New partner thinks most women orgasm from penetration

[JasmineDaydream]

Had sex with a new partner for the first time recently and during sex and through talking about it since, I've discovered that he thinks I'm quite unusual in not being able to achieve orgasm without clitoral stimulation.
We had foreplay first and during sex but he expected me to orgasm then just from penetration.
Is that really unusual?

Never penetrative ... only ever clitoral orgasms here

I wouldnt spend any extra time trying to come that way, I've never found it especially great, its usually been a bit of an inferior orgasm for me. and as FreeNiki says, a lot of women who say they come via penetration alone are really coming via stimulation of external clitoris rather than internal clitoris only, so you may as well just use a vibrating cock ring or fingers to stimulate external clit. actually, vibrating cock rings are awesome :)

I used to think I was the odd one through not being able to easily orgasm through penetration - but then I read Shere Hite's book books.google.com.au/books/about/The_Hite_Report.html?id=s3OZaVn2wfkC and discovered that actually I was in good company of at least 70% of women! I've never felt so relieved about anything through "group understanding".

I still have troubles with it. But I do know the difference between a vaginal and a clitoral orgasm - the vaginal one is much deeper in the body and a real throb, the clitoral one less so FOR ME - no idea how it works for other women!

out of interest, which do you prefer, those of you who experience both?
my vote is clitoral if I had to choose

Freeniki there was a good study a few years ago indicating that women who orgasm through penetration have a different pelvic muscle distribution. Don't know if that's been confirmed.

I've never come with a partner at all - well once but it was rubbish. I think mostly psychological but not willing to turn sex into a job with exams to pass.

or actually, to be more specific, not during vaginal sex. I like internal rubbing of the vaginal wall at the same time, but a penis is way worse at that than fingers

Painting - both together. I feel a bit "cheated" if I don't get the deep throb as well.

heterosexual women have less orgasms than any other group. I blame mansplaining orgasms.

I dont like that throb, it goes on for ages afterwards in an annoying 'tummy ache' kind of way

Interesting discussion. I by far prefer the satisfying deep inner throb. Clitoral becomes too much too quickly, so I much prefer that as part of a gentle, teasing warm up. The inner throb is when you can feel your body pulling your partner inside you and is the only time I finish feeling properly satisfied.

we must all be quite different. I usually find it dilutes the intensity of the orgasm in an annoying way. I by far prefer clitoral orgasm followed by vaginal sex, usually without a second orgasm but it feels really intense, to orgasm during vaginal sex

I've been sexually active for 21 yrs since I was 17 and only happened to me twice, one of those times it was standing up
I think it is naivety and the porn industry that makes men believe it happens every time.
Certainly not the case here!

Sexually active for 25 years, and never experienced a penetrative orgasm. I have, however, experienced more than a few orgasms in my sleep (and not only when pregnant).

I find that I can orgasm during penetration if I concentrate really hard and grind in the right way. But honestly it's quite hard going and not the most satisfying way to do it. If a man expected me to do this to feed his ego I would be pretty unimpressed

Maybe his previous partners did. I always do and easily and quickly.

it'd be statistically pretty unlikely that most of, or even a simple majority of his previous partners did.

I once read a study that said something like 60% of women interviewed had climaxed during their last sexual encounter, whilst 90% of men said that their partners had climaxed. that gap is the fakers, or else the men were just getting confused.

AdalindSchade, I'm like that too. And I agree about the male ego feeding. Again, heterosexual women have the least orgasms. Im blaming mansplaining how best to orgasm for that.

Absolutely.
I had a man ask me if I definitely orgasmed because my vagina wasn't very wet I had to explain that lubrication happens on arousal not orgasm. I think he imagined women squirt when they come like a man does.

Agree painting. Hilarious discussion with a group of friends in our 40s about orgasms - the only one who orgasmed every time was the one with a female partner. She looked horrified as we went through our travails and efforts. Maybe it is better for younger women?

I always orgasm but that's because I take it into my own hands (literally)
Never had a man take umbrage at it but who knows.

AdalindSchade

I think its worse for young women, worse than it was for me at that age as well as worse because their partners are inexperienced. Im sure I read something about young women having less orgasms than women of my generation did. its porn based fakery to stroke male egos. sad for both men and women imo.

I can't orgasm from penetration alone. I can from clitoral stimulation alone. And clitoral and penetrative orgasms are 100x better. For me anyway.

Like pp said. It's a small percentage of women that can do it through penetration alone. I thought I was unusual until I went online and realised it's normal!

Maybe it is better for younger women?

Sadly, I highly doubt it.

I always orgasm during penetrative sex, but never during doggy style. It always relies on stimulation to the clitoris.