell that my libido has decreased is that I have absolutely no interest in masterbation.
Mind you, he is ruthlessly efficient. It is always worth my while.

Sounds like you need a new friend. If his benefits have dwindled 😉

I have two different types of orgasm. What I call a clitoral orgasm, and a vaginal orgasm. The vaginally ones are far more powerful, and I can only reach that through prolonged penetrative sex with a well-endowed dominant man who has great stamina. (My lover) It takes a while for him to get me there, but when he does I can have multiple orgasms. One after the other. Clitoral orgasms are nice, but nowhere as good. Both my BF and my lover give me those through oral or manual stimulation of my clit. 80% of my orgasms are from my lover.

In my life, perhaps 70% of the time with my wife and the rest via masturbation on my own. I'd say the opposite is the case with my wife. 70% with her dildo and 30% during sex.

She has a high sex drive but often takes a long time to orgasm and mostly I reach orgasm before her but sometimes, I get the timing spot on.

She does has a sexting buddy via WhatsApp, but I'm not sure how often she'll orgasm with him.

I'd say for me it's around 75% on my own and 25% with my husband. I started to masturbate when I was younger and thought it was something I would just do for a short while but I haven't been able to stop since and still do it frequently. 😂

I sometimes feel a little embarrassed about doing it but once I had tried a vibrator there was no going back. He knows and doesn't mind at all, in fact, quite often he will ask if I have done it that day.

Totally on own now as I’m single!

As I am 59 though I very rarely get the urge and have to almost convince myself that a bit of filthy lit is worth giving up my wine and Netflix for.

Who told you you'd have to give up the wine for a bit of friskiness?!

I can’t remember the last time I masturbated,
it’s not something I have ever really done. DH looks after my needs very well. So my answer is 100% with hubby

I see it as 2 completely separate things. Even if I've had a lot of sex that week with my DH I will still want to masturbate regularly. When I'm in the house alone and I lie on the bed to relax for half an hour I get the urge to get my vibrator out. It satisfies my sexual urges and calms my body and mind. Also its time for me to focus completely on me.
Orgasms during intercourse is more about connecting to my husband and sharing our pleasure.

Like @Braintree says, now I am older not many, I sort of 'forgot'. But since coming back to Mumsnet I make myself have some special moments.

I would say around 50/50 for us. We have sex 3-4 times a week but we both masturbate regularly too.

Dh doesn't masturbate I always do that for him he prefers me to do it and me I do play but mainly he does it

We have sex about daily

basically just from dh, I just don’t don’t enjoy masturbating, I get too in my head and can’t get lost in the moment like I do with a partner.