Satisfyer pro 2, what am I doing wrong?

[GivingUpAllHope]

Backstory: I am a very long term married woman, unable to achieve orgasm during sex. Can orgasm by masturbating (with husbands help) after sex, but it's not mind blowing, though very nice, and seems like a "small" orgasm to me (don't know how to describe it, but I can tell that it's muted) ... So I bought a bullet, and I can achieve a different feeling orgasm with that (by myself), but not regularly, and it takes forever (think 50 mins!).. And again it seems "small" somehow. So, I bought a Satisfyer pro 2. Again it's nice, sometimes intense, and I feel like I could have a really intense orgasm (and squirt too.. I can feel its there building up).. But I can't actually come with it.. Even at a very high level. What am I doing wrong? I'm giving up all hope. I remember that many many years ago I used to see adverts in magazines for a "massager" called the "Omaxx".. The tagline was that it could "get an orgasm out of a stone".. I'm beginning to think that I might be the stone that would have proved them wrong.

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If you've found this page in your search of affordable sex toys and essentials that have been recommended by fellow Mumsnet users, you might find our guide to the best cheap sex toys useful. Hope this helps! MNHQ

Nobody had a similar problem?

Have you tried the wand style toys.. designed to stimulate the clitoris? It was a revaluation to me.. best & multiple orgasms I've ever had.. Lovehoney is a good site for them. Ex dp loved the feeling of it on the tip of his penis too so it's a good sharing experience.

Mine works each time for me , sometimes need to have a rest after 5 minutes use but will get there to a wonderful cum . Last evening we used a bullet briefly , plenty of clit stimulation from my DH , he then went down on gave oral then Satisfyer Pro 2 took me to the edge and beyond , DH often has a finger on g spot or just inside my bum while I cum and cum .
Hope this doesn't sound too crude , and don't forget a small amount of lube.
Try again soon when you are ready .

Yes I get this-Thought it was just me!

The build up is great but can't push me over edge -either have to use fingers or bullet style vibrator

You need 1 squirt of lube and you don't need to push it onto your clit, gently rest it there. I usually orgasm on speed 3 or 4. Don't high power it or it will numb your clit.

Speed 3 or 4 for me too.

A lot of an orgasm is mental too so if your head is elsewhere it can be hard to fall over the edge I think!

I read an interesting article by a sex therapist about lots of women "tensing" before orgasm... so it feels like this kind of muscle clenching sensation and you're searching and chasing for the release to come crashing over you... but it never does.

She suggested women could have much more satisfying and regular orgasms by trying to relax during masturbation. So, rather than getting all tense, let your body feel the sensations wash over it whilst staying relaxed. Take your time and stop and start as much as necessary so it's a slow build up. Stop thinking about the orgasm you desire and just focus on how your body feels in that moment.

I'm not sure I've explained that terribly well but adjusting my mindset worked for me!

I'll try to find the link...

I use mine on the second speed to start. Then up to three or four I do need to move it around a bit as I find my clit becomes over stimulated.
Also I agree with the lube makes a huge difference