Is this normal?

[Nameunknown9]

While dtd the other night dp of 10 years asked if he could video what we were doing I said no.
He often hints at another man being involved (not sure if he's trying to turn me on but it does not)
I've only ever had sex with him.
I feel really embarrassed for even asking as I assume it's not normal.

who is to say whats normal? if its not what you agree to and it does nothing for you then what does it matter if its normal or not, just say no. and tell him that it might turn him on but doesnt do it for you. you need to have open and honest conversations with each other so that you are both on the same page.

ive been with the same partner 16 years now and wouldnt ever of said anything of the sort, but over the last weeks its crossed my mind to imagine what it would be like to see her being enjoyed by another guy. I dont think she would be receptive of this idea if i brought it up so its likely gonna stay as a afterthought in my fantasys

Everybody has a different normal, it's about what you feel comfortable with.
If you are not comfortable have a discussion and make your feelings perfectly crystal clear .
At least then if he broached the subject again or god forbid put cameras without you knowing, you knew that you had been firm and he had gone against your wishes if that makes sense.

@isitsummertimeyet - The reality is often quite different to the fantasy. I think you need a very solid relationship for it not to have any impact on your relationship.

Don't be embarrassed for asking. That's what the sex board is for!

There's no such thing as "normal". Different people like different things.

DP and I love a bit of company in the bedroom and don't bat an eyelid at home movies. But if it's not for you, just tell your DP. After a decade together, surely you can talk about what you like or dislike?

People have been making sex tapes for years, but I suppose that now everyone has got a smartphone or tablet it’s much easier to actually do it ?

It was a bucket list fantasy of my previous partner to have a 3some with 2 guys and her, so probably not abnormal either, 🤷🏼‍♂️

But as others say, just say No,

@Nameunknown9

While dtd the other night dp of 10 years asked if he could video what we were doing I said no. He often hints at another man being involved (not sure if he's trying to turn me on but it does not) I've only ever had sex with him. I feel really embarrassed for even asking as I assume it's not normal.

Actually it’s not as abnormal as you think. It’s one possibility in the wide world of swinging. A threesome with my husband and another straight guy is … amazingly hot. I am guessing he’s either been watching “mfm” (male female male) videos or is possibly on a swinging website.

Couldn't agree more. It's perfectly normal for some people. Making sex tapes can be a lot of fun, although I think they're more fun to make them than watch them. Maybe if you filmed your DP playing with himself first you'd know more how you both felt about it.
If your you and your DP spend time apart, and he wants something to watch when you're apart, it makes a lot of sense cos he's getting off watching you not someone else. Which is kinda hot.
I guess the concern these days is whether he wants to share the videos, cos he can't do that legally without your explicit consent. And he can't film you without consent. After 10yrs, you hopefully trust him enough.
I think threesomes are probably best left to fantasies. Too many limbs. :-D

When it comes to sex, there really is no normal. If you don't want to do things then don't do them. If you do, then crack on.