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Original poster

Sex that's too good? How do I make him shag badly?

52 replies

TinderGirl · 17/08/2016 12:56

New guy. Had lots of sex this weekend, but there's lots of cervix smashing and generally "too good" sex. I don't want to be on the ceiling all of the time, but he's not really understanding that while he can do amazing 10/10 sex, I really need some 3/4/5 and 6/10 sex to warm up rather than just going straight into the 10/10 stuff.

But then it's also not 10/10 as I'm nowhere near needing to orgasm.

I really have never had sex like it and it's left me totally bamboozled as to how we can bring it down a lot of notches when he literally seems only able to provide one sort.

I'm hoping to see him again in a few days and it would be nice to be able to properly enjoy sex.

Never thought I'd ever find myself commenting that the sex is "too good" - but here we are....

OP posts:
BreakfastAtSquiffanys · 17/08/2016 13:05

I'm guessing he's all about the 7.
Maybe he needs to know about 1 to 6

eurochick · 17/08/2016 13:07

Cervix smashing is pretty far from my idea of 10/10 sex...

DropYourSword · 17/08/2016 13:09

It doesn't sound 10/10 too good! Confused
Sounds like he's 'enthusiastic' rather than excellent

Ginmakesitallok · 17/08/2016 13:09

Doesn't sound too good to me.

ThoraGruntwhistle · 17/08/2016 13:11

Pounding away like a pneumatic drill does not equal good.

YokoUhOh · 17/08/2016 13:12

My idea of 1/10 sex is what you just described. He's shit in bed, OP, now you need to educate him!

flourpower1 · 17/08/2016 13:13

Um that is not good sex, what you on about!!

PatMullins · 17/08/2016 13:14

I would not like that ShockHmm

jammh · 17/08/2016 13:16

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

CalmItKermitt · 17/08/2016 13:17

I don't understand what you mean.

PurpleAquilegia · 17/08/2016 13:19

How on earth is that 'too good'? Confused It sounds awful.

He sounds like what he watches in porn is how he thinks he's meant to do it in real life.

NineInTheAfternoon · 17/08/2016 13:19

Cervix smashing Confused

All of that sounds bloody awful

JasperDamerel · 17/08/2016 13:23

If you don't have an orgasm, and you aren't really enjoying it, how is that even mediocre sex?

Original poster
TinderGirl · 17/08/2016 13:25

Haha thanks for your comments so far guys. I can't think how else to describe it. It was just like he was over stimulating me, missing out the build up. I quite like it when cock touches my cervix during sex - but mainly because it's usually quite rare. To have a whole evening of it, was just too much. The sex was good, just that I feel that he misses like a whole chuck of it out by skipping to the intense, hard stuff. Short of tying him down and doing it all myself 100%, I'm not sure what else I can do as it's really hard to explain what "normal" sex is and so how do I get him to do it??

OP posts:
Original poster
TinderGirl · 17/08/2016 13:25

Haha thanks for your comments so far guys. I can't think how else to describe it. It was just like he was over stimulating me, missing out the build up. I quite like it when cock touches my cervix during sex - but mainly because it's usually quite rare. To have a whole evening of it, was just too much. The sex was good, just that I feel that he misses like a whole chuck of it out by skipping to the intense, hard stuff. Short of tying him down and doing it all myself 100%, I'm not sure what else I can do as it's really hard to explain what "normal" sex is and so how do I get him to do it??

OP posts:
CandODad · 17/08/2016 13:29

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Original poster
TinderGirl · 17/08/2016 13:34

What do you mean CandODad?? I'm hardly going to post under my usual NN and have that I'm shagging a guy that I met through Tinder come up in the search history along with serious every day mum stuff am I??

OP posts:
dizzyfeck · 17/08/2016 13:36

For me good sex comes from lots of conversation and getting to know what we both like. If he's just pumping away and doing what he wants and you don't feel that you can talk or make suggestions then that's not a good sign. Try talking to him.

jammh · 17/08/2016 14:13

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
TinderGirl · 17/08/2016 14:19

We spoke a bit about it. He's good at doing some things how I like but it's either we're having sex or we're not. There's no 0-60, it's just 0 or 60. IYSWIM?

It's just not what I'm used to at all - but seems to be his "style". Very hard to tell how I want him to do it when he seems to not see that there's any other way to do it. Rather than him watching porn and seeing that's the way to do it, perhaps I had ought to find some for him to watch to show him the sort of sex that I need as I can't think of any words to describe it.

OP posts:
CalmItKermitt · 17/08/2016 14:23

So he's not doing any foreplay?

IrenetheQuaint · 17/08/2016 14:34

This sounds utterly unerotic, and probably rather uncomfortable.

Excitedforxmas · 17/08/2016 14:47

Maybe tying him down and you taking control might show him how you like it !!

Shiningexample · 17/08/2016 15:45

he seems to not see that there's any other way to do it
or it suits him to treat sex as an activity aimed primarily at male sexual gratification where to woman is a kind of living sex toy

BolshierAryaStark · 17/08/2016 22:07

Jaysus, what you're describing sounds just awful-million miles away from 10/10 sex, sorry Shock
Certainly seems he's banging away for his own gratification without giving a thought to yours...

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