Whats your take on this (no sex after huge build up)

[Longsight2019]

I’d appreciate your views on a matter which occurred over the weekend.

I’d been away for a few days and was looking forward to seeing my wife on my return. I knew she was going out that evening (rarely gets the chance - was pleased she was going to get some time to herself away from me and the children)

We’d been texting suggestively during the day and had agreed that we would DTD when she got home from her night out. Told her she looked beautiful etc (which she did )

I’d text her to make sure she was ok and told her that I planned on taking a viagra before she got home (recently bought four tablets and enjoyed it last time, so said to let me know when she was an hour away or so)

She text at midnight saying they were going to another bar, no timescale. So I took the tablet anyway and went up to bed.

I began to doze off but could feel the tablet having an effect so kept myself awake when at 12:40 the door went and she’d arrived home unexpectedly.

When she put the house alarm on it triggered a chime to let us know that one of the external doors was open. She realised that she’d left the garage access door open all afternoon so went outside to shut it. With all the chiming and noise I was concerned she’d wake the children up so registered my annoyance lightly by saying “honestly, I wish you’d be more careful with security and leaving doors open!”

When she came back up, she knew I’d waited up but didn’t even bother coming in the room where I was, instead entering the bathroom in total silence and began removing makeup.

At this point I didn’t know what to do, so left her to it for 10 mins. I couldn’t really hear what she was doing so I called her name and asked her what she was doing. I then asked her to come in the room.

We ended up arguing about the whole build up to her coming home, for her to then ignore me and show no interest in me whatsoever, even though she knew I’d taken a Viagra and we’d agreed that we were to have sex that evening. It made me
Feel pretty bloody worthless and like we just aren’t very well connected mentally.

Then our youngest daughter woke up and wanted her mum, so it became impossible to do anything.

I just feel that my wife lacks awareness in this area and that I’ve been left feeling frustrated and disappointed many times in similar circumstances.

Can you see why I’d be upset with this scenario?

Imagine if a woman posted about if she had spent all day looking forward to sex with her husband, they had talked about it, she had bought some lingerie for the occasion, and then he got home, got in a grump over something fairly trivial, and went to sleep. Would she get some sympathy, or would she just get severely told off for being entitled?

On the other hand - “honestly, I wish you’d be more careful with security and leaving doors open!” This would irritate the hell out of me being told this. It would irritate most people. It is insensitive and patronising to criticize someone's basic competence like this.

From your account there was no 'huge build up'. A bad tempered man it totally unappealing, always.

@Scott72
Imagine if a woman posted about if she had spent all day looking forward to sex with her husband, they had talked about it, she had bought some lingerie for the occasion, and then he got home, got in a grump over something fairly trivial, and went to sleep. Would she get some sympathy, or would she just get severely told off for being entitled?

This, x10. I made the same observation myself.
Observing the ebb and flow on discussions like this on Mumsnet has confirmed my long-held suspicion that - in many/most women's view - the sexes are equal, but that women are just a little bit more equal.

And for all those people saying that OP should have gone to shut the garage door rather than let his tipsy wife correct her own silly mistake...hello? He did have a massive boner on! Would it not have been dangerous?!? At best, you'd have had the odd tin of paint knocked over. The worst case scenario does not bear thinking about... "We got a bleeder!"

Do you start the suggestive messages off?