I am a 40 year old woman, I’ve been married to a man for 13 years (together 15 years) and we have two children together aged 11 and 9.
I adore my husband, he’s the most amazing man and amazing father and I love him very much. He’d do anything for me and I know how lucky I am to have him.
But as a bisexual woman I just feel deep down that something is missing in my life. When I think about never kissing another woman again it makes me feel sad. I almost feel like that side of my sexuality isn’t being fulfilled…it’s like a large part of me is having to be suppressed, or denied or something.
I feel so guilty for saying this.
I don’t have any sexual/romantic feelings towards other men at all, I am 100% happy and satisfied with my husband and the idea of even kissing another man is just bizarre, it’s an incomprehensible notion. But like I said, I miss kissing women, and I miss feeling that spark and thrill I used to have when I was with a woman.
It’s like the part of me that is attracted to men is overflowing due to the love and fantastic life I have with my husband, but the part of me that is attracted to women is feeling very empty.
I hate saying it because of all the awful stereotypes about bisexual people “just being greedy” but it really does feel like a large part of me is screaming out for fulfilment but I know I will never have it.
Does anyone else have any similar feelings?