Embarrassing sex stories

[givingupchocolatemonday]

I'm still not over a very unfortunate event from the weekend which involved a very large bush, unexpected Aunt Flo, unprepared house mess (think toilet stains and worse)
I was caught on a bad weekend, it's not me and safe to say I probably won't see him again. I'm mortified every time I have flashbacks.
Can anyone please make me feel better and share some cringe sex moments?!?!

I was fairly mortified at trying to use a strapless strap on at a sex party. Much enthusiasm for the idea in theory but the reality was somewhat less erotic.

As the name suggests, there is nothing to hold it in place other than your pelvic floor muscles. I'm 48 and have 2 children. I managed to stand up with the bloody thing buzzing away inside me on full vibration, clenching my pelvic muscles as if my life depended on it. A woman I'd been flirting with all evening gestured me to come over and, as I gingerly stepped forward, the toy fell out with an almighty thud and lay vibrating loudly on the wooden floor! Thankfully, she fell about laughing, which made me laugh and we had a drink instead whilst discussing the importance of daily pelvic floor exercises! 🙈