How to tell DP I want him to be more dominant!

[ChloBows1]

So we have a fairly active sex life but I’d like my DP to be more dominant during sex. For example, after I’ve given him oral, there will be a bit of a pause, at this point I’m hoping he’ll move towards me, kiss me on the lips and then flip me onto my back and throw my legs over his shoulders and return the favour. It just seems that I am left leading the way, a fair bit which I don’t mind but I’d really like him to lead the way a bit more.

Just tell him! Read out exactly what you've typed here.

I love your reply PinotPony, but telling him to be more dominant and then him complying actually makes him more submissive in a strange sort of way as he is merely doing what he is told, instead of taking the bull by the horns as ChloBows wants him to.

I do think some honest discussion has to be the way forward, but not about specific acts he needs to perform; it has to be a bit more general in the first instance for it to work IMO.

I would heartily recommend filling in the questionnaires on
old.mojoupgrade.com/ to see whether he is hiding his sexual light under a bushel, so to speak. You never know what he has in the way of wishes, and he may never reveal them without having some sort of green light shown to him. Mojo upgrade is excellent at letting each other know what secret desires you might have.

Best wishes.

@xpc316e I am very guilty of "topping from the bottom"! 😂

That's a really useful link... not seen that one before. Thanks for sharing.

If you don't want to ask him directly, try reinforcing him being dominant. If he does something along the lines you're talking about, let him know. Moan and groan. Maybe even call him "sir".
Or you could instigate a conversation about sexual fantasies and just say what you like and hope he gets the hint.